I Blame Me (Tododeku) [Completed]

61 ~ Shit!

Midoriya's POV

Just like the weather had predicted, it started raining on me as I was walking to the grave. I continued walking, a little water never hurt anyone, right? The sound of rain accompanied me all the way grave, never once letting up. I didn't grab a bucket, as cleaning the head stone while it was raining seemed silly. I knelled down, looking at the Marble stone, my mother's name carved into it.

"Hey mom. I brought some steamed meat buns for you. I know it's raining, but I wanted to come visit, hope you don't mind." I paused for a minute, almost like I was waiting for a response. I sighed, setting down the plastic package of white buns. "I know you won't like this, but I lied to Kacchan. I told him Todoroki would be coming with me, so he no longer needed to. I feel kinda bad now, lying like that. How are you? Happy? I hope you are. I really miss you. And I regret leaving your side that day. But I'm coming, so don't worry alright?" I sighed again, knowing I wouldn't get an answer. "I'm heading out now, love you mom." I kissed the head stone, grabbing the steamed meat buns before walking away from the grave.

I walked to the park that Kacchan and I used to play at, throwing away the meat buns in one of the garbage cans on the way there. Walking through the woods near by, I found the river roaring from the rain. I went to a near by tree, gently uncovering a small box I had put there soon after mom's funeral. I popped it open, finding numerous old notes and a bloody razor. I grabbed the razor, using my nail to pick off some of the dried blood. I took off the coat Mic let me barrow, as I sat down in the mud. I rolled my red sleeves up, unwrapping the bandages. I stared at my arms, the white, pink, and red lines reminding me just how long I had been doing this. I looked at the razor, my heart fighting my mind.

"Shut up." I mumbled, pushing all feelings and thoughts away, leaving nothing but a shell. I twirled the small blade in between my fingers, feeling as it cut without much pressure. I stopped, catching it between my fore finger and my thumb. I shifted the razor just a bit, pushing onto my arm and pulling it along my skin. The slight catch of my skin on the blade, only making the pain more desirable. I continued digging deep slits into my arms, completely unaware of the people slowly piecing together exactly what was going on.

Todoroki's POV

I sighed. I was laying on my bed, getting bored of scrolling through my social media when I got a text from the one and only Bakugo Katsuki. I clicked on it, knowing that if he was starting the conversation, it was important.

'How's it going with the nerd? You haven't over stepped, have you shit head?'

I read the message over and over. It was passed 11 so Midoriya should have been with him, so why was he asking me how he was doing?

'Why are you asking me? Shouldn't he be with you?'

I responded, completely confused.

'You're saying you aren't with him?'

I wasn't expecting such a quick response from the blonde, but his response was much more unexpected.

'Why would I be? The plan was you two plus Kirishima going to the grave at noon.'

Bakugo responded with a screen shot of what Midoriya had sent him this morning. My heart skipped a beat as I sat up quickly, typing a response.

'He didn't do anything last night. The plan was still on this morning when I asked Mic and Aizawa.'

My knee started bouncing with anxiety as I watched the text bubble appear. I waited as the three dots seemed to last forever, until a ping came and a blue bubble show up.

'If Deku isn't with you and he's not with me, then where the hell is he?'

"Shit!" I yelled, standing up. I didn't hesitate when clicking the call button, running out of my room as Bakugo picked up. "What the hell is going on?" Bakugo questioned, not giving a greeting of any sorts. "He's going to make an attempt on suicide, stupid! I'm going to the grave, you try anywhere you think he'd go. Call me if you find him." I order, running around the house, trying to find anyone. "Shoto? What's wrong?" I heard Fuyumi. I flipped towards the sound of her voice. "Right. I'll get Kiri to contact Aizawa." Bakugo said, before I heard him hang up. "I'm leaving. I might not come back tonight. Tell the old man." I explained before running out the door, slipping my shoes on as I ran.

I clicked on Midoriya's contact, pressing call. I listened as it rang a few times before going to voice message. "Come on! Pick up, Dammit!" I screamed at my phone, trying to contact him again. I continued to call as I ran, eventually using my ice to go faster. The rain whipping against my face and the wind blowing passed my ears loudly, didn't make the tears that were building up in my eyes fall any slower, if anything, making them fall faster. I reached the cemetery, jumping off my ice as I started running again. I looked everywhere for him, not finding him. I could have swore I heard some scream my name as I stopped and flipped around, looking around for anyone. I didn't find anyone, but I did find Midoriya's mom's grave, but Midoriya wasn't there. I quickly bowed, thanking her before running off again. I called Bakugo for the second time, him answer after the second ring. "Did you find him?" Bakugo asked, yelling and breathing heavily.

"No. He's not at the cemetery. Where are you?" I asked, still running. "SHIT! I know where he is! The park, you know, the one with the big cherry tree? He's there!" I could hear as Bakugo started running. "I'll meet you there." I said, hanging up. I felt tears fall down my cheeks at a rapid pace as my non-religious self prayed that Midoriya would be okay and that we weren't too late.

1065 words