Forever & Always [ J.G | C.D ]

69- Carly

"Is it done yet?" Cameron asked impatiently sprawled across my bed.

After a very awkward supper, Will and Jeanne went home to grab something they needed to stay the night. Jack went to the go and visit Aaron and some of is other friends. Which I was so okay with-- gave me some time to figure my shit out.

"Why did you leave me?" I asked flatly.

"What do you mean?" He asked sitting up quickly.

"Why the fuck did you run off Cameron? Why did you leave me alone with him for a week? Do you even understand how much harder you have made things? He has worked his ass off this week to make sure I was okay. And you know where you were? Only fucking god knows. I needed you," I froze sitting down on the edge of the bed, "I needed you. And as selfish as it is I needed to know I could trust that you would be here for me."

"I love you..." He whispered softly, "But It kills me to see you with him."

The bed began to shift and move as he crawled towards me. I faced away from him-- not wanting him to see how much he really hurt me. Cold fingers pressed against both of my shoulders. They dragged softly across my exposed skin, gliding so effortlessly from my shoulders down to the tops of my hands. He moved his hand away slowly, dragging it back on my hair pulling of the curly strands away from my neck. I sat there patiently awaiting his next move. I closed my eyes letting my imagination running wild with each touch he laid around my ivory skin. Lips pressed to the skin of my next softly, and his hands grasped my hips tightly.

"You are mine," he growled hungrily.

His grip tightened around forcing my body tightly into his. I rolled my head back slowly, turning to stare at him. He looked up and down my figure, licking his lips sexually. My core ached for him. But this wasn't the time. I refused to kiss or sleep with either one of the boys until I have chosen.

"Cam," I spoke sternly, "Please stop. It's been five minutes."

My body trembled with each step I took towards the white stick sitting on my dresser. I wasn't ready for this. This was just one more horrific things to happen in my life. Karma really had a way of fucking up everything. It could change the entire decision I had already made in my mind. It threw a giant curve-ball right into my entire plan. But did I really expect any better? My life was a fucking book being written with every tragedy possible. I wanted them both. I loved them both. I just need time to know who I love more. I need to distance myself. No matter what this test said it wasn't going to shape who I was going to chose. This minor bump isn't going to force me to be with the one I didn't want to be with.

"Cameron. I need to be honest with you before I know if I am or not," I sighed out softly.

"Yes?" He asked curiously.

"I love you...," I turned to face him, "But I love Jack too. And you can hate me all you want. But I can't-do this. I can't choose one of you and possibly end up regretting it in the future. It is unfair to both of you."

"I understand," He mumbled out softly, "Take your time baby."

"I just don't want to hurt you. If I am pregnant I need to end things with him civilly. I at least owe that to him for what I did. I can't be just another Madison to him. I can't hurt him anymore," My lips quivered at the lies coming from my lips.

In truth-- If I was pregnant I don't know If I would be able to be near Cameron. The guilt of this child, this child born of me being a cheater was not how I wanted my life to be. Maybe nature would take its course, maybe one more bad thing could just happen... I can't trust Cameron. What if I lose Jack and it was all some scheme of Cameron's? The grand escapade to ruin my life fully. He used to love destroying me. Breaking my heart has always been the only thing that could make him happy. It's not like I can see into his mind. If there is a child in the picture now. It changes everything.

My hands were shaking as I picked up the pregnancy test. My heart sank.

"It's negative."

8 years ago

"Cameron!" I screamed, looking up at the young boy towering over me.

"You're so pathetic," He hissed through gritted teeth.

Tears formed in my eyes, "Why do you hate me so much?"

"Why wouldn't I hate you? It's fun to break your heart," He began to laugh maniacally.

"I hate you!" I cried out, "I want the old you back. I know you care about me!"

"It's best you don't fall for me Carly Grier, I'll only ever just break your heart," Cameron's voice faded. He turned and walked away.

This was the first time Cameron Dallas broke my heart. It was the same day his father broke his.