Kisses and Cuddles ~ BoyxBoy

Be Mine

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Kim Namjoon
26

Kim SeokJin
27
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Kim SeokJin's P.O.V

Kim Namjoon, my husband. He's handsome, rich and a tease. But he's arrogant, and selfish. Why did I marry him? My father had set us up, he wanted Namjoon to take over his company. Long before the arrangement with Namjoon I had told my father that I didn't want to be a business man. I wanted to pursue a career in medication.

I wanted the best for my father's company as much as he did. If marrying Namjoon was going to ensure that then I wouldn't think twice. That's exactly what I did the night my family met with Namjoon I signed the contract. I fell for Namjoon's charm the second he greeted us.

When Namjoon and I moved in a month before our wedding he was so kind and gentle. I couldn't believe that I scored such a man. But turned out I stood corrected. A year after our wedding he changed.

I remember the day like it was yesterday. He acted so cruel and as if I was some disease. Now mind you this was after weeks of him getting colder by the day taking more late hours and avoiding me like the plague. I had finished a paper for college and felt motivated. The motivation led me to cleaning the house, cooking a delicious lunch, then I read some books, tended to the garden. At 4:25 I prepared dinner, expecting Namjoon to get home at five.

I sat at that damn table for hours, waiting for him to come home. I called an end to my waiting when the clock stroked ten. I had chills going up my spine imagining what he was doing. Namjoon is my husband, he's supposed to take care of me, love me, and not make me worry.

So when the clock stroked eleven and the grand door swung open and Namjoon came in as if it was 4:00. I greeted him at the door like I would every day. At most I would get a kiss on the cheek. But when Namjoon wasn't in that particular mood he would acknowledge me and carry on through the house. But when I stood in front of him with my hands clasped behind my back, a smile spread on my lips, and a cheerful spirit, all I received was a cold shoulder.

Things carried on like this many more days. I haven't been counting but it's been a while since him and I have kissed. Our kisses were never passionate, never loving. Nothing but a simple gesture of acknowledgement. But I miss them, they have been the only kisses from a partner. You couldn't imagine how happy and needy I was after Namjoon had taken my virginity the night of our wedding.

I felt bad for Namjoon, he wasn't one for cuddling in bed or the simple act of holding hands. After our intimate night I had clung to him. I wanted to see him every hour and every minute of the day. I'm ashamed of how clingy I was. Now I've learned to keep my distance, respect what he wants.

There have been many nights where all I wanted was to be wrapped in his arms and run my fingers through his hair. There have been many time were I just want to jump into his arms and kiss his lips for hours on end. I couldn't tell you how many times I've want to embrace him with warmth and love. It's all been in my fantasies and can never be real.

Currently Namjoon and I are on our way to a family gathering. My father's birthday is coming up and he wanted all of his children and grandchild to be there. This gathering has my heart pounding. My oldest sister and her family are going to be there. Adding in the fact I haven't seen my parents since Christmas last year.

"Could you look a little less nervous, your making me regret signing that contract," Namjoon hissed from the other seat next to me. Something he never failed to remind me. I understand that I can be a little much at times, but am I that bad that someone regrets marrying me, being strung to me by any possible means?