I can't help but feel myself fading out every day, every minute, every second.
It happens so often that it's not even slow anymore.
It's like a process that starts slow but the closer it gets toward the end, the faster the process gets.
Like a full tank of water, emptying slowly until it gets halfway and everything just rushes through the small tap.
Like time, ticking by slowly when waiting for it to be over until it's at least thirty minutes off and it goes faster.
That's what this feeling of fading feels like.
You know it's happening, you can tell.
But you just can't do anything.
I'm zoning out more often.
I'm sadder now.
I can feel it.
I can see it.
I'm smiling less.
When will they see it?
When will they feel it?
Why don't they know yet?
I'm fading, and there's nothing I can do.
I'm fading, and this time nobody can help me.
(December 01, 2017)
