When the Stars Align (Anthony Rizzo)

36| What A Girl Wants

Anthony

Once December hits Chicago, so does the cold. I mean "wear some coats and gloves and hats and some hand warmers" cold. And while the weather isn't the best the feeling on the skin, on the inside our little home we were feeling pretty great. I loved Christmas time, and this is the first year I get to spend Christmas in Chicago so I was going to go all out. Florida is great but I've never had a white Christmas, or even a cool one at that. Everywhere you look you see Christmas stuff and I'm happy I actually get to experience it.

So Kelsey and I go out and pick out a bunch of Christmas stuff to put up around the apartment, more things than what we could ever do with. Then we run back to the apartment to put it all up and take a bunch of pictures. So she works on hanging up lights around the place to give it that festive feel and I set up the tree by the window for the best view in the city. We play Christmas music and mess around trying to get as much done as possible.

"What do you want for Christmas" I wonder out loud. I make sure everything is where it's supposed to be so we can light up the tree.

"For you not to get me anything" she claims and I peak my head around the Christmas tree.

"Seriously" I ask and she just smiles.

"Why do you want to get me something? We're together and we're happy, what more do we need" she asks.

"Christmas isn't about getting what you need, it's about getting what you want. So what do you want" I ask again.

"I don't want anything" she repeats.

"Everyone wants something" I insist.

"I don't. Because wanting something makes me feel awful. To want something so bad and not get it, that hurts. Like I want my mom but I know I won't have her again. I want people to change but I know they won't. So I stopped wanting things, either I accept my life with out without things and I move on" she explains.

"You don't have to live like that anymore. It's okay to want something and risk not getting it. You wouldn't give up on a dream because it unobtainable, why give up on wanting something" I wonder.

"Because I'll always have my dreams, I can just close my eyes and I can see my dreams any time I want to. But asking for something is like opening up my eyes and it not being there. It's that feeling for wanting something to be different but knowing that no matter what you do, it won't be. I'm a blessed girl. I have everything I need, and it's because there isn't much I want. All I want is your love, your mind, and your time. And I have that, that's all I need" she insists.

"But if you could have one thing, what would it be" I questions. She stops to think before smiling once again.

"I do miss my old telescope. It wasn't all that nice but it got the job done. I liked being so close to the stars and planets, I felt like if I reached out my hands I could touch them. That was pretty cool" she admits.

"See. That wasn't so bad" I tease.

"Yeah. I guess not. I'm just still pretty sheltered I guess. I don't want to get hurt even though there isn't much I can do to stop that from happening" she shrugs.

"I can. I'm going to do everything to stop that from happening" I insist.

"And I love that about you. But this life can be mean, trust me, I've seen it. My friend wasn't drunk when she was killed by a drunk driver. My mom wasn't smoking when she was killed by a fire. MLK wasn't protesting when he was shot and killed. This is the world and we live in it. We might have a say in a few things but dark matter is everywhere. It's quiet, it's invisible, and it's inexplicable. The best was can do is be there for each other when the bad stuff happens, not trying to prevent it" she says.

"I just want to make you happy" I beg. She gets down from the chair and walks over to where I was. She wraps her arms around my neck and pulls me into a big hug.

"Oh sweetie, you make me the happiest person on this earth. I wouldn't change a single thing about you" she promises.

"Good. Now how about you finish up with the lights then help me with the tree" I suggest.

"Sounds like a plan" she agrees.

So she hangs up the rest of the decorations before joining me with the tree. We add the blue and white ornaments we picked up along with some personalized ones like a Cubs one and one of the moon. Once it looked nice and symmetrical we light it up. It really made it feel like Christmas in here and that made me excited.

"I want you to put the angel at the top" I insist as I hand it to her.

"Why me" she wonders.

"Because you're my angel watching over making sure I'm doing good for myself and for everyone around me. So it makes sense if you put her up there" I explain. She just nods as she stands up on a chair to reach the top. I help her down and we take a step back to look at all we've done.

"I think we did a good job" she insists.

"I think so too. Lets take a picture and send them to our friends and family to make them jealous" I say as she starts to giggle.

"That sounds like a good plan" I insist.

So we take pictures and send them off. I wasn't big into social media but I was proud of what we did and so I upload a picture of it anyway. She didn't have social media but I let all my followers know that everything since we met eight months ago this wasn't possible without her. I've posted pictures with her and she's been around me for the longest time but they don't know her name or what she does. Just that I'm happy with her and I couldn't be happier.

We change into our pj's for the night and cuddle up in the couch. The 25 days of Christmas was underway so we find a Christmas movie to watch and sip on some hot chocolate. I sit here with my arm around her and I couldn't help but stare. She was always so beautiful and I'm so thankful she's mine. I'm truly the luckiest guy in the world and I hope she knows that she's the reason why.