Forest // Changlix

Chapter 62

"B-binnie.."

"Please.."

Felix had been crying for the past 2 minutes. Changbin hadn't moved. He hadn't said anything.

He was petrified.

Changbins heart was ripped apart just by hearing his boyfriends desperate pleading, but he couldn't answer.

All he could do was let his tears run down his face.

He didn't know where all of these tears were coming from, they weren't stopping. They were silent though, no sound, just internal pain.

"Please talk to me.. b-binnie" Felix pulled away, his cheeks tear stained, his face flushed red, eyes puffy and swollen.

He cupped the olders cheeks with both of his hands, wiping the tears away with his thumb, though more came rushing out of Changbins eyes.

He leaned in, his last hope, the thing that would always calm each other down. He pressed his lips against Changbins, his heart even in this situation, fluttering from the warm and soft feeling he got.

Though that feeling quickly went away, when Changbin didn't kiss back.

He didn't kiss back and Felix thought this was it. Nothing was going to save this situation if that kiss didn't.

He pulled away, sobbing. He couldn't handle this situation anymore. He didn't know what to do. He didn't know how to act or how to make this better.

"I'm so s-sorry C-changb–"

Changbin suddenly, without any warning, crashed his lips onto Felix', kissing him deeply.

Felix' eyes widened at the sudden action, but he slowly closed his eyes as well, letting himself melt into it as he kissed back.

Both of them having tears streaming down their faces, pouring all their emotions into that one kiss.

It took Changbin every last bit of energy to move and kiss the younger. And he didn't regret it one bit.

Kissing Felix reminded him of happiness and joy. Of the feeling of being loved and of his reason to be alive.

Felix was his reason to be alive.

He slowly lowered Felix' upper body to the ground, now being ontop of him.

He did this to further deepen their kiss, but it wasn't a kiss of lust. It wasn't sexual at all. It was both of them trying to get rid of everything that had been building up today.

Felix' legs out reflex wrapped themselves around Changbins torso, his arms around the olders neck.

Changbins lips would always feel welcoming and warm. They were soft and gentle, able to make you feel what real love is.

They kept doing this for a moment, enjoying it, their tears slowing down and eventually stopping.

Changbin pulled away after a while, hovering over Felix and looking at his hurt eyes. Changbin didn't look better, in fact he was in a way worse state than Felix, yet he didn't want his baby to suffer.

Neither one of them said anything, they both just looked into each other's faces for a few short seconds, though those felt like hours.

That, until Changbin let his body fall onto Felix', his face against the youngers chest, hugging him tightly that way. He listened to the heartbeat, it wasn't rhythmic and pretty fast as well.

It still calmed him down. It made him feel like there's a reason for him to be alive, as long as that heart was beating.

Felix started running one hand of his through Changbins hair, just like how the older would usually do it for him. He knew it worked, when Changbin further relaxed his body.

The amount of releave Felix felt was insane. After not knowing what to do and practically panicking to death, Felix was now here, peacefully laying with his boyfriend, both of them not crying anymore, but holding onto each other for support.

"Felix.." Changbin mumbled, almost inaudible to the other.

Felix could swear he almost teared up again after hearing the older finally speak up.

"..thank you Felix"

"N-no don't thank me"

Felix felt so much better when Changbin started nuzzling his face onto his chest. It wasn't usual for them to be like this since Felix is the one cuddling onto Changbin most of the time.

"Thank you for loving me.."

He got no response for a while, until after a few moments, Felix stopped his hand between Changbins hair.

"Don't thank me for loving you"
"You're my family Changbin"
"I can't help but love you without any ending"

Changbin didn't answer to that, he just held onto Felix until he finally truly had completely calmed down. His heart was beating normally again, his breathing steady and no more tears either, same with Felix.

He sat back up, reaching out his hand for Felix and pulling him to sit up as well. Surprisingly though, he kept his head low when Felix looked at him.

He felt defeated from what had happened, he felt like he caused Felix all of this stress and pain and he didn't want to look into his boyfriends hurt eyes.

So for the first time and a long long while, Felix was the one placing his hand under Changbins chin, making him look up into the youngers eyes.

Felix' eyes looked tired and exhausted, but so did Changbins and both hated to see the other one like this.

"Since when are you the one not looking at me?"

"Sorry.." was all he managed to say "sorry for the pain I caused you"

"Don't say that!"
"I love you Changbin" Felix smiled as far as he was able to, drawing a saddened yet genuine smile out of the older.

"I love you too"