When the Stars Align (Anthony Rizzo)

46| Find Peace

Kelsey

I stand frozen in the middle of the airport with my family crowded around me. My siblings all silently cry as they tell their father goodbye for a while. It's hard because non of us ever knew a life without him in it, and not so deep down we always hoped that they wouldn't catch him and that he could stay with us forever. He belongs here, with us, and no one can convince me otherwise. If home is where the heart is... then why does he have to go? But my belief in fate isn't enough to keep him here. There wasn't a thing I could do to keep him here because if he didn't leave then he would be taken away anyway. At least this way I can say goodbye. He's not being ripped away from us and being sent to a detention or anything like that. He's just going home, even if this was his home too.

Eventually he walks over to me and he stops. He knows I'm not happy, he knows that I want him here with us more than anything. And he knows how much I love him, that's why this was so hard.

"Do you have to go" I ask softly. I knew the answer but I didn't want to believe it.

"I do. You know if I didn't have to I wouldn't. There isn't anywhere else in this world that could be better than being here with this family. I would never leave you given the option. But god has plans for me, plans that I don't yet understand but I hope one day soon I will. And you'll be there too because no plans of mine would ever be complete without you" he promises.

"What am I supposed to do without you" I sniffle. He wipes a tear from my cheek before holding my face.

"You are going to be just fine without me. There isn't a damn thing in this world you aren't capable of learning, of experiencing. And you don't need anyone else to do it. You're so so strong. Stronger than you even know. I know your heart wants me, but you're going to be fine" he assures me.

"I'm gonna miss you so much" I whisper. He rests his forehead on mine and I close my eyes.

"I'm gonna miss you more than the sun misses the moon. But the sun has to die every night in order for the moon to rise, and so I have to go away for you to shine. That's the way it has to go. But that doesn't mean I won't miss you like crazy. That doesn't make this any easier" he says.

"Please don't leave" I beg.

"I'm not leaving. I'm going to see you again, not too far from now. I'm going to make sure of it. Anthony is going to take good care of you, he's going to make sure that anything you'll need you'll have. And when you need me most I'll be right there in your heart making sure you're doing the right thing. I'll never let you fall" he promises.

He softly kisses my head and looks into my eyes. He had been crying too and it made his situation that much harder. While I always assumed something would happen and he would be caught, I never imagined it being this hard. I always thought he would be taken from me, but instead he's being ripped out of my heart and thrown away.

It was different with my mom, I knew she was gone. I never expected her to come back. She wouldn't be out there in the world living a life without me and me without her. I know she's watching over me. Knowing that my dad can and should be around, it sucks. But there wasn't much I could do about it. He wasn't meant to stay, I knew it. It was way past time that he went home, he could be with his family once again and show them all the pictures of this beautiful life he made after 30 years in the states.

Finally I let him go and he gets on the plane. He takes off out of my life and I couldn't stop the tears from falling. Anthony held me in his arms as I let it all out.

"I'm so sorry" he whispers into my ear. I let out a long sigh as I turn around in his arms so I was being held like a baby. I rest my head on his chest as he just holds me

"Can we go somewhere" I ask.

"Of course baby. Where do you want to go" he asks.

"Somewhere far away from here" I insist.

"I think I know where to go" he admits.

He pulls me out of the airport and into our car. My family heads back home and Anthony takes me wherever he wanted to go. I honestly didn't care at this point. I just couldn't be in that place anymore, I wanted nothing to do with it. With much of anything really. Not even the stars made me feel better, and that's saying something.

We drive and drive until I frankly didn't know where we were anymore. I don't think we were anywhere honestly. But Anthony pulls off to the side of the road and stops the car. He reaches in the back and pulls out a blanket.

"What are we doing" I finally ask.

"We're going to watch your favorite movie, the stars" he insists.

I smile even though I wasn't in the mood to look at stars. But this was really sweet and really thoughtful so I wanted to go through with it. So I follow him into the back seat and he opens up the sun roof. It was the end of January so it was still pretty cold, too cold to sit out on top of the car. So we sit in the back and look through the sun roof. It was a surprisingly clear night and we were so far away from anything that you could see everything.

"Why did you bring us here? What's so special about it" I wonder.

"Being here with you is what makes this place so special" he claims. I smile up to him as he stares down at me. I give him a quick kiss to assure him that this meant the world to me.

I look back up to the sky and I see a shooting star fly by. I let a small gasp as I watch it disappear into the darkness.

"What do you wish for" Anthony asks and I sigh. I lay back down as I think about it for a while. I try to write the words I want to say in the stars to make my constellations.

"I wish for peace" I say.

"Not for your mom back or for your dad to stay. Just peace" he wonders.

"Yeah. Because with peace I know that all is well, and it'll always be well. If I'm at peace then no matter what I'll be okay. That's why I want peace" I say.

"I hope I can give you peace" he says and I smile.

"You give me that and so much more" I promise.