Keep Yourself Alive - Roger Taylor

46

Everyone was still in shock over Freddie's departure, as he was already packing for his trip to America. Roger refused to go and see him, but he was still one of my best friends so I had to see him before he went. Brian, John and I were all stood outside his house and as soon as the door opened we were met with the broken eyes of Freddie Mercury.

He let us in and we all just stood there, an awkward tension flowing through the room that I was mentally begging for someone to cut. I thought I'd do the honours, and begin to plead with the singer.

"Please Freddie, don't go" I begged, looking at him with sad eyes.

"I have to, this is what I'm meant to be doing" he said, but it was more like he was reassuring himself not us.

"You'll miss the wedding. If you go I mean" I stated, but he looked at me with a sympathetic look.

There was another awkward pause, one that not even I wanted to break in this moment. The fact that Freddie was actually leaving was always the plan, but I never thought it would be the reality. No matter what he says about not having a family, we are his family. We would never trade him for anything because in our eyes he is like our blood. I don't have the best family either, hell Roger is all I've got, but at least Freddie has a loving mother and father.

"I'm sorry, Rose. And I wish you well for the baby too" He said.

"You'll be gone that long?" I gasped, and looked between the three lads.

They all just gave me an either angered or saddened glance and I turned back to look at Freddie.

"Come on, Fred. She's your best mate, you have to be here to support her" John sighed, rubbing his face tiredly with his hand.

"Exactly, she should support him too" an Irish accent suddenly called from the stairs, and down came Paul.

"You stay out of this, right?" Brian said angrily, although his tone was still polite.

"I won't actually, this man is your friend and you're all being selfish and treating him like shit. You should be supportive and happy for him" Paul said, his thick Irish accent ringing through our ears.

"We are supportive. If you didn't see we all got excited when he mentioned the solo albums, it was when he fired our best manager and then broke up Queen that made us 'selfish' as you call it" Deacy said, with the harshest tone I've ever heard him utter.

"Do you know what? I wish-" Paul started, but Brian cut him off.

"Sorry Freddie we must be dashing off, we've got solo albums to start, bye" He said sarcastically and we all left the house.

I turned to give him one last saddened glance before mumbling one last sentence.

"I wish you well Fred, send me postcards yeah?" I pleaded, and he nodded his head.

Paul slammed the door shut before me, making me flinch back in shock.

My god, what a prick.

We all got into the car before speeding off back to Brian's, where we would meet Roger.

As soon as we hit the road our anger was prominent, and we took turns to express our hatred for the Irish twat.

"He's so controlling, how different would Freddie be if it wasn't for that bastard?" John said.

"Very. And so would ours. We would still be a group for starters, it's him that basically convinced Freddie to fire John too" Brian shook his head, clutching the wheel until his knuckles turned white.

Suddenly I felt a little kick in my stomach, and my hand flew to the area in shock. The feeling went away quickly, without the lads even noticing me flinch.

"Don't even get me started on that, and don't mention it to Rog either he-" I started but the feeling came back.

Only this time it was ten times worse, and very painful. I winced in pain, clutching my stomach and bending over.

"Rose, what's wrong?" Brian asked worriedly, looking in his mirror at me.

"I think the baby might be kicking?" I asked, but of course it wasn't that.

"I don't think the baby can kick at four weeks love, we need to get you to the hospital" John soothed, unbuckling his belt and jumping into the back with me, all whilst the car was still moving.

"What? No I'm f-fine" I winced.

The pain was terrible, and I had no idea what it was. Is this normal? I've never been pregnant before, I have no idea.

"You're not fine, when we get there I'll call Roger and tell him where we are" Brian nodded, trying to calm me down.

"What is it?" I asked, a few tears pouring from my eyes.

"I don't know, hun. Just stay calm, hopefully it's just growing pains" John reassured, before pulling me in to lean on his shoulder.

This is the exact opposite of how I pictured today going. Not only did I have the stress of saying goodbye to Freddie, but now I have unusually painful cramps in my stomach that are definitely not normal. The fear was almost as excruciating as the pain, as I sat and thought about all of the bad things that could be occurring at present. The only thing I want right now is Roger, and even he isn't here because he was too much of am idiot to not say goodbye to his mate. It's all just a bad coincidence, but the odds are definitely not in my favour today.

All I can do right now is hope that these are just the growing pains that John was so sure about.