Imagine If You Assembled The Avengers: Volume 2

Happy Birthday, Steve (Rogers/Avengers x reader)

After Happy Birthday, Buck (also in this book)

"Look at him, Sam," you nodded towards Steve, "have you ever seen someone so bummed out by their own birthday?"

Sam stood at your side, the two of you almost uncomfortably wedged in the kitchen doorway that overlooked the living room of your Wakandan home. It wasn't meager by any means, but it wasn't a good environment to lend itself to privacy either, and Steve had failed miserably to find any in the spot he had chosen to sulk in. "No one likes to get older, (Y/N)," he answered quietly, "and he's only got one year left before he hits the century mark. You saw how low Barnes got when he reached triple digits."

"That was only because we ruined his cake. What's Cap's excuse?"

"Hmm," Sam paused, bringing his hand to his chin as he thought it over, "well, maybe he's still a virgin. That would sure kill my vibe if I hadn't hit it by 100."

"Oh my god, Sam, that isn't it."

"You sure?"

"What? Do you want me to ask?" you laughed, shocked at the insinuation. "No thank you."

"Hey, Cap!"

"No, Sam! Shut up!" You pushed up on your toes, trying and failing to clap your hand over his mouth before he could make an ass out of the both of you, but he dodged and turned, evading your every attempt. "Sam, don't!"

"Yeah?" Steve turned to face you. His look of despondency was wiped away for a moment as he watched the two of you struggling, actually laughing genuinely at the sight of how miserably you were failing. Even though he had come here to find a spot to wallow in self-pity, he appreciated your efforts to drag him out of the hole he had dug for himself; despite your efforts, he knew that he was far too heavy to lift from it.

"(Y/N) wants to know if you're still a virgin!"

"Son of a bitch, Wilson," you groaned, "why do I even talk to you?" Your posture faltered and slumped, embarrassed that he had actually said that to Steve, but more so that Steve thought that it was your idea. "Steve, I'm sorry. I'm not the one who brought it up. That was Asshat over here. I really don't care if you're a virgin or not."

"Well, if you have to know-"

"No! I don't," you answered quickly. "Really, all good." Turning away from your Captain just to make the point as clear as possible, you took Sam's arm in your hand with a pinch of his skin that made him wince, shoving him back into the kitchen and out of sight. "You're such a jerk! Just once, can you open your mouth and not make trouble?"

"But I'm booooored," he whimpered, "we've been here for over a year now."

You opened you mouth to argue when it struck you, the same exact answer that you had given Clint only a few weeks before when he had whined about it first; it was as plain as day, and you had missed it completely. "That's it! He's bored."

"No, I said that I'm bored. You need to listen."

"Sam, I heard you. You said that we've been here over a year." You turned slowly on your heel, back towards where Steve had gone back to his uncharacteristic sulk, chewing on your thumbnail anxiously as your mind ran through options of how to help the guy. None of you had really planned anything for his birthday because he had asked you all not to, but with the look on his face and the broken slump of his posture making your heart ache, you decided that this was one order that you weren't about to follow. "I've got it!"

"Pfft, you don't got it," Sam scoffed in disbelief with a dismissive wave of his hand. "Just bake him a cake like you did for Frosty and get him on a sugar high. Problem solved." He quickly exited to leave you in the room alone, which may have been just the impetus needed for you to get your plan underway. With one more quick glance out towards Steve, just to be sure that he wasn't looking to move any time soon, you hurried out from the other side of the kitchen to search for the one item you needed to make this whole thing work.