Forever & Always [ J.G | C.D ]

73- Cameron

"I'm like a bird!" Hayes screamed obnoxiously into the screen of his cellphone.

I watched around the hotel suite as all of the guys enjoyed themselves, laughing and giggling amongst each other. Jack was locked away in his room like usual. This was hard for both of us. We both loved Carly. It's been months since he has spoken to me. When he isn't doing his shows, he's locked away in his hotel room. I've talked to Carly a handful of times checking up on the baby-- I text her every morning but she never replies. The wars and rumors online are horrendous I wouldn't wish it upon anybody. I can't even imagine how hard things are for Carly back at home.

"I miss cupcake," Shawn whispered sitting down beside me.

"I think we all do," I mumbled out quietly.

"You need to talk to him... We are a team. And I am not saying this to be a douche Cameron. But you are the one at fault. You and Carly broke him with your little secret affair," He paused starring at me deeply, "I get it-- I really do. We don't get to choose who we love. But you are the one at fault."

"Thanks for reminding me," my voice trailed out disembodied.

"I'm sorry man. We just can't deal with this separating us anymore. Someone had too say it."

My body fell back deeper into the couch, exhaustion setting in. These last few months have been horrible. Augustus Waters was correct when he said 'Pain demands to be felt' this is pain that I can't even explain. But the worst part was I had finally found happiness... I finally had everything a guy would want in life. Fame, money, a family-- and it was ripped away from me. And in all honesty I blame Jack. If he would have never came around. If he would have just left and let me be alone with her, she wouldn't have had her feeling come back for him. She was supposed to be mine. That kid is mine and I deserve to be the father that I always wanted to be in my life.

I let out a deary sigh prying myself off the black suede couch, that I was lazily laying against. Sadly Shawn was right. This feud was ruining Magcon. And this was all that some of us had. I walked down the hotel hallway slowly, dreading each step. Questioning why I was doing this. I brought my hand up in a fist knocking loudly on the solid wood door.

"Who is it?" He sniffed out, his voice muffled by the door.

"Cameron."

"Go away," he hissed.

"Please. I just want to talk," I pleaded out desperately.

Footsteps were heard walking closer towards the door before it was ripped open. I starred up at the door, heartache panging at my heart. His eyes were red and puffy-- tears still forming in his waterlines.

"What could you possibly want to talk about? Why you Cameron... Why of all people fucking you. You are nothing. I loved her and you stole her away from me. You treated her like shit for years. And the moment I love her-- No the moment I teach her what love is. You fucking steal her," Jack cried out, anger rising in his voice.

"Jack...," I ran my fingers through my hair, "You need to calm down. Can we just talk about this?"

"Go fuck yourself Cameron. You've ruined everything," Jack's words were like venom.

"We can't keep going about this. We both love Carly-- and we both lost her..." my voice was shaky.

"No. I lost her. Cameron you don't understand. Carly was the love of my life and you stole her from me. That is supposed to be my child Cam! You don't understand how this feels. "

"You think I don't know that Jack? You think I don't feel like a piece of shit? You think I hate not being able to know how my child is doing? You think this is easy for me Jack. No it's fucking not. I've just been letting you run the pity party. I have loved her since I ever laid my eyes on her Jack. Her beautiful brown hair in those adorable little pigtails. You will never understand how much I am so desperately in love with Carly Grier. You used her as a rebound for Madison. And you know what it haunts me every day of how bad I treated her. You know what I probably deserve this... This is my karma for being an asshole to her," My voice broke and tears slide down my cheek, "I am so fucking sorry Jack."

"Cam.." Jack breathed out slowly.

"I can't fix this," my body gave in crashing to the ground, "I ruined everything."

My head fell into my hands and sadness consumed me, everything was my fault.

"Cameron. Calm down. We all ruined everything, but we are the victims here. She played us both for fools. I think it is time we both quit blaming each other, and be there for each other," Jack whispered out softly.

He crouched down in front of me, stretching his hand out to me, "I am sorry too."