The Last Fall

In Mommy's Arms 🦋

CAIYA's POINT OF VIEW

I couldn't help but to toss and turn throughout my bed. Beads of sweat forming on my forehead and the constant uncomfortable groans I lightly let out. My heartbeat getting faster by the second and my hands feeling as if they're unable to pull themselves away from the bed.

Nightmares.

The harmful feeling of suddenly not being able to remove myself from the mattress and feeling like my chest was soon to cave into my body.

"No-..." I immediately said as I felt what seemed like Trey hovering over me and placing his weight on top of me. He didn't want me to breathe, move or break what he was forcing upon me.

I just wanted him out of me. Away from me. Far away from me.

Suddenly, a very deep gasp of air is what I took and I automatically sat up in bed.

My heartbeat was so out of control that I felt as if it was about to stop at any second. My entire back was drenched with sweat and the dark room felt like it was the second level of hell.

My body felt as if it had engulfed itself in that same pain over and over.

I did what I knew that I had to do and I started counting like Mommy told me to do. I still used this same remedy at the age of seventeen.

I closed my eyes and started to count. "One...two...three...four-...f-..five." I said as I then took a deep breath. "S-..six...seven...eight...nine...t-...t-..ten." I ended with. Next, I took three more deep breaths and I felt so much better as the result.

"Okay. Okay." I lowly told myself as I then opened my eyes. Next, I looked down in between my legs. My breathing started to grow faster again.

"No...no...no..." I said as I jumped out of bed and looked down at my shorts. "What the hell?" I asked myself as I noticed the result of my nightmare.

I fucking wet the bed...

I rushed to pull my shorts down and I stepped out of them.

"How, Cai? How?" I asked myself as I went over towards my dresser and pulled me out some new pajamas. Next, I grabbed my shorts and brought them along with me.

I knew that it was just my Mom and I in the house, so- me walking around with nothing but my underwear and an oversized T-shirt on was okay.

I walked down the cold and dark hallway towards the bathroom. Each time I took a step, my bare feet made contact with the cold wooden floor. I tried my best to be silent and not wake Ma because I know that she sleeps somewhat lightly.

Once I reached the bathroom, I slowly opened the door, sat my clothes down and left back out.

I held my shorts out in front of me with a small pinch of the fabric between my index finger and my thumb. I can't believe this...

Next, I walked back into my room and looked around it for a moment. Suddenly, I grabbed my sheets, along with my shorts and my blanket to cover the proof of what happened.

Next, I slightly waddled down the hallway, down the stairs and towards the washer with my bed sheets. I threw them on the ground, opened the washer and then stuffed everything inside. Once they were in, I grabbed the Tide Pods and opened the bucket. I looked inside, furrowed my eyebrows and thought about how many I should put inside.