He Lost And He Found (Depressed Bakugou)

Chapter 58

Recap

[...]Todoroki felt sick.

He grabbed Bakugou by the collar and with as much disgust as possible he yelled his name trying to finaly stop that sickening laugh. He pressed him harder against the counter ultimately choking him slightly.

[...]Bakugou's have been pulled away by Shinso and Kaminari still screaming.

[...]It was then that Aizawa wondered if he did had favourites.[...]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was currently 5:37 am on a monday school morning. School starts at 8:45 am. He has a bit more than 3 hours to get ready. 3 hours and 8 min- now 7 minutes. 

Bakugou still doesn't know if he's really going. 

He looks outside. It was still dark and foggy. Perfectly matching his mood. Taking a morning stroll to clear his head, which still felt fuzzy at times, he had to pinch himself to stay in that reality. 

He was quiet. Really quiet when he went out to go on his walk, yet Aizawa managed to notice him and walked with him. His eyebags seemingly larger than before.

"I saw what happened yesterday. Care to explain?"

"That bastart didn't mind his own bussiness and got what was coming for him." Bakugou shrugged. Practically over night his mental health worsenend rapidly. It was concerning. 

Of course Aizawa wasn't buying it. "And why did you beat him up?"

"He fucking deserved it." Bakugou did in fact not thought of Todoroki, rather of his mother. He remembered the feeling of helplessnes and isolation. The physical pain. He came accustomed to it. The loneliness at last. Whenever he felt down, back in his patterns when it was worse. The lonliness was there to keep him company. It was wrapping around him letting the cold become familiar. It never dissapointed him.

"Why do you think you need to prove yourselve to Todoroki?" Aizawa asked casual. As if he weren't hinting that he knew Bakugou didn't meant to beat up Todoroki, but someone else.

Bakugou glared at his teacher. "Don't know what you're talking about."

He wanted to run. He didn't wanted Aizawa to find out. He hated how observing his teacher was. If anyone would find out about his homelife he would be doomed. It would be his worst fucking nightmare. No one can ever find out about that.

"You asked him why you were not good enough for him. That means you have the feeling to prove yourself to him. So please answer?" Aizawa spoke calm putting as little pressure on Bakugou as possible. While still asking head on.

"Must have misheard." Why couldn't Aizawa just drop it.

"Bakugou I didn't and you know it." Aizawa needed Bakugou to cooperate. If he doesn't he would need to have him expelled at worst. He would definetly have Bakugou suspended for some time. Longer if he didn't tell him what was going on with him. He didn't wanted to have Bakugou leave the campus. The villains have attacked him twice. TWICE. 

"No fucking hell. I didn't remember saying such shit!" He really didn't remember. He believes Aizawa, it would be more than possible, but in the end he can't remember what he had yelled at that bastard. 

They walked in silence for some time after that. From time to time Aizawa tried to figure out what exactly lead to the incident, however, Bakugou stayed stubborn.

"Bakugou please, help me out on this one. I can't help you without your help. You brought Todoroki to the hospital I have to tell your parents and the best I can do for you would be a few weeks of suspension. Endeavour wants you to be expelled. So help me out on this one here." 

Bakugou looked down. He couldn't go back home. If he got suspended or expelled he would be dead. He wouldn't be worth one penny for his mother. He was about to answer truthfully when it suddenly dawned on him. 

He opened up to way too many fucking people.

First Aizawa then Shinso, Momo, Denki, Monoma so many people that are going to leave him. That are going to hurt him. That are going to betray and destroy him. It will happen that's for sure.

What is he going to do? He has to tell Aizawa shit. He can't get expelled. What should he do? Why does he has to be such an idiot. If he could simply hold in his shitty temper, if he weren't this damn weak than none of this would have happened. What the hell is he supposed to do?! 

"He fucking choked me. I-" Bakugou looked aside taking a shaky breath. He can't believe he is telling him that. "I saw red. I thought I was back there." Bakugou paused. He felt humiliated, weak. He hated it. "With the league. I didn't wanted to hurt that bastard he just fucking triggered me that's all. I swear." What he didn't do just to be able to stay at this god forsaken school.

"Bakugou thank you. I appreciate it. I will see what I can do for you." If it were for Aizawa he would have send Bakugou straight to a therapist, but he knew Bakugou wouldn't want one. After all he was offered one from the police after his kidnapping and he made sure to recline in the rudest way possible. 

"I will have to speak with nezu now. Please go back to the dorms and try to get some rest. School doesn't start until a few hours and you look rather tired." Bakugou glared at Aizawa. 

Aizawa took his leave. With fast steps he made it to Nezu's office. Strangely enough that rat always seems to be in his office no matter what time you go there.

"Nezu. You may already know of Todoroki's condition and I am sure you know that it was Bakugou. We need to take action and give him the punishment he deserves for harming another student."

"Mr. Aizawa you are right, but it seems to me you are rather in denial. Or else Bakugou would have been already expelled, you are not one to hesitate in that matter. So why are you hesitating now?"

Aizawa didn't liked how perceptive that rat was. He figured everything out in a matter of a few hours. Probably seconds. 

"I want you to consider that Todoroki provoked Bakugou, who" he hesitated to reveal his ptsd. Bakugou would hate it, but it's the only thing that will keep him in this school for now." suffers from untreated ptsd  from the kidnapping."  He felt as if he was humiliating Bakugou. 

"Oh is that so? Wasn't he offered a therapist, but he refused saying he was fine?" 

"That is true, yet he had told me that Todoroki had triggered him, by choking him, which is a concerning behaviour as well." 

"True true, so what do you mean should happen with Bakugou?"

"House arrest and extra dutys in the dormitories."

"Wouldn't that be to light of a punishment. If we give him that the other students may think we favor him or they start to believe that UA doesn't care if a student almost kills another one. It  would be bad for the reputation amongst the parents. No he needs to know that what he did is not taken lightly here at UA."

"I understand, but if you go with that logic Todoroki also needs to know that what he did was unacceptable." Aizawa gave it his all to not raise his voice.

"He will be suspended three weeks. He will be send home for that time. And Todoroki should be fine. We can not be punishing a victim now can we?"

Aizawa's eye  twitched. Was he serious? Bakugou is also a victim in this matter. You could even argue that it was self defense. 

"Nezu with all due respect, but Todoroki choked Bakugou and you are willing to let it slide? Bakugou is also a victim." Aizawa bit his tongue and took deep breaths.

"I see. What consequences do you see fit for Todoroki's wrong doings?" 

"House arrest and extra chores for three weeks after his recovery."

"Alright if that is settled please find mister Bakugou and inform him that he will go home imediately."

Aizawa simply nodds before leaving Nezu's office. Sometime he really hated that rat. He never knew what was going on in the head of his. He sighs. 

Now to Bakugou.