The Devilman's Epiphany ✔️

XLVI- He's finally vulnerable

"Rex my fucking arm is asleep." I said after he refused to let me go. He picked me up with a laugh and we showered together for the first time. "Rex I completely forgot about it but have you found the spy?" I remember he made me go get a guy so he could learn who's working for him. "It was the doctor. But he was working for your mother." He said as we laid down on the bed upstairs. I was laying on top of him and looking up at him as he rubbed my back and played with my hair here and there.

I knew it was him.

I wish I pushed him more and got him to give me something. Any type of proof. Now that I get to think, I realise Rex's life was better without me. He was untouchable. No one could dare to get to him.

But now he's finally vulnerable.

People can get him by using me. He knows that. He's not stupid. Maybe if we break up he'll go back to his old self. Alina will be more protected. I'll be free and go to collage. Live the life I want.

Live the life I've always wanted.

But now I can't think of a life I'll enjoy living without including Rex.

It's so selfish of me to hold on to him. I'm putting him in danger. "Arabella, I'm not liking that expression." I looked up at him and saw him watching me carefully. He's going to get hurt because of me and I'm just deliberately letting that happen. "Rex, I love you." He narrowed his eyes before kissing my forehead. "I love you. More than anything." He responded which made my heart pound. "Are you sure this is what you want?" I asked and he waited for me to go on.

"Losing your power. For me? Your reputation, everything you've built." I said and he frowned. "I'm not losing anything. Leonardo has control over some of my men, that's why he's an issue. No one else is a problem, Arabella. Why are you eating yourself up with this bullshit." He sat up pushing me off so I could get a good view of him.

"I've told you this before and I'll tell it to you every day for the rest of my fucking life if you need to hear it."

'Don't forget what I said, I don't repeat myself.'

"Before I met you I had no purpose for anything. My life was a puzzle I never bothered to solve. Not that I wanted to anyway. Then you just fucking came crashing in. I didn't like you. I fucking hated you. With everything I have because of what I felt for you, Arabella. You cleared everything and I was afraid of that just like you were. You knew how to find me and lead me."

'People like me and Rex are... like drugs. We'll make you believe we love or like you and make you happy till we get what we need and you have nothing left.'

"So don't even fucking think of dumbass breakups Arabella. I'm nothing without you. The only cases where I'll ever let you leave is if you ever stop loving me or if you're in danger." He pointed a finger at me and I pushed it down before holding his hand. I shook my hand. "I don't think it's possible to stop loving you." I looked at our joined hands because I don't know how to handle these types of intimate conversations.

I looked up again after the water in my eyes were gone. I leaned in silently and gave him long, breath taking kiss. He rested his forehead on mine after I pulled away to breathe. "Do we just stay here till the danger is gone?" He cupped my cheek as we just stood like this. "I don't know. I might need to go." I narrowed my eyes. "I'll go with you if you leave." He nodded since there was no room left to argue. "Can we just talk about this later. I just want to fucking hold my girl as long as I can." I giggled as he pulled me and laid down. We just spent the day in the bed and then he decided to take me out on a walk.

"I feel weird in public with you." I admitted as he walked me to a park. It was very beautiful and crowded even though it was afternoon. He looked at me questioningly before standing in front of me. I wrapped my arms around his torso and he wrapped his around me. "I feel more threatened than ever. Have you been seeing the death stares I got in the last five minutes." He smiled making his dimples pop and turned his head to the side. "I was too busy playing the protective boyfriend by looking at boys who're checking you out." I grimaced at the way he explained it.

"Never say that ever again, please Rex." He let out a chuckle before looking at me admiringly.

"Red makes your eyes pop." I was wearing my red beanie again and he couldn't stop staring at me. It made my heart flutter. "You remember the day by the lake." He nodded. "I really wanted to hold you because you were really cold. But I couldn't because I liked it too much." He nodded. "I'm glad you realised." I narrowed my eyes and he smiled at me.

Smartass bitch.

I rolled my eyes at him which made his smile drop and made me laugh.

"By the way, where are we?" I asked as he took my hand and we walked further. "My hometown. It's more my mothers home town in Romania. The house we're staying in the house she grew up in. I bought it because... I can." I widened my eyes and looked away. His mothers house where she grew up? And we just... her couch... He laughed when he saw the way I was looking. "She doesn't come here anymore." I sighed and ignored his smirk.

He let go of my shoulder and grabbed my hand when we reached a empty area next to the trees. I raised one eyebrow when he held my waist with one hand and the other didn't let go of my hand. "Is this the dance you promised?" He shook his head. "I'm going to sweep you off your feet with that dance I promised. This ones just because you look extremely beautiful as always." I tried my best not to smile but failed miserably.

When did I fall for such cliche words?

"Sometimes I wonder how many times have you used these lines on other woman." I lied with a sigh and he rested his head on top of mine as we swayed slowly. "There was no other woman before you. I don't need to make up shit to have them." I haven't thought of that. But there are other things I've thought of when me and Rex were apart.

"I've thought about marriage." He pulled away to look at my face which made me hide in his chest. "Don't make me nervous!" He chuckled and rested his head on my head again.

But I can feel his heart beat speed up.

"If marriage means spending the rest of my time with you, loving you and having you till the day I die, I'm in. But I don't want to live like a programmed robot." He took a deep breath. "When we were apart and you didn't know my bluff I had this dream. There was just a little Arabella running around in my house. It was my daughter." I narrowed my eyes and breathed deeply. Children. "I never wanted a child before. I despise them. But imagine having a piece of us in our life, Bella." He played with my hair when I refused to look at him.

"I'm too damaged. I can't be a good mom." I finally admitted. "Bullshit. You always think badly of yourself with these type of topics but it's okay for now. You don't need to think of that." I finally raised my head and he smiled at me sweetly. I returned it before he leaned down to capture my lips.

~~~

One of my biggest fears is a boring marriage but I've never really thought about marrying anyone ƪ(˘⌣˘)ʃ

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