miracle boys

17

it had been a week since the appointment. calum refused to have an abortion, and went ahead and let both doctors go into him and try to fix the position of the fetus. since they gave him some pain medicine, he didnt have to feel anything being moved around inside of him and that made calum feel better.

ashton and calum didnt talk after the appointment, and calum could definitely feel his heart breaking more with each day that went on, knowing ashton still hadn't changed his mind. he couldn't understand why ashton felt the way he did. well, he could.

calum understood how much he meant to ashton. hell, ashton meant so much to him, and the thought of losing ashton...

calum couldnt bare the thought. so he knew what ashton was feeling. but he also wanted ashton to be happy for them. they were bringing life into the world.

something that could most likely never happen, happened to them. calum felt like he had been blessed again and again. he only wanted ashton to feel the same.

again, he knew ashton would come around, after some time. they both needed more time to just think about everything going on. they both needed time apart to hope for the best.

_

when ashton finds calum a couple days later, the said boy is standing in front of the mirror, no shirt on, and he's crying.

"calum, baby? what's wrong?" ashton asks, walking over to calum, who's trembling.

"im fat!" calum cries, and places both his hands onto his growing stomach.

"hey, you arent fat," ashton says, moving behind calum, "you've got a baby growing in there, sweets. you want the baby to grow, and to be healthy, right?"

"y-yeah," calum hiccups, feeling something warm start to grow from the bottom of his stomach when ashton places his hands on top of his stomach.

"okay, sweets. you're going to grow as the baby grows, and once you have the baby guess what? most of that pretty little tummy of yours will go back to normal."

"you think so?"

"what do you think happens to mothers all the time? after they have the baby, the stomach deflates, and im not too certain on how all that works since i've never even learned about that, but i know you'll still have a little baby fat and you better keep it, calum hood, or else."

"or else what?" calum asks, trying not to giggle since ashton was making him more happy.

"or else im just gonna have to put the weight on you myself."

"i'd like to see you try," calum says, turning around so he's leaning against ashtons chest.

"i bet," ashton whispers, hugging the boy softly, "you've been taking your estrogen, right?"

calum nods. ashton thinks calums mood swings are most likely from the baby, and from the estrogen, so he's quick to get use to all the ever going mood changes.

"why dont we go get some ice cream, what do you say?" ashton asks, pulling back so he could wipe at calums cheeks.

"can we go to ice cream land? please? they have the best ice cream," calum says hopefully, smiling at ashton.

"of course! now go get a shirt on, sweets."

calum runs out of the room, happy as he can be since he was gonna get the best ice cream in town!

_

"thanks for this, ash," calum says, taking the last bite of his ice cream.

"no problem, calum. i love you," ashton mumbles, smiling softly at his boyfriend.

"i love you too?"

"can we...," ashton trails off, "can we talk, for a second?"

"sure, what's it about?"

"the pregnancy."

"look, ashton, if you're gonna-"

"no, just hear me out, okay?" ashton sighs, taking a deep breath, "you know i love you. i love you so much more then any words can describe. i...i cant lose you. of course, im happy. if there was anyone i would want to start a family with, it would be you. it's just scary to hear about all the things that could happen, and the survival rate of you both, it just makes me so nervous, so anxious. if i knew you would survive, along with the baby, i would definitely feel more at ease. but...the fact that something could go wrong at any time, and i could lose you both, i just..."

"hey, i get it," calum whispers, laying his hand on ashtons cheek.

"you dont get it, though. i have, and will continue, to protect you with my life. i cant do that, when it's your own body that can turn on you at any moment...look, what im saying is - im so happy. the fact that we're gonna have a baby, its amazing. just like the doctor said, it's a miracle. im just so scared about what could happen. the thought of losing you crosses my head more than ever, now."

"you won't lose me, ashton."

"don't make a promise you can't keep, calum."

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oop -
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