Øverturning the lies (a twenty one pilots fanfiction)

~Tyler~

It's been a day. 

One day-and he's back to feeling like this. 

Back among people who are supposed to care, and yet-

They don't seem to care. 

Any of them. 

How? 

How could they be so free? 

It doesn't make sense. 

Josh nudges him gently. "They aren't. Not completely free." 

"Then how-"

"Everyone pretends in some way, Tyler," Josh tells him. 

In a way he can understand that.

It's scary. 

It's scary that no one wears their true emotions, leaving him with a thousand lies and falsehoods to piece together in an attempt to understand . 

So he just watches. 

Right now, he feels so crippled with doubt not even the one thing that he loved is enough to help him off his feet. 

It still gives him some energy.

Not enough. 

Not enough to fill the terrible, terrible emptiness. 

Josh just sits with him. 

He seems to understand and lesat some of what Tyler's one thoughts and feelings and battles are but not all, not enough to understand  that he wants to be alone but doesn't want his fren to leave him all the same. 

He doesn't want Josh to worry. 

He's already amazed that he hasn't left yet. 

A sense of panic crashes through him unexpectedly. 

His hands are shaking as he runs though his hair. Taps his fingers on his legs restlessly, letting his shifting eyes survery the scene in front of him.

"Are you okay, Ty?" Josh asks him.

Tyler just shakes his head. 

"I'm sorry," Josh whispers. 

Tyler leans his head against his fren, taking some comfort in his presence. 

But not enough. 

"Hey," Josh says, looking Tyler directly in the eyes. "I'm proud of you, okay?"

Tyler wishes those words truly affected his heart, made him feel some semblence of happy. 

But they don't. 

Everything around him suddenly seems foreign, alien. 

Wrong. 

And he is painfully aware of how he doesn't fit into any of it. 

He sits up abrubtly. 

"Tyler..." Josh says, "What is it?"

He doesn't know how to put into words what he is feeling. 

Just shrugs. 

"We need you here," Josh says. "I know it doesn't seem like you belong, but we care, all right?" 

"But you don't," Tyler mumbles. 

Josh looks at him sadly. "How can you say that?" 

"Because you don't understand," Tyler says. "You don't understand any of it."