And suddenly you're splitting and you can feel yourself splitting but you're so emotionally tired that you just go totally numb
Michaela's journal III
Table of contents-
initial thoughts
-
what the fuck
-
ten months
-
how could you
-
what i didn't say about that night
-
two places
-
issues
-
switched roles
-
song
-
my therapist should get a raise
-
undo
-
i can't help it
-
maybe i should just move to florida
-
stick together
-
sad
-
my fault
-
you drew stars around my scars
-
flaws
-
word vomit
-
and i'm dying to know if it's killing you like it's killing me
-
distraction
-
seriously
-
sorry
-
labels
-
what i like and stuff
-
a word about my dad (several actually)
-
i love you, i'm sorry
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things are good but
-
makeup
-
insane
-
and the thing is
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it never stops
-
awkward
-
fuckkk
-
"is that ok"
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it'll all work out
-
wdyci
-
thoughts
-
...or do you just not want to?
-
sometimes i forget how much anger i have in me
-
be so fucking for real for a minute
-
i do trust you
-
oops
-
what is wrong with you
-
it's a date
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of course he knows
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"not all men"
-
ugh i hate when adults are right
-
"but everyone feels that way"
-
a pathological people-pleaser
-
i don't know what else to do
-
i don't understand
-
thank gods i'm gay
-
and you said that i'm just like dad
-
christmas
-
merry christmas!
-
i want to be me, is that not allowed
-
i just want you to want me as much as i want you
-
the last 24 hours have felt like a month
-
complicated
-
happy new year
-
fuck this
-
please. i've been on my knees
-
i'm a very simple woman actually
-
please don't hate me for being a hormonal teenager
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is it insensitive for me to say...?
-
...
-
good thing we didn't end up getting a fish
-
the intrusive thoughts won
-
dream girl
-
episode
-
crush?
-
why
-
breathe
-
spiral
-
?
-
i'm trying
-
the worst part
-
there's a reason I'm not a daughter of athena
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"i'm used to it"
-
stop.
-
what you're thinking
-
"ok"
-
what i didn't say
-
how are people so normal about this stuff?
-
splitting
-
a few things i like about myself (i know shocking)
-
idm
-
.
-
quiet
-
what's the point
-
OD
-
what i like about myself pt. 2
-
obsessed
-
anxious
-
who would you be if there was nobody watching?
-
i don't know what's wrong with me
-
would my suffering be special then?
-
ESOEMOEHOED
-
maybe different ain't a bad thing to be
-
i don't understand
-
update
-
the archer
-
therapy
-
valentine's day
-
block me out
-
in my head
-
midnight
-
meds
-
:/
-
fp
-
intrusive thoughts
-
eleanor say you love me like you did before
-
i'm not ready to go
-
sigh
-
reasons not to kill myself (ongoing list)
-
grudge
-
anniversary
-
why do good people suffer?
-
asher?
-
pissed
-
the ugly truth
-
another word vomit
-
signals
-
mean things i wanted to say but didn't
-
+
-
if this was a movie
-
bittersweet
-
man i hate taking accountability
-
AITA
-
on purpose
-
it's hard
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18
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