Nagpaalam samin ni Angel si Mia na uuwi na daw silang dalawa ni Tim. Babalik na lang daw siya para maibigay niya ang regalo niya kay Yoongi. Pinayagan namin siya ni Angel kasi alam namin na kailangan nilang magusap ni Tim. Magaalas tres na ng madaling araw nakabalik ang members.
"Where have you been?" Tanong ni Angel kay Jimin pagbukas niya ng pinto.
"Yoongi hyung needs us baby. He needs our company". Saka pa lang namin napansin na nakaalalay si JK at V kay Yoongi papasok.
"He's the only one who got drunk". Dumiretso sila sa couch at inalalayang makaupo si Yoongi. Sinamahan ni Jimin si Angel sa kusina para maipagtimpla ng kape si Yoongi at ang ibang members.
"My head hurts". Reklamo ni Yoongi habang sapo niya ang ulo niya. Napapailing naman ang members habang pinagmamasdan siya.
"This is the first time we see him like that--wasted and hopeless". Komento naman ni Hobi. Binigay ni Jimin ang kape pagkabalik nila ni Angel sa living room.
"Have you ever been in love with someone..but you're just too late to realized everything? Have you ever been in love with someone..wishing that she also feels the same but she's already happy with someone else? You want to ask her..is it too late? Is it too late for me to correct all of my mistakes from the past? Then, you'll realized that..everything's changed including her feelings. A part of me wanted her to be happy but..seeing her being happy with someone else breaks my heart. I should be that guy..it should be me but I hurt her and took her for granted". Hindi ako sanay na makitang nasasaktan si Yoongi, sabi ng iba siya ang hindi nagpapakita ng masyadong emosyon sa lahat ng members pero sa ngayon ramdam naming lahat na sobrang nasasaktan siya. Habang nakapikit ang mga mata niya kitang kita namin ang sunod-sunod na pagpatak ng mga luha niya.
"Yoongi hyung, you still have time..you can still fight for her. If you really love her fight for what you believe is right. We will support you, you have us". Sunod-sunod na iling ang ginawa niya ng marinig niya ang sinabi ni V.
"I can't. Suran is pregnant". Napasinghap ang mga members sa narinig nila, natapon ang kapeng iniinom ni RM ng marinig niya ang sinabi ni Yoongi. Halos hindi namin alam ang magiging reaksyon namin.
"The baby is yours hyung? I mean..you're the father? I thought she has a boyfriend?" Pagkukumpirma ni JK. "What happened to the tons of condom you have in your ba----"hindi na natapos ni JK ang tanong niya ng tapikin siya ni Jin. "Ouch! hyung..I'm just asking Yoongi hyung because he always have a condom in his bag".
"Maybe he forgot to put the cond---" sapo ni RM ang braso niya pagkatapos itong tapikin ni Jin. "Yoongi hyung, what happened? How did she get pregnant? I mean, you really had sex? I mean..why? when? Hyung, Bang Pd nim always remind us to use protection that's why he keeps on sending us boxes of condom every month. Don't tell me you're drunk that time same on what happened to Jin hyung? I can't believe this..what's the sense of watching porn if you don't know what to do when you forgot using condom? You can still withd---". Hindi na natapos ni RM ang sasabihin niya ng sawayin siya ni Jin.
"Shut up RM! You're talking too much. Yoongi, what happened?" para namang natauhan si Yoongi, hindi ko alam kung maaawa ako sa kanya o maiinis. Parang ayaw magsink in sa utak ko ang mga nalaman ko ngayon.
"I just woke up one day and we're on the same bed. She's claiming that something happened between us but I can't remember anything. She's asking me to take the full responsibility since I'm the father". Ayaw kong makialam sa issue kasi labas ako kung tutuusin pero nong sobrang down ako isa si Yoongi sa mga taong umalalay sakin. Pinsan ko si Mia, alam ko na hanggang ngayon may nararamdaman parin siya kay Yoongi pero kung totoo man na buntis si Suran at si Yoongi ang ama kailangan niyang panagutan si Suran.
"Yoongi, did Mia know about this?" tanong ko sa kanya. Hindi na ako nagulat ng tumango siya bilang sagot sa tanong ko.
