Get You Down

Chapter 29-Impossible

Josh's POV
"Why did you do that?" I asked once Ophelia and Jake left. "And where did you get that shirt?" I added with an eye roll. We had showered together earlier, but I definitely did not give her that shirt. I liked Lauren, but it's becoming increasingly clear that she just wants to start drama.

"What do you mean? She practically jumped me! She's insane!" Lauren said incredulously. Her eyes were wild and her face was still pretty swollen. I was overcome with the urge to kick her out, but it seemed unfair, so I bit my tongue.

"You know what I mean, Lauren," I said in a hushed tone. "You know what, actually...it doesn't even matter. Are you okay?" I asked, trying my best to sound concerned.

"Yeah, I'm fine now," she said, scooting closer to me on the couch. She sat with her back against my chest and pulled my arm around her. I tickled her side then tugged at the bottom of the shirt hem before I leaned in to kiss her neck. She wiggled even closer and lifted the shirt over her head, tossing it to the side.

I caught it and stood up to take mine off. She smiled expectantly. I tossed her my shirt and she laughed thinking I was putting in a show for her. I stopped there, though. "You may want to put that on before you go," I said as I opened the front door. I watched as her face changed from happy to shocked.

"Are you serious?" She asked with a disgusted look on her face. I just waited for her to walk out. She put on my shirt and walked towards me. She stood face to face with me and said, "She's not going to take you back, you know.."

"It doesn't matter, as long as you're gone.." I said flatly, still waiting for her to actually leave. She leaned in as if she wanted to kiss me, but I dodged it. "Please leave," I pleaded. She huffed and crossed her arms as she walked to her car. I felt a smile creep across my face.

I closed the door behind her and sat down on the couch, still holding Ophelia's shirt. Judging by the cuts on Lauren's face, Ophelia was still wearing the ring I gave her. That had to mean something...so I held on to the hope I had that she would forgive me. I didn't deserve it, but she is the most understanding and kind people I've ever met...so it didn't seem impossible.

I quickly cleaned up and put on a Fleetwood Mac album to listen to as I ran through a shower. Ophelia always hummed or sang along when we'd play this record, and I couldn't stop smiling as I thought about her. I miss her terribly, but I know I fucked up royally. She deserves to be happy, and if that's not with me...I understand. Hopefully it's not with Jake, either, but honestly..as long as she's happy, I'll learn to be happy.

After my shower, I brushed my teeth and got ready for bed. I hated laying in here alone. The bed felt too big and too empty without her. I wanted to call her or text her just to let her know I miss her and that I'm sorry, but that wouldn't be enough. I felt tears pooling in the corners of my eyes from thinking that she probably would never forgive me, or even want to speak with me again. I had always ran from commitment at every turn, and maybe I was still scared of it even with Ophelia..maybe that's why I cheated? I promised myself that tomorrow, I'd apologize.

The next morning, I took her shirt to a dry cleaners hoping they could get the blood out. The man at the counter seemed confident, but a little leery of why there was so much blood. I shrugged and hoped he didn't add me to a list or something.

After dropping it off, I walked down the street to kill time. I had a wild thought that I could make Ophelia a gift bag to apologize about everything and to give her shirt back to her. It's probably a dumb idea, but I knew she'd like all the things I planned to include. Plus it made me feel better, a little..

I wandered through all the stores downtown, and finally found everything I needed. I also found a box big enough to hold everything. It took me nearly all day, and I had to rush back to the dry cleaners before they closed. After picking up Ophelia's shirt, which was no longer covered in blood, I brought everything home and spread it all out on my bed to make sure nothing was missing. I got her a copy of The Princess Bride book because it is her favorite movie, a teal bookmark with tiny cartoon cows because she loves teal and cows, a small giraffe figurine because she always joked that she wanted a miniature giraffe, a dog stuffed animal because it looked a lot like a border collie she had as a kid, a journal with wildflower designs on the pages because she loved to write and our first kiss was at the wildflower field, and finally a note I wrote with a drawing of her surrounded by peonies on the back because she's beautiful and loves peonies. I threw in a bottle of tequila for good measure because she probably needed it after everything. I looked over the note one last time to be sure I had included everything I needed to say.