With A New You

𝘊𝘏𝘈𝘗𝘛𝘌𝘙 𝘍𝘐𝘍𝘛𝘠-𝘕𝘐𝘕𝘌

𝑇𝐻𝐼𝑅𝐷 𝑃𝐸𝑅𝑆𝑂𝑁 𝑃𝑂𝑉

       "You don't have to talk if you're not ready. There's also no need to tell me everything in one session. It's about making you feel comfortable and move at the pace you prefer." Hiromi Higuruma calmly tells Sukuna. He has well kept dark brown hair and has a very professional aura around him. He is the man that Uraume said that Sukuna can trust.

     "My boyfriend wants me to be here." Sukuna has already decided he doesn't like him even if he has a very confidential agreement with Uraume so that Sukuna can talk to this guy and not have to worry about outsiders being involved. Higuruma is very familiar with having criminal or criminal-like patients.

      "Do you want to be here?"

      "If I wanted to be here I would have fucking said that." Sukuna grumbles. He doesn't want to be here, he wants to be with Megumi but instead he has to do this. "My boyfriend and I fight a lot. It wasn't like this in the beginning but he just makes me so pissed. He does stupid shit and ends up hurt."

      "Seems like a difficult situation. I would appreciate if you'd elaborate a little more about his decisions, why they make you angry with him when, from what you had said, he is the one who ends up hurt." Higuruma questions, not one ounce of judgement coming from him. He takes his job seriously, he wants to understand Sukuna and learn more about him and his situation involving this boyfriend.

       "He has a friend that I don't trust. It was so obvious that he had feelings for Megumi that it was ridiculous he didn't notice. I don't want a bastard like that around my boyfriend with thoughts like that." Sukuna explains the best he can, already getting a little irritable thinking about it. Higuruma nods slowly, making sure to take down important notes. "Megumi didn't fucking listen when I told him to drop that bastard."

       Higuruma sets his pen down, looking at Sukuna curiously. "Do you think he should do what you say? There's a different between wanting someone to hear you and wanting someone to obey you. Which category do you think you fall more into? It's alright to be honest, there's no judgement here."

      "Both. I know what's best for him." Sukuna firmly answers. Higuruma already feels he's getting an idea of the situation. Sukuna is a person who is used to having control in his life but now another person has entered his life, his world, his domain, and he doesn't know how to handle it because this person has their own thoughts and actions that he can't control. "If he listened to me we wouldn't be fighting."

      "Do you believe that? All couples have disagreements, that part is normal. How these disagreements are handled is what's most important. This friend of your boyfriend's—"

      "Okkotsu."

     "Okkotsu, what do you know about this friend? Is he a good friend to your boyfriend, does he behave in an abnormal way?"

       "He's too kind to him. Too affectionate and always right fucking there." Sukuna hates that he always pops up at the right time and Megumi either says it's a coincidence or that he called him.

      "If he was unkind and insensitive towards your significant other, would that makes you feel better?" Higuruma wonders, observing Sukuna as he considers this.

      "No, I'd end up beating him. I won't let anyone treat Megumi that way."

      "I see, it's good to be so attentive to what makes your significant other happy or sad. I assume that you treat him really well?"

      "Sometimes. Always, I'd say." Sukuna shrugs. There's a silence for a moment; Higuruma doesn't believe he's telling the full truth. Sukuna takes a deep sigh, "I hurt him too."

      "Hurt him how?" Higuruma inquires.

       "I've slapped him, strangled him, I get real rough so he always has all kinds of marks, and I've raped him more than once." Sukuna confesses, watching the therapist for signs or judgement or ridicule. He doesn't want to sit in a session and just be ridiculed for his bad actions. "We went on vacation for his competition. There was a situation." Sukuna explains everything about the arguments, Okkotsu, even mentioning Gojo, how Megumi didn't want to believe it, and the situation with the towel dropping.

       "That sounds like a lot to happen there. Let's talk more about it, what happened after you saw the compromising incident?"

       "He chased after me, explaining that it was a major misunderstanding, he sounded extremely distressed but I didn't care. I grabbed him by his throat and slammed him against the wall, hurting him. He couldn't breathe, he was so terrified, and I just wanted to keep squeezing." Sukuna admits, remembering the fear in Megumi's ethereal eyes as tears welled up. The expression was so beautiful, if Sukuna wasn't so enraged he would've been extremely turned on and taken him right there in the hallway. 

     "What would you have done if, hypothetically, you did kill him? Do you think you'd feel remorse?" 

        Sukuna wonders how he would've reacted. "I'm a really twisted guy." He huffs a laugh, in disbelief at the dark thoughts he just had. "I would have done some horrific things, I probably would've killed that bastard as well, and in the end I would've killed myself too."

       "Horrific things?"

       "To Megumi."

       "I see. You mention you would've killed yourself, why is that?"

        "A life without Megumi isn't worth living." Sukuna genuinely answers. The therapist continues to note down what he finds important. "I didn't know I could love anyone, let alone as much as this. I love him, love isn't even a strong enough word for how much I love him. I want to possess him, I want to be inside him and keep him close to me like that, I want to make him the happiest person in the world but I also want to make him miserable. It's always between those two conflicting emotions, it's one or the other."

       "Those whose parents were abusive or unstable are likely to develop abnormal patterns of attachment which can cause them to be controlling, obsessive, or fearful in their relationships. This sounds like you have an unhealthy attachment to Megumi which is causing your obsession, this could explain why you feel certain drastic emotions." Higuruma suggests, noticing that Sukuna isn't taking it too seriously. 

        "What? Like an obsessive love disorder or something?" Sukuna rolls his eyes.

         "Obsessive love disorder isn't classified as a mental condition, at least not currently. There are other such conditions that are similar and can tie together. Some people have a constant need for validation, obsessively keeping in contact, behaving in a controlling manner, feeling extreme jealousy of platonic and familial relationships your partner might have, feeling overly protective, being so overwhelmed with emotions towards your partner that it disrupts daily functioning, refusing to engage in social activities that don't involve the subject of your affection, feelings of low self-esteem, especially when it seems that your love is not being reciprocated, extreme possessiveness of your partner's time, space, and attention, feeling the need to control the actions and behaviors of your partner... do you think some of these apply to you? Depending on the person, these can vary." Higuruma wonders if Sukuna understands that he has a problem and does need help. That is the first and most important step in helping move forward. 

        "It does." Sukuna clenches his jaw. Even now, all he can think about is Megumi and wonder what he's doing. 

       "Honesty is important, I appreciate you being honest. Why don't you continue telling me about the incident, what happened after you strangled him?"