Grian Oneshots

8 (3) ~ Christmas [Angst]

Before this, there was smut and fluff published. They aren't connected, I just wanted to make one of all three categories.

TW: Depression; Suicidal thoughts & behaviors; Self harm;

Requested: No.

~

Grian looked out the apartment window.

He was numb.

He hadn't felt in so long.

He was 27 now.

(Read the trigger warnings if you haven't.)

There was nothing he had to live for.

Grian walked to his bathroom, and looked at himself in the mirror.

His eyes were sunken in and looked dead. His arms were covered in old scars and cuts.

He stopped for a moment, before walking to his room.

He pulled out one of his notebooks and started writing.

He ripped it from the notebook after finishing writing.

He placed the note on his counter, before going back to his bathroom.

He picked up a razor blade, and started cutting his arms up.

...

Mumbo found himself at Grian's door.

He was worried for him, but they hadn't met in months.

No one had been able to get in contact with Grian for the past few weeks.

Mumbo knocked, and grew more worried as time went on.

Eventually, Grian opened the door.

His fluffy messy hair, was way messier than he'd ever seen. He looked like he hadn't slept in months.

"Grian?" Mumbo asked concerned.

Grian sighed and welcomed him into the apartment.

A paper on Grian's counter caught his attention, and Grian picked up the paper and threw it away quickly.

The two sat down on the couch, and Mumbo looked at Grian again.

There was some bruises on his neck, and some on his hands. There was some visible bandages under his sleeve. His shoulder was stiff, and he didn't have his signature smile at all.

"Are you okay, Grian?" Mumbo asked.

Grian glanced at Mumbo.

"Yeah." Grian said blandly.

"Your lying." Mumbo said. "You obviously not fine."

Grian rolled his eyes.

"I'm fine." Grian insisted, looking at Mumbo.

"If your fine, then why aren't you talking to anyone? Scar, Iskall, and X are really worried about you, Charles." Mumbo said, anger laced in his voice.

Grian stood up and glared at Mumbo.

"If your going to be rude, you can leave." Grian said. "And never call me by that name again."

"Grian that's not-" Mumbo tried.

"Leave." Grian said, walking to his bedroom.

Mumbo stood up, and walked to the doorway.

The paper that was on the counter came back to his mind.

He walked over to the kitchen trash quietly.

He opened it and picked the paper out.

Shock flew through him as he read the suicide letter.

...

To whoever has the bad, or good, luck of finding this.
I'm fucking tired of everything.
You all are fucking idiots, if you think you could save me.
I have nothing to live for.
Hell, I've had nothing to live for since my 19th birthday.
Everyone will be better when I'm dead, no. Everything will be better.
No one would care anyway, why am I writing this?
I guess I should mention David and how much he let me in on the big secret.
I'm useless, worthless, ugly, fat, and should die.

...

Mumbo ran to Grian's room and opened the door.

Grian turned to Mumbo pissed off.

"What the hell Mumbo! Why are you still here!?" Grian yelled.

His sleeves were pulled up, one was bandaged, one was cut up and bleeding. A razor blade was held in Grian's left hand.

Mumbo walked up to Grian, but stopped when Grian flinched back.

"S-Stay the fuck away." Grian said, fear visible in his eyes.

"Grian... What's wrong...?" Mumbo asked Grian, concern very visible in both his face and voice.

"Why the fuck do you care?" Grian asked. "I'm useless and everyone hates me."

"No you aren't." Mumbo said. "Your amazing, brilliant, and an amazing friend. No one hates you, and no one would ever think negative of you."

Grian just glared at Mumbo.

"Your lying. Just so I can trust you and you can get close to me, just to break my heart." Grian stated.

"I'm not. I'd never intentionally break your heart, or do anything of the sort. Your my best friend, and if you died I'd never be able to get over your death." Mumbo said, he paused slightly. "Because you aren't just a friend to me. Your my best friend and I love you. I wouldn't be able to get over you, because I've loved you since I met you."

Grian shivered slightly.

"...Your lying." Grian insisted.

"I'm not, Grian. If I was, what would be my reason to? We've been friends since childhood, you know I won't take advantage of you, or anyone."

Grian looked downward, and started crying. Mumbo walked to Grian, and hugged the shorter. Grian began breaking down in the younger's arms.

...

Mumbo hugged Grian, as he leaned against the wall. Grian sat on Mumbo's lap, head in his chest, them talking every few minutes. Mumbo rubbing Grian's back in a circular motion.

"Who's Evan?" Mumbo finally asked.

Grian stiffened, causing Mumbo to become worried.

"...Evan's my ex from the beginning of college..." Grian said, quietly.

"If you don't mind, can you tell me why you mentioned him on the note?" Mumbo asked, Grian hugged Mumbo tighter.

"...Maybe later..." Grian said.

Mumbo nodded and didn't push.

Grian smiled softly into Mumbo's chest.

"Do you want me to stay over for a while?" Mumbo asked.

"...I don't want to bother you..." Grian said.

"I don't want to leave you alone. Everyone will understand." Mumbo said.

Grian frowned as he thought about everyone.

"Gri?" Mumbo asked.

"What am I going to say to them...?"

"You could just say that you've been going through a rough patch. They'd understand." Mumbo said, putting his head onto Grian's.

Grian smiled slightly.

"...I love you, Mumbo..." Grian said.

"I love you too."