WOOSAN -Real

95

Wooyoung's pov:

It hasn't been horrible so far. I guess I can get used to feeling nothing every time we kiss.

She squealed at the red rose I gave her. I tried to look happy as she jumped up and gave me a hug, clinging on to me in a way that made me wanna push her off.

You were just embarrassed with all the people watching you

Yeah. 

I stare at my phone as I wait for her to return from the restroom. We had dinner together. It was nice. One thing I can say for sure is that she's definitely someone I can enjoy spending my time with.

She's fun. Has a good sense of humor. Compassionate.

And beautiful

"Yeah yeah" I mutter to myself as I watch her return.

I look at her slim figure and perfect features.

She sure is beautiful.

Just not-

"Sorry I took so long..Let's go now?" I nod at her and allow her to cling on my arm as we walk out of the restuarant.

"Woo.."

I school my face before looking down at her.

"Yeah?"

"Are you okay?"

My head immediately starts throbbing as I try to come up with something to say.

"It's okay if you don't want to tell me..You just seem a little off that's why"

I nod at her before struggling to get the right words out. "Yeah no I'm-fine. Totally. I'm just-" I pause trying to figure out what to say. Gayeon interjects to help me out.

"Nervous?" 

"yeah"

"me too" I smile back at her and she gives my cheek a quick kiss before waving down a cab.

The cab smells musty, it feels suffocating. I feel an irrational panic creep through my veins as it gets harder and harder to breathe.

I'm gonna lose him

I don't say anything and throw my arm around her shoulder as she nestles her head against mine. She takes my hand in hers and plays with my fingers.

Her skin is soft.

We don't say much as the cab strolls on.  I want to check my phone for new notifications but my arm is stuck around her. 

We pass a row of ugly grey buildings as she lifts her head and looks at me. Her face is close to mine. Too close.

"Almost there" she whispers and I nod internally sighing as I try to prepare myself for what is to come. I don't pull away when I suddenly feel her lips on mine, her delicate fingers grazing my skin.

 I attempt to feel. Her lips which have to be soft. The lightness of her touch. The feeling of her breath against mine.

Except that I can't. I feel like a doll, a puppet being used to entertain someone. Or is it the other way around. 

Is she the puppet or am I the doll? I let her pull me towards the steps of her apartment, up the stairs and towards her door.

She looks at me for a shy second before unlocking her door and leading me in. I don't fail to notice her unusually clean bed, the new dim light on the stand beside it. 

"I'm gonna.. wash my face real quick okay?" I give her an acknowledging nod before walking over to her bed and sitting on it. I take my shoes and socks off.

I try to clear my head and smile at her as she finally immerges from the bathroom, her sweater off and exposing her bare white shoulders.

Soft.