Changed For The Better

Facetimed

It was the next afternoon and I was sat on FaceTime with Ryan. We'd been talking for ages because his family, ugh it's weird saying that, but his family were out for the day running errands so he had the house to himself for a bit.

"So Luke is taking you skating? That's cool I wish I was there to meet him and go with you"

"Not like skateboarding. It will be like skate night remember?"

"How could I forget? That was one of the best nights of my life"

"Tee and Sasha gate crashed"

"Yeah I know that, but it was still the first proper date we had together. And I still really enjoyed it, wish I could go back"

"Same. Life was so much easier back then. We didn't know it at the time of course, but I suppose life only ever gets harder"

"That means it's all downhill now. Things will only get more difficult"

"I guess that's what they mean by 'growing pains'"

"Anyway, let's talk about something more positive"

"Yeah. How's life with your family?" I asked.

"It's, ok."

"Sounds brilliant(!). Come on, what's happening?"

"Well like I said before, I'm settling down but I'm finding it hard to make this place feel like home"

"When do you start school again?"

"The week after next. You?"

"I'm the same. I'm sure once you have the morning school rush, you'll all start functioning as a proper family again"

"Yeah I hope so. Specially since Chloe will need a lot more of my help when we go to back to school. It's so different now, I just hope we settle in quickly and without making a fuss"

"Oh come on Ryan, there's always a fuss when there's a new kid"

"Anyway enough about school and what's happening in the future, what about now. Have you been writing any new songs recently?"

"I did write one actually"

"Can I hear it?"

"No"

"Why not? Is it not finished?"

"No it is finished I just...I'm saving it."

"Why?"

"I don't know. It's personal and people might hear me singing it and then they'll know what's going on and...I just...I'm not ready for it to be listened to"

"Not even for me to listen to it"

"I'm sorry Ryan, but not even you"

Ryan's POV

Marie has never said I can't hear a song because it's too personal before. I know in the past it's taken a while for her to open up to me about certain things but, well, I thought we were over that.

Being a distance away shouldn't make that much difference surely? Specially since it's a song. Singing and writing songs is her hobby, no it's her passion! It's the thing she loves doing and the thing she uses to vent her emotions. But even though she has vented them into this song she can't bring herself to let me hear it?

It makes me worry about her. It really does because she must have so much in her mind and so much going on that she doesn't want people to know about. Specially if a song about it is apparently too much to share. If too much can fir into one song, how much could she be holding in her head?

Marie's POV

Ryan was clearly disappointed when I said I didn't want to show him my song. It's personal is the thing. I know I've sang personal stuff before, like that time in assembly, but I just don't want him to hear this one.

Not because it's bad, but because I don't want him to feel guilty about leaving and blame himself for all the conflict that's going on inside my head. It isn't his fault, he just can't help me now. Not now that he's mikes beyond my reach.

"Ok. Well, that's a shame" he said. "But what else have you been up to? Not getting in trouble I hope?"

"Well, you know me. I play by my own rules"

"Marie just be straight with me. What have you done?"

"Fine. I threw the ketchup bomb on Luke, filled his shoes with custard..."

"Marie..."

"What? It's a few harmless practical jokes. It's fine"

"Harmless? How expensive were his shoes?"

"Very cheap by the looks of them"

"Marie stop this. No more jokes and no more misbehaving. Please?"

"Fine. I'll behave"

"You promise?"

"I promise"

----------

"Do I have to go?" I asked as I stopped at the door of the minivan. Everyone was piling in, ready to go to the skate thingy with Luke.

"Yes Marie. Everyone else is going and this is my treat"

"Oh but, Luke I'm...I'm not feeling well" I said holding my stomach. "I think I might be sick..."

"Yeah yeah nice try Marie. But you're coming on this trip wether you like it or not. Besides, what kit refuses a night out?"

"More like a nightmare"

"Get into the minivan. You'll only make things worse if you make everyone late"

I sighed and did as I was told. There's clearly no way for me to get out of this. I climbed in and sat towards the back. This is when I noticed Mai Lee was coming which is weird. I thought she was staying behind.

The journey wasn't too long. Everyone else was buzzing. Candi was even dressed in pink neon clothing that will probably glow in the dark or something. She, along with Sasha and Kazima all had that glitter down the side of their faces too. It's like they're on a hen night or something!

Jody isn't going glittery, but she does look stunning. She's in some nice jeans and a sparkling black top with a nice jacket to match. She's got her hair up and has actually put makeup on. Then there's me. Looking like a potato all alone in the backseat. This is really gonna suck. The worst part is, I though I'd get away with pulling a sickie so I don't even have my phone on me so I can't text Ryan.

This really is going to be a long night. Everyone is acting as though they're on top of the world and that nothing better has ever happened. What's wrong with them all?

And everyone loves Luke too. Honestly, I consider this bribery. He takes us out on a trip to try and win us over which is working on the others, but it won't work on me. I can see through that. I, unlike everybody else apparently, was not born yesterday. And I, unlike the others, do have a brain along with a mind of my own.

Luke isn't going to win me round by pretending he understands me or by getting us all a night out. For all we know he could be planning some evil scheme to get us shut down or run out of money and that's why he's getting us all out of the house.

And I'm not going to pretend to be happy for the sake of everyone else tonight. If I'm not happy, I won't pretend to be. This is gonna suck. And it's gonna be bad. But I'm just gonna try and get through tonight, then I can crawl into bed and wake up tomorrow and pretend that none of it ever happened.