The Marauder Girls (Book 1)

Chapter 14

Jade's POV

After D.A.D.A I want to walk up to Remus but I don't know what to say to him. Damn it. I've made things too awkward haven't I? I make me hate myself more and more everyday.

I decide to ignore the butterflies in my stomach and my awfully annoying brain and go talk to him. Before I say anything I lace my fingers through his. He looks at me but doesn't say anything. I don't think either of us wants to say anything. I know I don't and Remus is one of the most awkward people I know so I'm pretty sure he's not planning on saying a word.

Finally I just start talking. "So, Remus. What did you think of the lesson today?" of course that's what I say. I never say the right thing. But he doesn't seem to notice or care as he replies. "It was alright. What did you think?" I shrug and say "Well, it was... um... Oh who am I kidding, I wasn't paying attention through that entire lesson."

Remus gives a slight chuckle. "Of course you weren't. I saw you passing notes with Eve. What were you two even talking about?" I didn't want to tell him that it was him or that it was Eve and Sirius so I just played it off. "Oh nothing really." I could tell he didn't believe me. He's always been smarter than that.

But he didn't say so or ask any further questions which made me feel both relieved and nervous. "I just feel bad that I got Eve kicked out of class. I wish I would've taken some notes to give her but I didn't even take notes for myself." I was still nervous but not because of the lie anymore. It was just because I was with Remus and I still wasn't sure if I actually liked him or if I created this in my head so I couldn't hurt him. Once again, me making myself hate me. I am good at that aren't I?

"I could give you my notes to copy if you'd like." "Okay, I promise I'll give them right back." I say. For some odd reason I feel bad about it.

I don't know why because I always borrowed his notes. I guess it's just because I don't know if I actually like him this way and now I feel like I'm just using him. I'm not of course but that doesn't keep me from feeling that way.

"Don't worry about it. Give them back whenever. Like normal." I was so glad that Remus still felt normal about it. He was always so good at keeping things normal and okay. "So, did you see Eve?" I ask him. I needed to talk to someone that didn't make my heart race and my stomach have butterflies.

"No, did you?" I shake my head. I wonder where she is. Probably with Sirius. I know she likes him. She might not want to admit it to me but she probably won't even admit it to herself. "I bet she's off playing love bird with Sirius."

Remus chuckles. "I swear, they are the realist fake couple I've ever seen." I chuckle too. "I know right? They sure are taking this seriously." "I know. They just need to admit that they love each other and date for real. It's kind of getting ridiculous." I laugh. I guess I'm not the only one who sees it.

"So, has Sirius said anything to you about it?" Remus shakes his head. "No. But Padfoot never likes to share his feelings. If he said anything about it at all I bet he said something to Prongs." I nod. "Has Eve said anything to you about it?" I laugh.

"I think she's in denial. I keep saying that she likes him and she says that it's just pretend. I can't get her to say otherwise." Remus nods. "Maybe she doesn't want to say otherwise because she doesn't know how Padfoot feels." I look at him confused.

"What would that have to do with anything?" "Well, if she does in fact like him maybe she won't say so because she doesn't want to be embarrassed if he doesn't feel the same. So, if she says she doesn't then she safe from any embarrassment." I think about that for a moment. I guess he's right.

I shove him. "Stop it." I say. He looks at me and says while chuckling "Stop what?" I smile and say "Being so intelligent. Seriously, sometimes it's scary." He laughs at my joke.

He really was quite intelligent though. He always knew the answer to anything and I couldn't recall a time he was ever wrong.

I on the other hand wasn't so intelligent. I always had to work for good grades while Remus was just naturally good at anything remotely academic.

I let go of his hand and wrap my arm around his waist. He sees what I'm doing and instinctively puts his arm around my shoulders. I grab his dangling hand with both of my hands and don't let go. And we just walk to our next class like that, me feeling better about us than I ever thought I could have.