When the Stars Align (Anthony Rizzo)

43| Stay

Anthony

I sit with Kelsey in my arms as we lay out on a couch in the hospital. Her family was spread out in the family room fast asleep as we wait for an update on Isaiah, Kelsey and I were the only ones still up. It was about 3 am but we hadn't got a wink of sleep. She couldn't sleep if she tried and I couldn't let her destroy herself while I was out so I stayed up with her. The police officers were out trying to figure out the documentation part of this whole situation. They didn't want to take the kids to a detention center. They're from Chicago and even though they're a immigrant family this is their home and they shouldn't be taken away. I talked to them and I promised that if there was anything, and I mean anything I could do to help, that I would do it.

But it was imminent that their dad probably wouldn't be here much longer. He wouldn't leave to talk to the police because he wanted to stay with his son. But once Isaiah gets better I don't know what's going to happen. I don't see him staying, I really don't. I don't want him to leave but in the end the law is the law, even if this situation is a bit different.

I can easily tell this has been especially hard on Kelsey. I can tell she's trying so hard to make sure her family is going to be okay, but she's not so sure they will be. I promised to do everything I can to make sure she stays and I was going to do just that. No matter what I was keeping her in my arms and her family by my side. I was my best when they were with me and I wasn't going to let them slip out of my grasp.

"You know, we can go get married right now and you can stay no matter what. I mean we were going to get married eventually, so why not do it now? Then you don't have to worry about finding documentation and you can focus on helping your family" I suggest.

"And what happens to my family when I'm documented and they're not" she asks.

"I'm.. I'm not sure. I just can't lose you" I insist.

She turns around in my arms and rests her head on my chest. She moves in as close as she can as she wraps her fingers around the back of my neck. I close my eyes trying to remember as much of this as possible.

"I do want to marry you Anthony, but not like this. I want Isaiah to be there in a cute little suit walking down the isle carrying the rings, not with a tube down his throat laying in a bed unconscious. I want my sister to be smiling that beautiful smile of hers, not crying because she worked her ass off to get into a college and she doesn't know if she'll ever make it there. I want Trevor to know he hasn't failed this family, not once in his life. And I want my dad to know he belongs here, not staying here illegally because some decided that a piece of paper tells you where home is.

I can't marry you for legal status. That's why my mom and dad never married, it would have never been for the right reason. And I can't base my marriage off of laws that were made to cheat the system. I can't do that" she promises.

"I can't lose you" I whisper. She looks up at me and gives me a small smile. Her eyes as glassy as I've ever seen them. She doesn't like to cry, up until the other day I've never seen her cry. And I could easily go the rest of my life without seeing that happen again.

"You'll never lose me. I will fight for you for every second of every day. I love my family but I love you too. My family means the world to me, and you're my sky. I need both of you guys by my side. As soon as Isaiah gets better we'll figure this all out. But right now the status isn't important. It's making sure my brother keeps fighting for his life and that he is able to continue to chase his dreams once he walks out those doors" she insists.

"Are you scared" I ask and she freezes. I see her eyes start to water and her breathing picks up.

"I'm terrified. One of the reasons I love space so much is because there's no expectations, no limits to what life is like out there. It just exists, it's just there. The purpose is to keep us wondering and it will never fail at that. But down here the unknown isn't beautiful and mysterious, it's scary and ugly. I would rather be with the unknown up there than down here, you know? At least up there if I don't know then nothing changes, whereas down here everything changes" she explains.

"I'm so sorry this happened to you guys. You're my most favorite people in this world, and you all belong here with us in Chicago. I wish people would see that" I insist.

"The people who need to do, but sometimes that's not enough" she admits.

"Promise me you're not going to leave" I beg. I see a tear fall but I quickly catch it.

"I can't-" she starts.

"You can" I insist.

"When we first started dating this was exactly what I was trying to prevent. Part of me always knew this moment was more than possible, it was almost inevitable. But I still fell in love with you because that was even more inevitable. I just didn't want to hurt you, I didn't want you to get attached and me not know where I was going to end up. I don't know if I can promise that I'll always be here" she defends.

"You can. You know why? Because you are strong, you are smart, and you are brave. People like you come around once in a lifetime. I know it, your dad knows it, your mom knew it too. I can tell by the way I see she looks at you in the pictures. You can be the one to save your family and I know you can. I just want to be the one who helps you along the way and makes sure you stay" I explain.

"I'm right here" she whispers.

"For how long" I wonder.

"For however long our forever will be" she promises.

Eventually she falls asleep but I stay up. I think about what I can do to help her out in this situation. Where I can look for their documentations and how I can make this easier for them. I know hope is a bit hard to come by in these situations. You get this feeling in your chest that you're helpless, that there's nothing you can do to make a difference. But a wise star loving woman told me no one can do everything, but everyone can do something.

And I had to do something.