IMMORTALLY PROBLEMATIC

Chapter 9: The bond That Binds Us

Rain sat down on the floor, contemplating what he was to do next. He felt his heart break. What was he really expecting from an otherworldly human. Payu had no feelings or emotions and was doing everything because he felt obliged to not because he felt in any way special. This gave Rain two sleepless nights. His eyes had gigantic eye bags underneath but he wasn't going to tell anyone what his problem was, bottling it up. He was embarrassed as it was to be harbouring such feelings for the clueless Payu. He came one step close to him he too three steps backward. It became so obvious when Payu was in the kitchen one of the days slicing spring onions that Rain saw him. Their eyes met, and rain immediately took a 180° turn and left the kitchen. Payu intended to chase him to ask him some questions but it was working hours and he didn't want to create a scene. He sighed heavily. He was upset. The last couple of days, Rain was acting like he had a secret that he didn't want Payu to know about. The fact that they were friends but we're drifting apart for a reason he was unaware of made matters far worse. After work, when it was time to lock up, Payu told the other employees that he would do it with Rain and he wanted them to rest. They were happy and left. Rain was in the kitchen washing everything. By the time he came out, he noticed everyone had left, leaving him alone with Payu. He headed for the door to leave as well, but Payu's voice was heard “ If you don't tell me what is going on, no one will be leaving this restaurant tonight.” Rain was initially startled but ignored him and ran to the door. He turned the handle, it was already locked. He walked towards the back door, struggling to open it but it was locked as well. He went to the place Payu was and said “ Phi, Can I get the key, I'm running late and need to go out with my friends.” Payu responded “ Are you actually late or are you just running away from me?” Rain froze. Payu continued “ you barely talk to me, chat with me, you run away when you see me coming. Have I suddenly become repulsive to you?” All this time, he was talking, Rain was trying and failing to keep his gaze away from Payu's. Payu noticed. He was seated and Rain was standing. He got up, held Rain by the shoulder, turned him around and placed his butt on the table. All of this happened in a second and Rain's mind did not full process what was happening till he was pinned on the table, Both of Payu's hands were stationed on the table, to the right and the left, trapping Rain. He was inches from his face, so Rain couldn't look away. Payu was desperate. If he was back at Arityl, there were a lot of people he could easily talk to and it wouldn't even bother him so much, but here, he had just Rain, who was torturing him by not talking to him and get was pissed off “ Can you just forgive me and tell me what I did wrong so we can move past it, Nong Rain? You know I'll apologize, you know I'll make amends, please.” Rain heard the desperately in his voice, but he was more concerned about their current position. There was no space between them anymore. Rain felt his insides twist. Payu smelt nice, and looked so nice. Rather than face the matter at hand,Rain blurted out “ It must be so nice to be in a place that only gorgeous people exist.” Payu wasn't sure what he was hearing at all. Why does that even matter,but he was trying to settle something so he just went with the flow and said “ it really is, you want to visit sometime.” Rain began to scan Payu. He tossed logic to the wind and looked at him. His shirt was open as he didn't button up completely. Rain was mesmerized and was almost drooling, this was when he caught himself slipping and had to awake from his fantasizing, he stared at Payu's eyes, that was when he cracked. “ I overdid it, didn't I? It was the only way I could get way from you P'Payu.”
Payu replied “ Why do you need to get away from me?”
Rain responded “ because you smell nice.” Payu pulled back, standing now, he was so confused,Rain continued “ because you smell so nice, I can't think clearly, because you smell so nice, my head is twisted. I think... that maybe, just maybe... I might like you, Payu.” This whole conversation blew over Payu's head, as he was sniffing himself. Rain stood up from the table, and looked at him. The differences between them was crystal clear. Rain huffed, he turned to leave but Payu stopped him by holding his hand. “ if you like me, what does that mean? Like you want to be with me, or date me?” Coming from his mouth, Rain saw how ridiculous it sounded, and swiftly changed the topic by saying “ I was angry because you hadn't visited me in a while so I assumed we were no longer close.”  Payu stared at him and smiled. He went to Rain, there was no distance between them as he said “ you really need to work on your communication skills, you made me panic for three days, just to tell me this, Rain...” Payu held Rain's hands and continued “ in this place, you're the most important person to me, if the world turns it's back on me, I have just you to rely on. I beg you, don't do this again, talk to me, if you need assurance, I'll give it to you.” Payu brought him closer and gave him a tight hug. Rain initially didn't want to reciprocate, but his body didn't align with his mind and so he found himself hugging Payu back. Payu unintentionally gave Rain a peck on the forehead, flustering him. He went further by giving him ones on both cheeks. He smiled, interlocked both their hands and walked towards the back door opening it and they both went home. Payu was steering up a fire in Rain, but he didn't know at all. Payu liked it, he liked pecking Rain. He just felt good while doing it. He has no explanation for it but he just wanted to do it. Today was worse though as when he got to Rain's door. He asked the most out of pocket question “ I heard friends kiss and make up after an argument, so can we?” Rain couldn't believe what he was hearing. But Payu was serious. Rain smirked and shut the door in his face. On second thought, he opened it, planted a kiss on his lips and shut it back. He ran to his bed, put the blanket over his face, put one hand over his lips and screamed. Rain was really going through it. He liked Payu, but Payu was a clueless fool who steered up his heart like it was nothing. This was really unfair to him as he suffered his fate alone.

