If Our Love Is Wrong

Twenty Seven

Beatriz

"Huy!"

I almost jumped on my seat when Cel shouted right in front of my face. Napabalik ako sa reyalidad at sinamaan siya ng tingin.

"God. What's your problem?" I grimly said then I took a bite of my burger na kanina ko pa hawak at muntik ko ng makalimutan kainin.

Nagtawanan yung dalawang asungot na nasa harap ko. Mas lalo ko tuloy silang sinamaan ng tingin.

"Eh you..." tinuro ako ni Maki gamit yung hawak niyang fork. "what's your problem?"

Agad kumunot ang noo ko.

"Kanina ka pa tulala at wala sa sarili. Dinatnan ka naming ganyan pagbalik namin ng resort this morning. Nakarating na lang tayong Manila ganon ka pa rin." Maki said.

Napailing ako. "I'm just... tired."

"Tired? But you doesn't look tired. More like, problematic." Cel said while eyeing me.

I snorted. "Problematic?"

"Like parang bitbit mo lahat ng problema ng mundo. Ganong level."

I rolled my eyes. "Tigilan niyo 'ko."

"Come on Bei! You can tell us naman if may problema ka." Diretso akong tinitigan ni Maki. "Ano ba'ng nangyari kagabi?"

Napatigil ako bigla sa pagnguya ng kinakain ko at nakipagtitigan ako sa kanya.

May nangyari.... and I think it was the most beautiful thing that ever happened in my whole damn life.

I know I'm stupid and even a jerk for saying this, but wala talaga akong pinagsisihan sa mga nangyari. Alam ko naman mali talaga. But I just couldn't feel or even find any hint of regret. I know I shouldn't have done that. Pero kasi at that moment I know it was right... I know it was the right thing to do. My morals be damned I don't care.

Wala akong pinagsisisihan.

But imbis na sabihin yon out loud, napaiwas lang ako ng tingin sa kanilang dalawa. "Nothing." matipid kong sagot.

Pinanliitan ako ng mata ni Cel. "You were with Jhoana the whole night."

"And then?" hindi ko makatinging tanong.

"I don't know. Malay ko kung anong ginawa niyo or kung anong pinag usapan niyo for you to be so problematic right now."

Nagkunyari akong busy sa kinakain ko at hindi na sila pinansin.

"Hay nako Bea." pagsasalita na naman ni Maki. "It didn't went well 'no? Sabi naman kasi sayo wag mo na muna kausapin yung tao. Hayaan mo muna gawin yung gusto. Tsaka mo na lang lapitan ulit kapag okay na siya. But you were so kulit eh."

Napabuntong hininga ako tsaka binitawan yung hawak kong burger at sumandal sa upuan.

"We talked... and I think it went pretty well naman." pag amin ko.

"Then why are you so out of yourself if it went well?" Cel asked.

Pinaglaruan ng kamay ko yung straw ng iced tea tsaka nagsalita. "It went well not until..." Itinaas ko ang tingin sa kanilang dalawa. "Something happened."

Parehas silang napakunot ng noo. Kinabahan ako bigla. Shit. Am I really telling them about... fuck. Fuuuuck.

"What exactly?" curious na tanong ni Maki.

Napayuko ako. "Something."

"Something... what?"

"Basta."