5sos Blurb Book #4

cashton

'wait, stop.'
that's all it took for ashton to move and allow calum to sit up and ashton nodded, taking his hands and running his thumbs over them as he sat in front of him and calum scrutinized him, seeing his lust-filled eyes lose their darkness and his messy hair and his swollen lips and flushed cheeks and calum looked down on their hands and started to cry, small whimpers escaping his lips
'hey, it's okay..' ashton murmured and pulled him in his lap, stroking his clothed back with both hands and calum clung to him like a child, inhaling his smell and nuzzling into him
'i'm sorry..'
calum wanted to give him everything — fucking hell they were married — but he was so so scared and he knew ashton wanted him fully, and that's why he was crying, he was too weak to give him everything, what ashton wanted,
'baby don't feel bad.' he whispered, burying his nose in his hair and calum sniffled
'but i can't give you what you want — still not after j-jacob..' he sobbed
'he's in jail baby, it's okay.' he whispered 'you're safe.' he allowed his eyes to fill
'you're always safe with me.'
he kissed his hair and palmed his lower back, only his thumb drawing circles around his shirt and he felt calum's breaths against his bare chest
'i..i just wanna give you everything.'
ashton tilted his head up
'you've given me everything but sex baby, and yeah — i wanna make love to you but, it's okay if you're scared, i have you.'
calum sucked in his lip and blinked and leaned up to kiss him softly
'i love you.'
ashton smiled
'i love you.'
and they did make love a few days later.