today i'm going to meet josephine' father. i'm nervous, i don't know what to expect - eliza is looking after the kids and then we're going to her dads house.
jo has seen him a few times since but i haven't actually met him yet. i want the kids to meet to meet their grandad.
"jo are you ready" i shout from downstairs.
josephine is upstairs getting ready and she's taking forever, i open the fridge door and take out a juice box from there. i hear footsteps coming down the stairs and i head towards the door, josephine looks pretty - as always.
"you look beautiful baby" i remind her as she gets into the car.
"thank you"
we live around forty minutes away from him and i've been driving for around half an hour, i look up at the satnav navigator and it says we have 9 minutes left.
my stomach is in knots because i am so nervous to meet the man who ruined the love of my life' life. i have mixed feelings about it all, at the end of the day - it's her dad and i can't stop her from talking to him, no matter what he's done. jo said he's changed and i am glad that he has because the way jo describes him - he sounds like an okay person.
i get out of the car and as does jo, i lock the car door and jo knocks at the door. a few seconds later, a man opens the door - he's tall and muscly. his eyes are green, like jo' and his hair is brown. his face has a few wrinkles but i think josephine looks a lot like her dad.
"come in" he tells us both, jo walks straight down the hallway so i assume she's going to the kitchen - i follow her, unsure or where to go.
we're in the kitchen, jo goes into a cupboard and gets out a bottle of water for herself.
shortly after, her dad joins us in the kitchen.
"so hero?" he says to me and i look up at him, he's quite scary but eh.
"yeah?" i look up at the man who ruined my fiancées life.
"what do you do?" he questions
"uh i'm a model and actor" i tell him
he rolls his eyes at me and i furrow my eyebrows, jo rests her hand on mine and i breathe in.
"so where did you grow up" he asks
"london" i reply to him, i move my thumb over josephines knuckle - shes staring at the water bottle.
"oh so you're a posh boy?"
"dad" jo warns and gives him a sharp look.
josephines pov;
i don't know how this is going, hero is sitting there being questioned by my dad and i don't know what to do. i went upstairs to spend a little time with kylie, after all she is my half sister. i knock on the door and i hear her telling me to come in.
she's sitting on the floor playing with dolls, i smile at my sister.
"hi" i mumble and join her on the floor.
a smile grows on her face when she sees me sitting on the floor, ive left hero and my dad downstairs.
zoë is at work, my dad isn't at work - he only works monday, wednesday, thursday, saturday and sunday. he owns a diner, which must be stressful. zoë works as at a law firm, they're both earning good money and i'm glad that they're financially stable.
"how've you been?" i ask my sister who more or less a complete stranger to me.
"i'm good, how're you?" she replies
"i'm good"
"how are your daughters?" kylie asks me, i smile at her question because she really wants to meet the twins
"they're good, they're growing up so quickly" i reply
-
i've been sitting in kylies room for around 15 minutes so i decided to go downstairs to see if hero and my dad have killed each other yet. as i walk down the stairs and get closer to the kitchen - the volume of their voices increase.
i stand at the bottom of the stairs and just take a breath. this feels so surreal, he took my childhood away from me, abused me, made me feel like i was fat and that i needed to starve myself but he was not mentally okay.
he needed help and he left us all to go and get help and i'm glad that he got the help that he needed. dad has a family now, he had a family with us but not anymore. we have george, george is my dad. even though he isn't my biological father, he is my dad because he was there for me. i call micheal 'dad' but only because he is my biological father.
-
we're home now, the girls are asleep, adam is about to go to sleep. he's watching youtube in his ipad and then he'll probably fall asleep soon. i had a warm bath when we got home and sat in there for an hour, hero came in and gave me a massage when he put the girls to sleep which made me feel a little better.
i'm so tired but not physically, mentally. i am mentally drained.
hero and i are in bed now. he's tired and so am i, we need a lay in tomorrow.
"did you know my mom and your dad dated?" hero tells me.
wow? martha's and my dad?
"no" i shake my head; that's weird
"small world" i mumble.
i cuddle into hero and pull the blanket up to my shoulders.
"i love you" i mumble and kiss him
"i love you too" he replies.
and we both fall asleep.
