Rampaige

[42] No excuses

"Paige, what the hell happened?" AJ grabbed my arm and pulled me to the side as I totally lost it once we arrived in the hotel. Thank god I held it in til now, I don't want anybody to see me like this. I'm an idiot.

I shook my head, "N-not r-right now." I stuttered as I dropped my stuff onto the bed and collapsed next to it. I tugged the thick blanket against my chest and face, muffling the horrible whines escaping my mouth.

AJ sat on the bed next to me and rubbed her cold hand against my arm. "Alright well I'm here and I'm ready to listen when you're ready." She reassured me.

I don't know how or why but AJ always has had a soothing presence. She's always managed to help me feel a little better whenever things are rough. If I didn't have her, I would be completely lost.

I think I cried all of the tears out of me during the past few hours. I pulled myself out of the soaking blankets that I had created. AJ glanced up at me from her book and quickly muffled her laugh. "Don't laugh at me!" I furrowed my brows and covered my face.

"I'm s-sorry," She burst out in laughter, "Go look at your reflection." She choked out. I glared at her and wiped the remaining tears from my cheeks. My fingers turned black from all the running makeup. That's why she's laughing. My entire face has got to be black by now.

After cleaning myself up and regaining some of my sanity I think I need to get the rest off of my chest. It's not going to make the situation better but it'll help clear my mind.

"I told him I love him." I began. AJ's smile completely dropped as she put aside her book and came to sit next to me. Her cold hand wrapped around mine as she stroked my hand with her thumb. "He um, he told me that I can't love him... It's not even that, it's just the expression on his face when I said it. He went from so happy to totally bummed out in seconds... I wish I could take it back, it can't be over already." I sighed.

AJ remained quiet for a while, even she doesn't really know how to react to it. But somehow just by her being here helped ease my mind a bit. "I'm sorry, Paige. I uh, I don't know exactly what to say to make you feel better but tomorrow I'm devoting my day to you and we'll watch chick flicks and eat lots of icecream." She forced out a smile. I couldn't help but smile a little bit too. It's crazy how the two of us ended up being so close.

The night passed by surprisingly quickly, the exhaustion took over before the emotions could. I haven't slept that well in a long, long time. But now it's morning and I can't escape my mind that's going to haunt me throughout the day.

I pulled myself out of bed and into the shower. Not only am I suffering from an emotional pain but also a physical pain. Every movement brought an awful burning pain into my shoulder and neck. I had almost forgot about my
injured shoulder. Great.

Payback is tomorrow and I can't sit around and whine about yesterday. I have toughen up and fight the pain, today is a mega gym day. No excuses.

AJ and I pulled into the training center parking lot that was surprisingly empty except for a few cars which are probably other superstars preparing for tomorrow.

"I promised you a day of girly things, not busting our asses." AJ continued whining. "Suck it up." I groaned as I slammed the car door behind me. AJ shouted something from inside the car but I couldn't hear her.

Cardio was the easiest part of it, hardly any necessary upper body movement so no pain in my shoulder but once it came down to the weights it was nearly impossible.

I dropped the dumbbell to the ground letting out a wince of pain. I glanced up to see the other few superstars eyeing me, "Sorry." I mouthed, realizing that my blasting music muted the loud bang of all the weights I continued to slam against the concrete.

Then my eyes locked on the icy blue eyes of Dean and I felt my stomach tie in a knot. He took a few steps in my direction but quickly thought against it, ripping at his sweaty tangle of hair. I sighed and dropped my eyes to the floor.

"Can we uh, train in the ring?" I mumbled to AJ. She smiled, "If you let me win then of course!" She joked before skipping toward the training ring. "In your dreams." I shouted before following her, quickly removing Dean from my mind.

Our match quickly escalated from a harmless headlock fest into an aggressive and competitive match. We're both super competitive and want to be the best so I expected it to get physical, but not like this.

One grab to the shoulder and AJ pinned my arm against my back. I found myself whining in pain as an excruciating feeling burned through my right arm. Despite my yelps for her to release her hold she didn't, and I felt myself fading quickly from the pain.

"Oh my god I'm so sorry." AJ finally released her hold, seconds before I would have passed out. I rolled to my side gripping my arm tightly. "You bitch." I hissed. Her arms quickly helped me get to my feet but that didn't help rid any of the pain. "I'm so sorry, I got caught up in the moment." She apologized, sounding as if she were nearly on the verge of tears.

I sighed before rolling out of the ring. "It's fine, I just need to walk off the pain. I'll be back in a minute." I shouted before rushing towards the exit of the building. The anger began to build up inside of me, anger towards myself, towards AJ, and even towards Dean. Basically anything that could go wrong has went wrong.

Just before I made it to the exit I accidentally bumped shoulders with a large body. I kept my eyes locked on the ground, afraid that I'd look up and see the familiar face that I'm always running into.

Just the atmosphere made it clear who I had bumped into and it's not somebody I want to talk to right now. "Sorry." I mumbled before squeezing out of the doorway.

The door slammed shut right behind me but a few seconds later it slammed shut once more. He's following me. I stopped in my place and turned around to see Dean a few steps behind. "Not right now, please." I begged, feeling my cheeks start to burn.

He didn't say anything but instead he grabbed my arm and pulled me to the side of the parking lot. "You don't have to say anything, just listen." He began. I ran my hand through my hair and nodded. "You can't l-, you know, have those feelings for me." Was all he could get out before his anger kicked in and he began to pace back and forth.

"It's not that easy, Dean. I can't just stop it. It doesn't work like that." I argued.

His eyes darted towards mine, almost in an angry glare. I couldn't even keep eye contact with him, this whole situation is so awkward and weird. "You have to try to get rid of those feelings." He said quietly, trying to hold his anger in.

I shook my head, feeling my eyes ready to pour out the water works any second. "I can't. I fucking love you and that's it." I angrily shouted only to quickly cover my mouth and lock my eyes on the pavement. Dean remained quiet and I don't think I want to see the look on his face.

But before he could even bring himself to react I felt the tears begin to drip down my cheeks and there's no way I want him to see me break down.

I tried to make a swift escape but his
hand locked on my wrist. "Paige." He nearly whined. I yanked my arm from his grasp and quickly jogged towards my car.