Writing Prompts (Over One Hundred)

Writing Prompt 160

     Despair courses through my veins. My reflection is dark and stares back at me. I touch up my makeup and try another round of selfies, pursing my lips this way, sticking my tongue out, and smiling, all of the poses. I do them over again. Not happy with a single result.

I feel unloved, and everything hurts. I get a sick feeling every time I see myself. This isn't how I wanted to be. I thought I'd be pretty when I grew up, not like this.

Most people say they want to be a new person, they want things to change, but I want to go back to the way things used to be. The girl who had never let a boy touch her. The girl that was innocent in every way. The girl that had never fallen in love with anything but her dolls and her mother's smile. I wanted to go back. But life goes on and doesn't show the unloved ones mercy.

I couldn't look at myself the same anymore, I was dirty and used and disposed of. I didn't love myself anymore. The body that I had shown a boy now seemed like a cage to me. I hated all of its marks, hated that I was me, wished I could be someone else. Untouched.

The secrets of myself were no longer secrets for myself alone. I wish I was untouched. Unseen. I wish I could be a little girl again. I wish I could die. I wished I could sleep forever.

I wanted to go far away and for everything to change but at the same time I just wanted everything to go back to how it was, untouched.

I wished I could be a little girl again, and to be honest the only way I think that could happen is heaven. But heaven isn't coming to me.

I wish I could be untouched again. I wish the love I thought I felt, could go away. I feel used. Unloved.

     But finally I find a selfie to post and everyone once again thinks I'm perfect.

     To me, thought, I still see the girl who was used and unloved, broken and touched.

Thanks for reading:)

Payton Janae :)