LOVE AND MARRIAGE

Give Me Time

Desire

"August what are you doing here?" I asked as I folded my arms across my chest.

"I need to talk to you. Can I come in?"

I sighed and stepped to the side and let him in. I walked over to the sofa and sat down. He sat down and stared at me. I looked down at my hands that were placed in my lap. I looked up and he continued to stare without saying anything. I became a lil uncomfortable with his penetrating stare.

"August you said you wanted to talk, so talk."

"Desire I wanna say first off that I don't like how we are with each other now. I miss us the way that we were. You don't know how much this shit is killing me inside. Everyday I think about what I did and how I should have never let it happen. You gotta know that I am so sorry. I never meant to cause you any pain. I should have listened to you when you were trying to tell me about her, but I overlooked it."

He adjusted his hat and stared at me. I knew he was waiting on me to say something, but I was taking in everything that he said.

"August I don't like the way we are either, but I can't just act like it was a simple situation. I know that you are sorry and I know that you are hurting, but there are some things I wanna know. I mean I have been thinking about this since I found out." I stood up pacing back and forth in front of my coffee table.

"What is it that you wanna know?" He cleared his throat and looked at me.

"Why didn't you stop her? I mean you could have, but you didn't. I know you pushed her away, but you still allowed it to happen." I stopped and stared at him.

"Desire I was not in my right mind I was high as hell and I was caught at a weak moment."

"So you being high made you not realize that what you were doing was wrong and that it was gonna hurt me?"

He didn't say anything. He just stared at me.

"August I never in a million years thought that you and I would go through something like this. I mean you told me all the time before this happened that you loved me and that you would never do anything to hurt me. Even when I warned you about her you would still say it was business. I never questioned it because I trusted you. I knew that you wouldn't do anything that would jeopardize us, but then this happened."

"You know what hurts the most is that you were really into it. You enjoyed every moment of it." I laughed void of emotion and shook my head. I saw you on the security camera. See La'Asia went and told people that she slept with you. It fell into one of my students hands and they gave me heads up. Should it have come from my student, no it shouldn't have. You knew for two fucking days and didn't tell me." I stared at him and he looked so guilt ridden.

"Desire I was afraid to tell you. I didn't know how to tell you, but I wanted to tell you that night." He stood and came in front of me.

I shook my head and walked into the kitchen. He was right behind me. I leaned up against the counter and he stood across from me. There was a moment of silence and I broke it.

"August I want you to know that I still love you so much and that's why this hurts so bad because you broke the trust that I had for you. I feel like I gotta worry about everytime you get high you gon' go out here and get caught up. I don't wanna feel like that and shouldn't have to feel like that."

"Baybeh please fa'give me. I'm so sorry and I will do whateva' I gotta do just to have you back by my side. I love you too damn much to lose you Desire." He stepped closer to me.

"Would you be so forgiving if I let another nigga go down on me?"

I saw the angry glint in his eyes and I knew then that it wouldn't be easy for him.