LOVE AND MARRIAGE

Hurtful Tears

August

It had been a week and I was emotionally fucked up. It's not the same waking up without Desire. I looked in the mirror and the blows that she gave me left a few marks. They are fading away, but it reminds me of the pain I caused her. Dayvion knew something wasn't right because of how he looked two days ago. He was so used to seeing his mother in the kitchen playing with him and me.

I didn't realize I was crying until a tear dropped on my hand. I leaned over the sink with my head down as I cried for all the hurt I caused. I couldn't do this shit without her and somehow and some way I was gon' fix this shit. I managed to get myself together and headed downstairs to make me something to eat. I moved around the kitchen making me a sandwich. As I looked around I realized this big ass house was empty without my family.

I finished making my sandwich and sat at the bar. My phone started ringing and it was Twan, but I didn't wanna talk to him. I wasn't ready to hear how stupid I was from anyone. I already knew that. He had been calling since Monday, but I couldn't deal right now. I stared off in space thinking about how good Desire and I are. I know that we are meant to be together, but its just gon' take some time to get this shit back on track.

I sighed and sipped from my gatorade. I looked up when my doorbell rung. I groaned in irritation. I got up and headed towards the door. Once I got there I swung it open and it was Twan.

"Man the fuck up wi-what the hell happened to yo face?" Twan asked as he stepped inside.

"Its a long story, one that I don't care to talk about." I closed the door and headed back to the kitchen.

"Fuck what you sayin nigga. What's goin' on with you?" He studied my face trying to read me.

"Just got a lot goin' on right na."

"Mhm. Well where is Desire because Nedra been tryna to get in touch with her, but her phone is going straight to voicemail. That's why I been calling you cause I figured you knew what was up."

I held my head down in shame. I knew once I told him what I did he was gon' light into my ass.

"I fucked up Twan." I looked up at him with tears in my eyes

"Fucked up? What tha' hell yo ass mean bruh?" He narrowed his eyes at me.

"I cheated on her."

"You cheated on who? I know not Desire?"

I didn't say anything I just sat there feeling like the ass of the year.

"Aug man what the fuck is wrong with you? How could you cheat on her? That girl loves you to the moon and back. She holds you down and has been by your side through the worst of the worst. You my nigga and all, but you dumb as fuck. Desire is a good woman bruh and she didn't deserve that."

I could see the anger in Twan's eyes and that made me feel even more stupid.

"Who was it with?"

"Asia"

"Who is Asia?"

"La-"

"Bruh you cheated on Desire with that La'Cucaracha chick?"

"Yeah man, but I didn't mean fa' it to happen. I tried to push her away but she kept coming and then I was high as fuck. I didn't penetrate vaginally,but I let her give me head." I ran my hands down my face.

"I'ma tell you some real nigga shit Aug. I don't give a fuck how high you were you should have fought her off and let her know this wasn't happening. You gave her a piece of you that only your wife should have. I don't care if it was just head Aug. That damn girl didn't have no fuckin' business with her mouth on you."