Changed For The Better

Mean Girls

After getting inside we put our onesies on and joined the others for movie night. As usual we shared a blanket and sat in our unassigned assigned places on the sofa. It was weird having Carmen and Tee back, and you could tell they got to choose the film, which I guess is fair.

They chose Mean Girls. Possibly the worst film to ever exist ever. It's just some petty girls trying to unrealistically get one over on each other. It's actually painful to watch. Even the jokes aren't funny any more.

Feeling uncomfortable, I awkwardly and slowly ate some popcorn, trying to draw as little attention to myself as possible. This film, is nothing like what I would want to see. This film will only ever be seen again in my nightmares. And honestly it's worse than some of them.

The only good thing was that I was with Ryan. We were cuddled up close to each other, enjoying each other's warmth and the softness of the onesies. Sometimes they're kind of choking but tonight it was just right.

We endured the final few scenes of the film, and when the credits began to roll accompanied by the cringey backing track, I released a sigh of relief that I had no idea I was holding in. The lights came on, and we all squinted and groaned, and turned to face Luke who was by the switch.

"Ow turn it off" moaned Carmen.

"Come on you lot, up to bed now please"

"But it's only just gone nine" I complained.

"Yes but you have school the day after tomorrow"

"So why can't we stay up tonight?"

"Because Sasha, you need to get back into a routine. Trust me, you'll thank me later"

"Sure I will" she stated sarcastically.

"Off you go, all of you, now please"

We all groaned again but did as he said. There was no use arguing. I'm just surprised that Tee and Carmen went up. They didn't have to. It is t like they're heading off to school in a couple of days is it?

Actually how long are they here? Because the sooner they go the better. They're making Ryan uncomfortable and it's so weird having them here again. It's like they don't belong here any more. They no longer fit in.

"Today was amazing" I said to Ryan and we walked into our room. "Apart from the film"

"I agree. I actually thought I was going to be sick at one point"

"Same here, how do people watch that crap?"

"It's beyond me. I much prefer horror films" he smirked.

"Very funny" I said. I was standing by the mirror, sorting myself out before bed. I couldn't really see very much, but it was worth a shot.

He came up behind me and snaked his arms around my waist, then rested his head in my shoulder. I leant into him and held onto his arms.

"This is nice" I said, kind of ruining the moment.

"It is" Ryan said, spinning me round. "But not as nice as this" he leaned in and our clips collided. How long has it been? I don't know. I'd forgotten how amazing this feels. Like a million tiny fireworks are going off inside of me, and loads of ants are running up my spine, sending shivers all through my body. Is it normal to still be excited after this much time?

"Wow" Ryan said as he pulled away. "Does it always feel like that?"

"It does for me" I replied breathlessly with a smile. "You're the best" I whispered.

"No you're the best"

"No you are"

"And so on" he said with a laugh. "Come on, let's go to bed. Don't want Luke walking in"

"Okay. But tomorrow we make the most of it"

"Of what?"

"Our last day of freedom. And I'm making the plans this time"

"Bit short notice isn't it?"

"I'll think of something" I said as I released him and went to my bed.

"Okay, I look forward to it. But even if you can't, I'm sure we'll still have a really good day"

"I hope so"

"I know so"

----------

I woke up when the door opened and Luke came running in, crashing a wooden spoon against a pan.

"Come on you lot time to wake up!"

I rolled over and looked at the clock. "Luke, why are you waking me up at seven in the morning?" I asked as I sat up. He stopped banging the pan.

"I'm preparing you for school tomorrow"

"Ugh why did you have to remind me?" I whined a I lay back down again, only to hear him aggressively banging the pan. "Alright alright I'm up" I said, sitting up again.

"Ryan isn't!" He yelled, still not stopping. I angrily got up out of bed and yanked the wooden spoon off him before throwing it into the corridor. "I'll get Ryan up. You can go and disturb someone else"

He looked at Ryan, who was somehow still asleep, smiled at me, then walked out like nothing had ever happened, closing the door behind him. "Idiot" I muttered under my breath.

I looked back to Ryan. I feel bad for disturbing him, but at the same time if I don't I'll only gave Luke to deal with. And he's already given me a headache and I've only been up two minutes!

I went and sat on Ryan's bed next to him, and started shaking his shoulder. "Ryan? Ryyyyan?"

He stirred a little. "Ryan we have to get up"

"What time is it?" He murmured.

"Not going to lie, its early" I replied.

"How early?" He asked, opening his eyes fully to look at me, still lying down.

"I'd say about five past seven?"

"Why are we awake now?"

"Luke woke us up making a racket involving a frying pan. He says he's trying to start our routine so we need to go down for breakfast. Come on"

"But I don't want too"

"Neither do I but we have to so let's go"

I dragged him out of the bed, much to his disapproval. At least Mike would have let us have one final lie in before school starts again, rather than trying to get us int of routine or whatever.

Like seriously Luke, the only way we will ever be in routine is when school has actually started again and we have the pressure of getting there on time. Today we just have extra time to kill which is going to suck because it could have been spent sleeping.

At least I have more time now to think of something to do with Ryan today. It's actually a lot of pressure. He's so good at doing this, what will he think if I totally mess it up? He'll think I'm an idiot that's what he'll think.

We reached the kitchen snidely weren't the last Ines there for once. The toast was still hot and the smell of freshly cooked bacon lingered in the air. I guess this is a sort of end of summer treat from Mai Lee.

I mean it's a good idea, since for the next eight weeks straight all we will have time for is cereal and toast, and that's on a good day. Neither of those things I actually like that much so breakfast kind of sucks for me.

We sat down beside each other and each made a make do bacon sand which. I managed to spill ketchup all down myself in the process, which was oh so hilarious obviously (!)

After breakfast we basically both got dressed then found ourselves sitting in the lounge with not a lot to do. Most of the others were still having breakfast, and I'm not sure where everyone was really.

It's days like these that I hate. Days where we can't even entertain ourselves, let alone entertain each other. Ryan was sat beside me playing games on his phone, and I was trying really hard to think of something for us to do today. I feel like such a let down.

Why does he even date me? Like I'm not much of a catch really. I'm just annoying and clingy and scared of everything. I don't really know what it is that I bring to the table when it comes to dating, but whatever it is, Ryan must like it.