Shelby heart- Completed

😥John- Scars of love

Y/n stood in the bathroom, staring into the mirror at her ill fatigue. The stress from life had made the dark circles around her eyes stand out, now more than ever. Not having the energy to eat had made it possible to see her ribs without having to breathe in even the slightest bit. And the anxiety from God knows what was making her once thick and luscious hair to grow thin. Wiping away her tears, she put on her dress, curled her hair and applied makeup to hide her thinning features

Look back at the mirror, it was as if a completely different person was there. Whilst the physical depression had been covered, the scars on the inside still burnt her soul. Y/n left the bathroom and walked down to where John was reading the newspaper before he had to go to work

"Morning love"  y/n greeted her boyfriend. Although not yet married, the pair had brought a house together. First as friends wanting to escape the chaos of their own families, and now as partners

"Careful darling. With a dress like that I might have to fuck you right here" he said going up behind and squeezing her bum

"Oh behave" she laughed as did he

"What are the plans for today?" John asked biting into his toast

"Ada is forcing me to go dress shopping. Which reminds me. You know how you love me so much?" She asked going over and sitting on his lap

"What do you want and how much will it cost me?" John asked

"Can I just borrow some money for a dress please?"

"And by borrow you mean spend and never give back" she kissed John

"If you give me the money then I'll use some of it to by lacy lingerie. I might even give you a little fashion show" John smirked at the idea and handed her his wallet. She took out some money and gave him the rest back with a passionate kiss. John then had to leave for work and once he left, y/n was left alone with her thoughts. That was never a good thing. It meant they had chance to take over

Y/n really wasn't sure what had made her feel so depressed. Nothing terrible had happened in her life. Both her parents are still alive. Although not rich, they certainly didn't struggle for money. No one she really knew had died. No traumatic events had taken place. Sure the war had happened which obviously took a toll on everyone's mental health. But she felt fine once it was over. It's only these past two months that her world has suddenly become a pile of shite. And John had no idea. No one knew, she hid it so well. Always seemingly happy and cheerful but inside, something was killing her

Y/n and ada went shopping in the afternoon as the two had expressed their boredom to one another the other day. The girls walked arm in arm, laughing through the streets. They had bought many dresses and y/n had stopped to get lingerie. Ada enjoyed helping her choose some out until she remembered these would be for her brother and suddenly she wanted to leave the shop

Ada went home after they'd both had a drink and y/n walked back alone. It was dark and cold and she suddenly realised what was going on. She shouldn't have left Ada's side. Especially not whilst shes feeling abit tipsy. Y/n felt a wave of fear as she walked past alley after alley. Her fear was gone when she saw the lights for the garrison. As she walked closer, a group of men, clearly drunk, stumbled out with cigarettes and bottles of alcohol

"Fucking hell Arthur. She was a sight for sore eyes" Oh thank god. It was Tommy, John and Arthur. She rushed over and flung her arms around John's neck, kissing him as a single tear rolled down her cheek. Luckily John didn't see

"What you doing out here alone? Anything could've happened?" He yelled before hugging her again

"Ada was drunk so I walked her home and then tried to go home but the house must've moved" her speech was slightly slured and she heard Tommy chuckling at her

"Sounds like ada ain't the only one. Right come on, let's get you home" they walked home, hand in hand and eventually, y/n passed out by the front door so John had to carry her up the stairs and put her to bed. He started to take her clothes off when he saw something. It was a cut on her arm. And when he noticed that, he saw all the others. She had worn a coat today so he hadn't seen them. Oh god. John felt awful, angry, and overall guilty. He carried on getting her undressed and then got in bed himself. His arm wrapped around her waist ad he kissed her head, feeling and overwhelming sense to protect her even more than before

The next morning, y/n woke up and felt an arm around her. She was at ease until she noticed she didn't have her pyjamas on. And her arms were showing. Hopefully John was too drunk to notice. She moved his arm carefully so she could cover up but he spoke

"I already saw them sweetheart" y/n felt her heart in her throat and suddenly began bawling her eyes out. John sat up and sat her inbetween his legs as she hugged him tightly

"What made you do it y/n?" He asked with tears in his eyes

"I don't know. I've felt miserable for months John, for no reason at all. And although I try and act happy, it was getting too much. I was in the toilets at a club. I saw all my makeup and it made me angry, like I was hiding how I really felt and didn't know how to express my feelings. Anyway, there was some glass broken off one of the mirrors and I used it to cut myself. And then I drank away my sorrows. I've never done it before, but it felt deserving. Like I needed to do it to be truly punished for how I feel" by this point, both John and y/n were sobbing in bed as he held her to his chest

"Oh my love, I had no idea you felt this way. But you'll get through this. And I'm gonna help you however i can. But next time you ever feel this way again, I want you to tell me. Because I won't judge you, and I won't brush it off. I'll listen and I'll do whatever I can to cheer you up. You mean the world to me, and I can't lose you. I just cant" y/n cupped John's cheek and pecked his lips softly. The pair lay in bed for many hours, unsure on what to do. But one thing they knew was certain. They were in this together, and if that meant spending all day laying in bed together, then that's what they'll do