Dark night of the soul

Chapter 63

Jessica's POV
It came to my baby's feeding time. I get escorted to a room in my wheelchair and the nurse takes him out of the incubator. He has oxygen tubes connected to his nose helping him breathe. My poor baby.
I take out my boob and he doesn't do anything at first. "Why is he rejecting?" I ask the nurse. "Well he is premature so it may take a moment for him to realise but he will take your breast don't worry about it" she explains. I try again and he takes my boob.
I feel a tugging sensation which hurts a bit.
When he's finished I spend a few minutes hugging and kissing him, getting to know my baby. I examine his face wondering what to call him.
I'm deciding between Kaleb, Carter, Jacob and Kai.
The nurse comes back in and tells me that I need to go back to my room because the baby needs to rest. She puts him back in the incubator and she wheels me back into the room.
Sarah has paid for a private room so she can stay with me as long as she wants.
"Baby you can go home you don't need to stay here with me, I'll be asleep soon, I'm absolutely exhausted" I say. "I don't want to leave you sweetie" she says.
She asks me what I'm thinking about naming my boy. "Well I'm thinking about Jacob, Kaleb, Kai or Carter" I say. "Awe I like Kai" she says.
"So do I! so it's decided I'm going to name him Kai."
I smile. Baby Kai. He's perfect.