If Our Love Is Wrong

Fourteen

Beatriz

I don't know what's happening. I don't have any idea why she's crying. Everything were fine naman when I left a while ago and that was only minutes ago kaya my heart almost jumped outside my chest when I realized that Jho is crying through the phone.

Napatigil pa ako sa pagdadrive and I carefully put my attention on my phone. Hindi siya nagsasalita and puro sobs lang niya ang naririnig ko.

When I realized that I wouldn't get an answer from her, even a little hint or what, I immediately drove back to her place. Not even caring if I would get in trouble for coming home really late with short notice later.

What's happening, Jho?

Hindi ko kasi mapigilan ang sarili ko not to worry because I was just with her minutes ago. Okay naman siya nung umalis ako, then why is she crying now? Something bad surely happened and that idea really freaks me out.

What if ganto--what if ganyan... Fuck!

Pagdating ko sa unit niya, she immediately opened the door on the second knock.

There, I saw Jho looking like a total mess with all the tears on her cheeks. Her eyes are starting to swell from the non-stop crying.

"Anong nangyari?" mahinahon kong tanong, but full of urgency.

But she just stared at me. More tears fell as second goes by.

"Jho." pagsasalita ko ulit. I'm getting more worried and I think hindi ko na alam ang gagawin ko if she remains like this.

Yumuko siya at pinunasan ang kanyang pisngi.

"Hindi ka na dapat pumunta dito eh. Naaabala lang kita." humihikbi niyang sabi.

"Jho..."

Mas lalo siyang umiyak though she's trying her best to control herself. "Pasensya na talaga sa abala Bea dapat hindi na kita tinawagan eh. Ayaw kasi sumagot ni Jaja tapos---"

"Jho naman." Lumapit ako sa kanya at hinawakan siya sa braso. "Look at me." Nag-aalinlangan niyang iniangat ang mukha niya. "Do I look like I'm complaining?"

Tumitig lang siya sakin ng deretso at hindi nagsalita.

"No. Kaya you don't need to explain, okay?" I tucked the side of her hair behind her ears. "Now, I want you to tell me why you're crying. Can you do that for me, Jho?"

She bit her lower lip at biglang umiwas ng tingin sakin.

I waited for her to say something but she remained quiet.

"Jho, ano ba'ng nangyari?" Hinimas ko ang kanyang braso. "Hindi ako mapapakali unless you tell me the reason kung bakit ka umiiyak ng ganto. Kung may nangyari mang masama please tell me now kasi nag aalala na talaga ako eh. Hindi ko na alam ang ga---"

Nagulat na lang ako ng bigla siyang yumakap sa akin ng sobrang higpit at ibinaon ang kanyang mukha sa dibdib ko. Umiiyak na naman siya.

"Bea..."

Medyo nagulat ako sa nangyari kaya hindi pa ako kaagad nakareact. But when I gathered myself, I found my self carressing the back of her hair.

"I'm here." I whispered comfortly. "I'm just here."

"Pwede bang..." hirap niyang pag uumpisa. The front of my shirt is getting wet from her tears. "Pwede bang dito ka muna kahit 'di ko masabi? Pwede ba yon?"

Napabuntong hininga ako. Ano ba talagang nangyari?

I really want to know. I badly want to know. Pero hindi ko naman siya mapipilit sabihin sakin especially kung ganto ang situation niya ngayon.