Second oneshot book

It'S So CoLd wHy Am I fInNiSh? ( Stendyle ((South Park.)).)

This is the one where they make Stan short, right? THIS IS! OH MY FUCKING GOD FINALLY—. Also this is just straight up about memes though. Shut up, meme lives matter.
Warnings: Cursing and kinda sexual content... somewhere.
Ages: 16.
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Stan's POV.

"I swear to god, I will never be a house wife," Wendy says, walking into my room.

"What?" I ask.

"We had the bake sale remember?" Wendy asks.

I nod.

"I just realised that I fucking gave one of those people something with raw egg in it. Oh die of salmonella see if I care," Wendy says.

I laugh. Kyle walks in next, sighing.

"What did you do?" I ask.

"W-Why did you assume that I did-?" He asks.

"It's across your face. What happened?" I ask.

"So I made the worst joke ever," he says.

"Couldn't have been that bad," Wendy says with a sigh.

"Yes it could! I straight up walked up to someone who doesn't know Hamilton and—," Kyle says.

"Oh shit this is going to—," Wendy says.

"Long story short, I got a real life smack in the face for a non-serious pickup line," Kyle says.

"What was the pickup line then?" I ask.

"Excuse me miss I know it's not funny—," Kyle starts.

"Oh Lord," Wendy sighs.

"Still doesn't beat the time I ran into a wall because I was keeping eye contact with this seriously attractive guy and he smiled at me and I was like 'do I go, do I not go?' This is what I get for being pansexual, cute girls leave me speechless, cute guys make me walk into walls and cute non-binary people make me stutter to hell and back," Kyle says.

"Why is that? I mean, you're a good looking guy. If you came up to me, I would go 'fuck yes. Wendy, do we have space for poly relationship'," I say.

Wendy nods.

"Me too if I'm being honest," Wendy says.

I'm already having bisexual distress when I'm in the middle of these two. Like, WHY THE FUCK IS EVERYONE HOT? And then there is my short ass like 'hey, you have to lean down to kiss me if you're even slightly taller than the average girl'.

"What pick up lines can you make out of Hamilton?" Wendy suddenly lets out.

"I think your pants look hot," Kyle says.

"I'm bisexual and I'm really fucking confused. That does not mean my sexuality is confusion, I just don't know what the fuck is happening," I say.

"We just thought what good pick up lines you can make out of Dear Evan Hansen and then suddenly switched to Hamilton," Wendy says.

"You switched to Hamilton!" Kyle says.

"I mean if you want one, look into your eyes and the sky's the limit," I say.