the outsiders oneshots BOOK 1

•DALLAS•

"i think it makes me look tuff," someone said.

it was after a rumble i was laying on the floor. trying to ignore the fact that my head felt like it was going to explode.

"i think you have a another hole in your mouth,"

the door opened and i lifted my head up a little bit and i saw pony.

" pony where have you been?" darry asked.

i laid my head back down and closed my eyes, i didn't want to listen to him lecture pony about staying out late. especially since him being too strict and hitting pony was the start of the entire fiasco these past few days. and currently my kid bother was in the hospital fighting to stay alive. i sighed and listened to pony walk across the living room and towards the bathroom.

"pony are you okay kid?"

"he's dead." pony murmured.

i sat up, my eyebrows furrowed, knowing who he was talking about but hoping i was wrong.

"who?" i asked.

he hesitated before saying,"johnny."

i gasped slightly and bit my lip.

"shit," two-bit groaned.

"i-i need to go," i said standing up and trying to fight back the tears that wanted so desperately to fall.

"wait." soda said making me stop walking towards the door,"where's dally?"
that was a good question.

"he couldn't take it," pony cried,"he's gonna blow."

my breath hitched in my throat and tears fell as i watched pony break down and start crying. i opened my arms and hugged him, he let me hold him.

this must be incredibly hard for him, he was closer to johnny than anybody. besides me but i had the sister card, pony was one of johnny's best friends. dallas was the other.

not only were me and dallas friends but we were lovers also, we had been for a few years now. i wasn't worried about him, i figured that he's smart he wouldn't get himself into any trouble he couldn't get himself out of, right?
but i did want him to hug me right now. to hold me like i was holding pony. to kiss me and tell me that it was all okay. he could do that when he gets back, there's no rush.

right now pony needs someone. he's been through a lot lately and it makes me wonder how strong he really is, how much more he can take before he breaks.

the phone started ringing and steve answered it then handed it to darry.

"we gotta go," darry said putting the phone back on the wall.

"why? i don't wanna go anywhere," pony sobbed out. i put a hand on his back, i was still holding him and he seemed to be calming down a little bit, i used to do this for johnny when he would cry.

"it's dallas," darry told him, but i knew it was directed more towards me,"he's in trouble."

pony nodded and i pushed some of his, now blonde, hair back into place.

we all took off running, following darry. my mind had a thousand thoughts racing around them, they all seemed to be about johnny and dally.

i thought about what dally could've done, and how much it would be to bail him out of jail. it wouldn't be the same for johnny though, i couldn't bail him out. he was gone.

it was horrible, unfair, like he drew the short stick in everything, even life. he always protected me from mom and dad, even though they praised me. i was the golden child, and johnny got punished for things he didn't do. he was the kid that deserved the praise, luckily he found it in the gang. the gang loved him and it made me just as happy as can be for johnny, happy that he saw that he was wanted. if only he could've stayed to see what he had done to the gang now. if he could see how he had broke us all.

first i saw a silhouette moving quickly in the distance, it was dally. next came the sirens. then we all started screaming as dally pulled out his empty heater.

"ITS NOT LOADED!" i yelled as loud as i could. it didn't do any good.

dally was thrown back by the force of the bullet that hit him.

once i finally got to him i collapsed and held onto his jacket. he groaned my name weakly, i held his head up and sobbed into him. i grabbed his hand and i held it, he squeezed it one last time before he went limp.

the light that was rarely ever existent in his eyes appeared one last time before fading for good.

i let out a loud sob and the gang started crying with me. we had lost two members of our family that night.

someone's hand rested on my shoulder as i cried into dally. the person gave me a hug and i knew it was pony.

but i didn't want a hug from pony. i wanted a hug from johnny and if i couldn't get a hug from him i wanted a hug from dallas.

i clung onto him desperately wishing that he would hug me back. i raised my head from his chest and i looked at his face before letting out another sob.

i closed his eyes and kissed him one last time.

i wondered if he could see me, if he wished he could kiss back like i did.

i wondered if it hurt him more than it did me.

but most of all i wondered, why he left me?