Keep Yourself Alive - Roger Taylor

77

It was time to bid a sad farewell to the four boys as they made their way to the airport. I had already had a few hormonal sniffles, that Roger had wiped away before I burst out into a crying fit.

We reached the end of the terminal, where I had to leave them. I wasn't ready to leave them, even if it was tomorrow I wouldn't be either. It must be the hormones, or maybe it's just the undying reality that I can't last a day without Rogers perfection and company. Maybe it sounded pathetic, maybe it sounded reasonable, but nothing can control your own emotions and at the moment they are going crazy with sadness.

John pulled me into a hug, swaying me from side to side as he kissed the top of my head sweetly.

"Look after yourself okay? I've told Veronica to keep checking up on you" He nodded at me, and I mirrored his action with a swift nod.

"You too, and you're the relatively responsible one, so please look after the others, especially Fred and Rog" I giggled, trying to lighten the mood.

"Ah c'mere" Deacy replied, pulling me into another hug before allowing me to say goodbye to the others.

"Bye Rose, please stay safe" Brian ordered, pulling me into an embrace and leaving a peck on my cheek.

"I will, and you too" I chuckled.

"Oh, I forgot to ask. Would you be able to refill the badger and hedgehog homes in my garden with some cat food?" He asked, and with a confused glance I just nodded in agreement.

"You're a star" He grinned, kissing my forehead before joining John.

Then, Freddie strolled over to me and engulfed me into a tighter hug than ever, spinning me around slightly.

"Freddie-" I winced, as he almost squeezed the life out of me.

"I know I'm sorry dear, but I'm going to miss you so much" He said sadly.

"Me too" I pouted, and he just pulled me into another hug.

"I'll sing a song for you every night... what do you want it to be? I can add it to the set list" he offered, and of course I agreed happily.

"Keep yourself alive?" I asked hopefully, and he nodded in agreement.

"Ah Yes, although I should have thought of that one already, why did I not think of that?" He asked himself in annoyance.

"Try record one night yeah? And send it to me in the post so I can watch you all?" I begged.

"Of course darling, anything" He nodded, kissing my temple before joining the other two in the baggage area.

"We better leave these two to it lads, let's go. Bye Rose, good luck with the baby" Brian nodded over to us, and I pushed away a tear before waving them off.

Roger slumped over to me sadly, his fur coat and sunglasses making him look extremely handsome as he made his way over.

"Roger stop being a moody git" I tried to laugh and lighten the mood, but tears were coming out of my eyes which made my lie rather unconvincing.

"Aw god, don't cry love" Roger sighed, wiping them from my eyes.

"I can't help it, I'm... I'm scared Roger" I admitted, and the pain in his eyes was evident.

" I know, but it will be like I've never gone. Ring me or my parents whenever you need okay? And I mean whenever. If you wake up at three in the morning with a headache, you call me. If you feel sad, you call me. Hell, if you just want a bloody chat, you call me straight away with no hesitation" He ordered, and I nodded.

"Yeah, Yeah I will" I nodded, sniffling as I looked up into his piercing eyes.

"Here, you're taking this. Wear it, you look better in it than me anyways" Roger said, pulling his cream fur coat off and wrapping it over my shoulders.

"Aw Roger, you love this coat, you wear it everyday almost" I laughed through my tears.

"Whatever. Wait..." he said, rummaging in the pocket for something.

It was a Polaroid picture of the two of us, kissing on stage. I remember it now, it was from their first tour with 'Mott the Hoople' and Mary had taken it from the audience when they were setting up.

I wasn't even supposed to be on stage, but I went on anyway to wish them all good luck.

"You've kept this in your pocket all that time?" I asked in awe, staring down at the tiny photograph in his palm. It maybe tiny, but it holds the key to a whirlpool of memories in my mind, from the hotels to the concerts, to the times I spent getting to know the band and Roger especially.

"Yeah, I take it everywhere" he said, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Aw Roger, I don't want you to go" I said, jumping up and kissing him passionately.

I know that saying these things will make him want to stay even more, but I couldn't help it. He was too close to me and not having him for a month will be the death of me I swear.

We pulled away, our arms still intertwined around each other's necks for the closest proximity we could possible achieve.

"Last call for Stockholm, Sweden"

My breathing hitched when they announced the last call for their plane, and our foreheads pressed together firmly.

Suddenly, he knelt down before me and placed his hands on my huge eight month baby bump. He leaned in and took one last listen to the slow pulsing that could be felt through my skin, and a small smile appeared on his face.

"You be good to your mum okay? And wait for me to be in London so it's easy for me to get here Yeah? I need to see my little girl when she's born" He beamed excitedly, talking to the bump sweetly. He left a small kiss over my top before standing up back to my level.

"Still gonna be a girl then?" I asked, grabbing his hands in mine again.

"I think so" He nodded with a grin on his features.

"I love you Roger, please stay safe love. Just don't do anything stupid, and don't spend too long worrying about me yeah?" I said, intertwining my fingers in his.

"Yeah" He sighed, pulling me in for another long and passionate kiss before breaking apart.

"Have a ball, Taylor" I smiled sadly, pulling away.

"You too, Taylor. I love you so much" he replied, looking behind him to see the other three watching us intently.

"Love you too, now go, you have fans to impress" I forced a smile.

He walked away as slowly as possible, keeping our fingers joint until our fingertips lost connection.

One last wave was the final thing I'd see of Roger for a whole month.