It's Forbidden

Say What?

Aspen was sitting in her room with Natasha and Wanda and she was telling them all the details. She spilled everything. She told them about the date, about her and Bucky reminiscing about the past. About Steve. How she thought he would feel if and when he found out. And Nat and Wanda listened to everything Aspen had to say and wanted to help her figure everything out whatever way they could. They even asked questions to clarify.

"So you went on a date with Bucky. And Steve doesn't know." Wanda asks Aspen. Aspen was worried about getting judgment from them if she told them everything and then she realized she wouldn't. They were her friends. They wouldn't judge her. She trusted them. Which was something hard for Aspen to do. Both her and Bucky. They couldn't trust anyone. But they trusted each other and Steve. And aosen trusted Nat and Wanda. "Yep." Aspen says popping the 'p'.

"you and Bucky are dating but haven't said it out loud yet." Wanda continues. Aspen tilts her head and knits her eyebrows together. "Well..." she starts, but Wanda cuts her off. Knowing whatever was going to come out of her mouth other than 'yes' would be a lie or a shitty attempt at a coverup. "you are. And you're constantly kissing." Wanda says. Aspen daydreams for a moment about her and Bucky's kisses and she smiles. "Yep." She says proudly, she loved kissing him.

She would kiss him forever if she could. And he would kiss her forever if he could. "And you're a virgin." Natasha says sipping her drink. It was hard to believe Aspen was a virgin. She was beautiful, technically over 100 years old, she was dating Bucky, they would think she'd have done it at least once. But she hadn't. She never found the right person. And now that she has, they were waiting for the right time. They wanted it to be special. And as much as Bucky teased about wanting to sleep with Aspen, he wanted to make it special for her. He didn't want her to regret it or for it to be a bad experience. He wanted it to be perfect for her. "Yea that pretty much sums it up." Aspen says.

"you don't think it's gonna blow up in your face if you keep hiding it?" Aspen had thought about this. And she knew it would. Secrets and lies always blew up in peoples faces. But she wasn't ready to tell Steve yet. She needed more time with Bucky before she had to tell Steve and it potentially ruin what they have. Even if telling him doesn't break them up, she wasn't ready for how mad Steve would be at Bucky. She didn't want to come between them. By any means. She wasn't ready for that part of it.

"I don't want to tell him yet. We want to make sure that this Isn't a phase and it's worth telling him." Aspen says. That's partly what it was, but she didn't want to go into full details just yet. She was tired of thinking about it and talking about it. She just wanted Bucky at this point. "Aspen you know this isn't a phase." Natasha says. And she was right.

Aspen chose her words wrong, she didn't mean a phase necessarily but she needed and excuse because she didn't want them to yell at her for thinking it was her fault if Steve got mad at Bucky. Because Bucky was and adult too and could make his own decisions. And he was deciding to be with Aspen knowing what may or may not happen. "you're right. It's not. But we need to get past the honeymoon phase of our relationship Before we tell my brother I'm Dating His best friend." Aspen tells Natasha.

And that was another thing. She didn't want them to tell Steve now why they were still trying to figure out their relationship together. "did you just admit
you're dating him?" Natasha asks. Pointing out something Aspen was hoping they didn't pick up on. She said dating. But her and Bucky, weren't official yet. "Fuck." Aspen whispers under her breath. "it's okay we already knew this anyways Aspen." Wanda says.

"It's not official it's kind of unspoken I don't want to jinx it. With my luck I'd ruin it So can we pretend I didn't say it?" Aspen asks. She was terrified something would happen and she would lose Bucky. She didn't know what she would do without him. She was scared that they jumped into things too fast over listening to other peoples opinions on them, and just the feeling of kissing for the first time.

She didn't want them to be caught up in the bliss of the moment and then open their eyes one day and realize they rushed into it. She didn't feel like that would happen on her end, but she didn't know about Bucky. She didn't want to assume that of him, deep down, she knew he knew exactly what he was doing and wouldn't have rushed anything between them. Especially with having to worry about Steve, but she had trust issues.

But she also knew deep down, that these feelings, didn't just appear. These feelings, were ones that they have had for as long as they could remember, but neither of them were ready to admit it, because neither of them were ready to tell the other the truth about how they felt, the whole truth. That they loved each other, and that they had always loved each other.

Since the moment Bucky and Aspen saw one another, they knew. From their first words to one another, their first glance, first touch, no matter how innocent, they knew. And that was scary to them. Too scary for either of them to want to come clean about it. Not just yet anyways. They were stuck in not wanting to scare each other away. They needed each other. They always had.

"Say what?" Natasha asks Aspen. Going along with Aspen wanting them all to forget about Aspen saying out loud that her and Bucky were dating. "Exactly." Aspen says with a smile.