Grian Oneshots

Incorrect Quotes 1

Grian: Do not come over to my house. If the house is on fire you may knock once, if I don't answer assume I set the fire and I want to burn to death.

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Iskall: I just had a long talk with Mumbo and Grian about hitting and now they are yelling "it's my turn to perpetuate the cycle of violence" before hitting eachother.

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Mumbo: Anyone else feel good when their brain releases a bunch of endorphins?
Iskall: Can't relate.
Grian: Why would my brain release a bunch of dolphins?

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Scar: Anyone d-
Grian: Depressed?
Iskall: Drained?
Grian: Dumb?
Mumbo: Disliked?
Scar: -done with their work... what is wrong with you people...

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Grian: I am darkness. I am power. I am your worst nightmare. I could kill a man in more ways than you can imagine. I am the night. I am fury, I am a weapon, I am-
Scar: A doll.
Iskall: A cinnamon roll.
Mumbo: A sweetheart.
Grian:
Grian: ...stop it.

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Grian: *dangling from a rope over a pit of fire* Remember when I said I'd tell you when we're in too deep?
Iskall: Yes?
Grian: We're in too deep.

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NPC Grian: I am 39 cheetos tall.
Scar: Why... are you measuring your height in cheetos?
NPC Grian: Because we're out of doritos.

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Grian: *walking around disappointed after visiting an aquarium*
Xisuma: Grian, what did you think a tiger shark was?

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Mumbo: You know what's funny about Grian? He's my best friend, and anyone who'd hurt him is someone I'd murder, probably.

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Ex: Alright, listen up you little shits.
Ex: Not you NPC Grian, you're an angel and we're thrilled you're here.

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Xisuma: All of your existences are confusing.
Architechs: How so?
Xisuma: Your presence is annoying, but the thought of anything bad happening to any of you upsets me.

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Grian: How stupid do you think I am!?
Iskall: You really want an honest answer to that?

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Grian: Mumbo, what's does IDK, ILY, and TTYL mean?
Mumbo: I don't know, I love you, talk to you later.
Grian: Alright, I love you too, I'll ask Iskall.
Mumbo: Wait- Grian, no-

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Grian: Did you hear that!? Iskall just threatened to destroy my lego AT-AT!
Xisuma: ...You just threatened to kill him in his sleep.

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Grian: *holding a salt packet* It's just a little sodium chloride.
Iskall: Actually Grian, it's salt.
Grian: That's what I said, sodium chloride.
Iskall: Uh Grian, that would be salt.
Iskall: *takes salt packet from Grian* This is iodized table salt, which in addition to sodium chloride contains anti-caking agents and potassium iodate, which is added to prevent iodine deficiency. So not only are you being overly pretentious by insisting on using scientific terminology for everyday items, you are factually wrong. Your arrogance is your downfall, you annoying little shit.

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Grian: Mumbo...
Mumbo: Oh no, "Mumbo' in B flat.
Mumbo: You're disappointed.