"I talked to her after our concert in the Philippines. I told her that Suran is pregnant..I begged her to stop me from marrying Suran..because if she will stop me from marrying Suran, I'll do it without any hesitation. I begged her to stay with me..she asked me if I love her and I answered her the words I can't admit to myself since the day I met her, I thought she's just confirming it from me because I know I didn't had the chance saying those words that she's longing to hear from me but she asked me to let her go for the sake of the baby. She asked me if I really love her I need to choose the baby over her and I did..even if it's hurting me, even if it means breaking my own heart". Hindi ko namalayan ang pagtulo ng luha ko, ramdam na ramdam ko ang sakit. Naaawa ako kay Mia at naaawa ako sa kanya, alam ko kasi ang pakiramdam kapag hiningi sayo ng taong mahal mo ang isang bagay na hindi mo kayang gawin pero kailangan kasi yon ang gusto niya. Alam ko ang pakiramdam ng ganon kasi ganon din ang naramdaman ko dati kay Jin.
Tumayo ako at nilapitan ko siya, niyakap ko siya ng mahigpit. Nararamdaman ko ang mga masaganang luhang pumapatak sa balikat ko galing sa mga mata niya. Parang nakaharap ako sa isang taong hindi ko kilala. Ibang iba siya sa nakilala ko dati, seeing a vulnerable Yoongi is just like a dream. Nawala ang coldness niya at napalitan ng ibang personalidad na ngayon ko lang nakita.
"If you're hurting so much..cry as much as you can. Crying can ease the pain a little. I understand you're situation right now because I've been there. I know how you feel Yoongi. I'm happy because you're brave enough letting her know how you feel but at the same time I'm sad because asking you to do something beyond your control by the person you loved the most is like ending your life too. You will feel that something is not right, something is missing. You will have a big holes in your heart and how ironic is it because the only person who can fill those holes is the same person who caused you so much pain. I'm proud of Mia because she did the right thing. She made the right decision. I feel sorry for the both of you because you need to endure this pain that you're going through right now. Don't think that you're the only one hurting. Mia is hurting too. Mia suffered too. You'll get by Yoongi..maybe not now but soon". Iniabot ko ang panyo ko, magang maga na din ang mga mata niya. Alam ko biktima din sila ng mapagbirong tadhana katulad ng nangyari samin ni Jin kung saka handa na siyang mahalin ako; ako naman ang parang nawalan na ng gana. Sa kaso naman nila ni Mia, kung saka handa na silang dalawa saka naman nila kailangang magdisisyon para sa ikabubuti ng bawat isa.
Tumayo ako at bumalik sa puwesto ko kanina pero hindi pa ako nakakaupo ng hawakan ni Jin ang kamay ko dahilan para mapatingin ako sa kanya. "I'm sorry for hurting you, I know I already said this before but I will not get tired asking for your forgiveness over and over again". Hinalikan niya ang kamay ko at iginiya akong maupo sa tabi niya.
"Sometimes I wonder if how does it feel to have a special someone but seeing my hyungs hurting like this..I think having a relationship is not for me. It's scary to invest something that you're not sure if you'll end up winning or losing". Komento ni JK na parang sobrang lungkot na lungkot sa mga nasaksihan niya ngayon.
"JK, having a relationship is like a business. You need to invest your time, effort, love, patience and loyalty. How will you know if it will prosper or not if you will not try? Don't be afraid to love". Payo ko sa kanya na sinagayunan naman ng mga members.
"Yoongi hyung, what will happen? Did Bang PD nim know about this?" tanong ni Jimin kay Yoongi. Umiling lang si Yoongi sa tanong ni Jimin kaya parang mas lalong naging seryoso ang mga members. "You need to tell him hyung. He needs to know". Komento naman ni Hobi na umiiling-iling pa.
"I'll tell him but I'm not yet ready. I don't know if how can I tell him about this. Jimin is getting married few months from now then, Jin hyung wanted to quit because he wants to settle down. I don't know what to do anymore. I felt like I fail him. I felt like I fail the person who believed in me during the time that I still don't have anything".
"Hyung, don't be upset. You didn't fail him--it's just that you're just afraid of what Bang Pd nim's reaction after you tell him that he's going to be a grandpa again. We will be here for you, we will get through this. We struggle together since our debut and we will still struggle together even if we decided to have an individual career. Nothing will change". Nagsitayuan ang mga members at lumapit sila kay Yoongi para yakapin ito. Nagyakapan sila at sinigaw nila ang iconic chant nila everytime na ichicheer nila ang isa't isa. "BANG-BANGTAN!" natawa na lang kami sa knila ni Angel, ang sarap nilang tingnan.
"Yuri, before I go back to Korea can you please set me up on a date with Mia please? Just this once".
BINABASA MO ANG
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