I'm trying to lay my head down more gently
I'm trying to read the letter which you sent me
I'm trying my best be more silent
Although my thoughts are still angry and rather violent
I try new things like playing guitar
Maybe piano and even art
I try many things to keep me from crying
That even my hands are desperately trying
They wipe and they dab
They rub till I'm sore
They scratch and they grab
They wrup and they claw
I try to find things to make it all better
Material things and sometimes a letter
A handful of pills and one at a time
The slower the process the longer I'm fine
I try to find things to make it okay
I pray and I pray, make the pain go away
But God rarely hears me my speech is too silent
My thoughts are still angry and they are still violent
It's doesn't matter what I do and not what I say
My efforts are futile to keep it at bay
I am already deadly insane
It's time you stop trying and I'll do the same
We've been here quite long
We can't end the pain
If you do try that now
It would all be in vain
