When the bassist from Mötley Crüe, Nikki Sixx, falls for their stage manager, Bella Mejia, who has to maneuver her way around his life style, and chooses to aid him in getting clean.
"Better turn me loose, better set me free, cause I'm hot, I'm youn...
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NIKKI - "OH WOULD YOU look at the time," Tommy looks at his imaginary watch, "I should really call Heather."
"It's 1 am," Bella says quietly.
"Gotta bounce. See you guys later," and he exits, leaving her and I alone.
"So uhh, you like Jack?" I point at the half way empty bottle of Jack on my nightstand.
"Nikki, if your gonna talk to me can you at least a put some clothes on," she crosses her arms.
"Oh right," I go into the bathroom. I'll figure out how to get this out of my pubes later. I just put some pants on, leave my shirt off and walk out.
"Hey," I smirk.
"Hey," she keeps her cool.
"Can we please stop this?" I ask practically pleading.
"Stop what?" She stays nonchalantly.
"This. I hate being awkward with you, I'm sorry I won't accept help. I know I need it but I just can't handle hurting you again," I look at her with doe eyes.
"I- Sure. I just can't stand seeing you like this," she looks at her feet, "everytime I look at you I just can't help but only feel bad you know," she sighs, "sorry that was too much."
"No no it's fine," my hand rests on top of hers and I move it away.
"But Nikki, I really think you need help," As if she doesn't need help either, I haven't mentioned that she said anything about gagging herself since the day she got blackout drunk, she still has no idea I know.
I told some people while really high to keep an eye on her or something but I think those people were also too high to remember. But I kind of freak out seeing her go to the bathroom, then remember it's a bit creepy.
"Nikki?" She tilts her head concerned.
"Fuck you," I huff. Suddenly anger just grew over me.
"What? Did I say something wrong?" She leans forward.
"I said fuck you! I don't need your help, it didn't do much in the past so imagine now! If you really wanted to help me you wouldn't be with Duff! Or you wouldn't be- you know what just get the fuck out!" I scream at the top of my lungs.
"I'm sorry I didn't mean to push any-" she somehow stays calm but is in shock.
"Yeah yeah, JUST GET THE FUCK OUT I WON'T TELL YOU AGAIN," I grab the bottle of Jack and throw it at the wall. She doesn't even seem fazed.
She stands up and slams the door. I sobered up fast. What have I done? I open the door and run after her. That conversation went the complete opposite way I wanted it to.
"Bella!" She stayed turned around and just flips me off. I catch up to her speed walking, grab her arm tightly, she turns around. She's angry, "I'm sorry."
She finally snaps back, "you don't get to fucking scream at me, tell me to get out and then come after me and just say sorry, what do you want me to do? stay or just leave? Make up your fucking mind Nikki," I just stare at her speechless.
She yanks out of my grip easily. "You're fucking weak," she scoffs and get into the elevator.
BELLA - I THOUGHT ABOUT just going off on him the entire time but I didn't. I can't help him if he doesn't want help so that's that.
The elevator opens in the lobby with Vince and Mick right there. "Hey you ok?" Vince asks looking a bit clueless to what he's supposed to do. I just started crying, which is odd because these aren't typical people I cry in front of.
They pull me out of the elevator and just embrace me in a hug.
"Hey what's going on?" Mick asks, they both reek of alcohol. I don't say anything and just keep crying. Dylan enters the building.
"Oh my god," he jogs to us and puts his arm around me. "I got her don't worry," he gives a faint smile and guides me to the bus.
"What happened?" He crouches down in-front of me. I don't want to say anything, "C'mon, something's bothering you, you can't just bottle it up."
I basically confessed everything. I told him about when I found out Nikki was doing smack, the overdose, how I tried to help him. And everything up until now.
"Really? I mean I knew he was always doing hard drugs but, heroin?" He seems shocked, "I saw you on smack once and that seemed like hell."
"Yeah, I want to help him but if he isn't willing to accept it then there's nothing anyone can do," I rub my hands on his face in frustration.
"Do you still love him?" Dylan asks. I look at him with furrowed eyebrows.
"I'll always care for him, but I don't love him, also this really isn't the conversation we should be having right now." I say, and he just sits there tucking his lips in. He then gives me a look. "Dylan please don't."
"I didn't say anything," he puts his hands up.
"Yeah but I know that look," I ruffle his hair, "I've been seeing it for the past 13 years."
"I just really see potential, and think you two will probably never get fully over one another," he tilts his head and is hesitant.
"Well your hallucinating, I love Duff, he's nice, sweet, talented, and not a heroin addict," I lay down on the table.
About an hour later we're on our way to the next city. I hid in my bunk the entire night, I just sat there listening to everyone have fun.
I eventually started writing a song that I won't ever do anything with, I haven't done that in awhile, it was nice. I loved making music, it's not my thing anymore. Having it as a career seems like hell, but it's nice to have it as something I enjoy, which I feel like would be ruined if I decided to do anything with this song.
A few hours later we make it to Winnipeg Canada. I hate going across border patrol, I get scared that I'll get deported or hate crimed. Not a fun feeling. - The next day we set up everything for rehearsal. I was on the latter and suddenly hear a big crash, I looked back forgetting I didn't have a harness on and fell back. Next all I saw was black. - so i feel like im moving this story too slow for as far as I want to it to go but don't wanna do a ton of time skips, so should i just give this story a fuck ton of chapters?
