Changed For The Better

Catchup

(A/N: I'm so sorry this was ready to go up yesterday but I simply forgot to press publish....I'm such a fail sometimes xxx)

Ring Ring...Ring Ring...Ring...

I sprinted across the room, dived onto my bed and answered facetime on my phone. It was Ryan, well obviously, I mean who else would it be. The screen buffered as it tried to connect. I know that the wifi here is alright, I have full bars, but it was never great at the dumping ground. Specially when you were using a phone and not the laptop...which was also pretty awful.

It finally loaded. I haven't spoken to Ryan since when we texted this morning and for some reason, I kind of didn't miss it. don't get me wrong, I was lonely today. But unlike the last time we were separated I haven't felt like I'm missing him too much.

I do miss him, but I don't eel upset about it. I don't really notice it to be honest. I actually feel good living here, maybe better than I ever did at the dumping ground. I need him still, and I love him still and I want to be near him, but what I'm saying is that I haven't been sitting and thinking of him all day. I've actually been enjoying myself, and been excited about baking.

The screen finally loaded and Ryan was there, sitting on his bed and wearing a big oversized hoodie. His hair was messy, as though he had just taken the hood down. He smiled at me as soon as it loaded, so I guess it loaded for him at the exact same time.

"Oh my gosh hi!" I said excitedly and I sorted myself out so that I was sitting properly on my bed.

"Hey. Sorry I missed you call earlier. Luke made us all do this stupid upcycling thing today so I was stuck doing that"

"What the hell is upcycling?"

"It's basically just turning old stuff into new stuff which you can use again but for something else"

"How is that different to recycling?"

"I have no idea. It was stupid though because it was meant to be a competition, but then he said it was a draw, and the prizes were these weird little kit things where you make cars out of potatoes or something"

"What?" I laughed.

"I don't even know" he smirked, shaking his head. "Anyway, what have you been up to today? The first full day in your new house. How's it been?"

"It's been really good actually. Mike has been working all day and on the phone in the office so I have barely seen him, but Agatha and I did some baking. We made these cool cupcakes that had sprinkles in them and on them and they were really tasty. I'll send you a photo...actually there's no point you can try one tomorrow!"

"What's going on tomorrow?" he asked.

"Oh yeah I never got the chance to talk to you. Basically, I asked Mike and Agatha said they are happy for you to come over whenever, and they said it is fine for you to come over for dinner tomorrow, if you want"

"Of course! I would love to see your new house and meet Agatha properly, and definitely try one of the cupcakes!"

"Yay! They were a bit of a flop, but Agatha is literally the baking goddess. She is also knitting me a blanket of a quilt or something which is cool. Specially since my room is freezing"

"Wait she is making you a blanket?"

"Yeah I know. I only moved in yesterday but they have made me feel so welcome. I have gotten to know Agatha better, she is like...I don't know, she's really nice. It's like a real family. Literally, this morning Mike was reading the paper whilst Agatha was making us a cooked breakfast. They didn't even wake me up or anything, they let me sleep in."

"Sounds...amazing" he hesitated slightly. Oh no, I hope it doesn't look like I was showing off. I was just excited.

"Sorry" I said. "I didn't mean to go on"

"Nah it's alright. You have the right to be happy, you deserve it"

"Yeah but I don't want to make you feel bad"

"You aren't, it's fine. Anyway, so tomorrow after school is that the plan?"

"Yeah"

"And how are you coping, after yesterday?"

"I'm actually okay. for a while, I guess I forgot about it. I know that sounds bad, but I still remember it and I still think about it. You know I still think it's completely my fault, but I also know that there is nothing for me to do about it now"

"That's true. I the to say it, but what happened has happened, and all that we can do now is try and get over it"

"I don't think I'll ever be over it. I have to live the rest of my life knowing that somebody else died, like, somebody else's life ended because of me. I have to carry that around on my shoulders"

"I still don't blame you, and I hate to think it, but Harley cared about you a lot. I'm sure wherever he is now, he is anting you to be happy and move on with your life"

"I feel like that is what everybody always says, like, in films and stuff when somebody dies"

"Maybe because it is true. But let's not dwell on it. Let's carry on with life and think about the future. You have moved out and are with a new family, I'm turning sixteen soon so I might not be sticking round the dumping ground for much longer either. We both have our option choices to make, you know it just seems like life is suddenly moving fast and the future is happening. We are moving into the next stage of our lives so quickly"

"I know what you mean. Like we have literally been waiting in the boring stages for ages. Like the simply going to school and coming home phase has been going on forever, like for as long as I know life has just been a dull routine of getting up, going out and coming home. Nothing ever happened, and now everything is happening all at once"

"Yes that's exactly it! And the worst part is that you aren't here with me to go through it"

"I'm still going to be here with you through it Ryan, just, it will have to be over the phone rather than face to face every day. But don't worry, you will see me al the time anyway. We'll see each other all week anyway"

"Yeah I know. I still miss you though"

"I miss you too, but I'm having fun talking to you. And I'll see you tomorrow too"

"I know. How are you getting school?"

"I don't know but I'll ask Mike and Agatha over dinner. It probably is okay to walk, it isn't that far away"

"It's like an extra twenty minutes from the dumping ground though don't forget"

"True. But like I said, I'll ask them at dinner2

"Wait you haven't had dinner yet?"

"No, didn't you get that the first time I said?"

"Well no I was too busy thinking about you getting to school safely tomorrow"

"I'll be fine Ryan, you don't need to worry about me"

"I know but I still do. I can't help it, the thought of you getting hurt just scares me so much"

"Well, don't worry for me. I'm here, and I always will be"