Sky was heartbroken. This was his lover of five years. He was the definition of a sacrificial lover. Whatever Kittichai wanted, he got. Sky had to sacrifice, promising that he would make sure everything worked out. In any area he lacked, Sky made sure he filled it up, no matter what it was. He worked two jobs for him and when he was done, it was Sky's turn to go as Kittichai was done and was already working. He gave a silly excuse that he had a sick mum and all his money was going to her health. Sky understood and paid for his. It was quite hectic but he succeeded. When he asked him that he wanted to change environments, Kittichai was okay with it, but kept postponing the date they would stay together, today became tomorrow, until it was one whole year gone. They had an heated argument over it and Kittichai ended up giving him the keys to his house, so he could come and go as it pleased him. Sky felt something was off when Prapai took him away and Kittichai never bothered looking for him. Sky had to call to tell him . And even on this matter, he was hesitant to let him come. Sky had seen why. Prapai was beginning to get frustrated. He wanted to help him, but he didn't know how to. He looked helplessly as the man in front of him broke down. Even going as far as wanting the memory erased. Prapai never cared for human emotions, as he saw it as fickle and weak. But here he was folding in front of the man in front of him. Didn't know if he wanted to hug him or fight for him, he just desperately wanted to be there for him. As Prapai's heart softened, he could easily heal him now, as he laid his hands on Sky, Sky shifted them, he knew he wanted to heal him, but sky didn't want to be helped. He stood up from the bed, and walked to the bathroom, washing his hands, they stung, but he didn't mind. They didn't hurt as much as his heart was hurting. He brought out the first aid kit. His hands were shaking so it fell to the ground. Prapai hurriedly went to the bathroom which was quite spacious. He stared at Sky and at the box on the floor, he noticed his hands were vibrating. He gently held his wrist taking him to the room and sat him down on the bed. He went back and picked up the first aid box. He brought a stool and sat on it, he placed Sky's hands on his laps and ever so gently applied the disinfectant. He blew on it as Sky was flinching. He kept saying something as he did this “ khǎaw-thôot ( I'm sorry)”  he said this over and over again all through the bandaging stage. He went downstairs and prepared a meal for him. He felt so guilty, if he had known, he wouldn't have left, he would have been able to answer his knocking, he would have spoken to him. The food on the fire nearly got burnt. Prapai took it upstairs set it down on the bed and fed Sky himself. He was going to wait till he was feeling better before he could heal him. Prapai hated silent Sky. As he put him on edge. He didn't know what to do with him. The tears on his face had dried, but the traces were still there. He gave him water, got antibiotics and administered it to him. Waited for sometime before he let him laid down to sleep. He took the plates and hurriedly went back upstairs to check up on him. Prapai was helpless for once. This was the most difficult thing that ever happened as far as he could tell. He fought his way out of problems and difficulties but he couldn't fight his way out of this. He figured that problems of the heart were the most difficult to settle. Sky opened his eyes to see Prapai sitting on his bedside, staring at him, probably frightened from the ordeals of earlier. Sky sat up looked at him and said “Sleep with me?”