Keep Yourself Alive - Roger Taylor

66

I had to make a call. It's been playing on my mind for a while now but I couldn't think of how to start it or how to even pick up the phone and get the courage to call. Of course I'm talking about the modelling agency, but I have no headshots or even modelling experience to begin.

The phone was clutched between my hands and the phone number, that the wedding dress lady wrote down for me, resting on the side.

I typed in the numbers, clicking the green button and resting it to my ear.

It rang.

My heart began to flutter. I haven't had a job in years now, and last time I just sold cups of tea and biscuits to pensioners in a local cafe. This is completely different.

It rang again.

I nodded to reassure myself. I can do this, I need to show Roger that I can be independent.

"Hello? Vogue main office how can I help you?" A lady said back to me in the phone.

Vogue? She never mentioned it being vogue, how will I ever get a place at vogue being a new model?

"Hi, I'm Rose Taylor, I bought a wedding dress from Mrs Jones-" I started.

"Oh of course! She's been expecting a call from you for months, I'll pass you onto her husband now"  The lady replied.

"Thank you" I said and my heart did several extra beats.

Vogue? They've been waiting for me? What the actual hell?

"Mrs Taylor? Hello it's Eric Jones from Vogue magazine, I believe you met with my wife when you bought your dress? I have your pictures here, I'd love for you to be one of our cover girls" He offered.

"Are you serious? I've never been a model before- I don't even know what to do" I stated truthfully.

"Well you clearly took to it easily enough. And with you being Roger Taylor's wife, thousands of women will buy this to get your secret" he replied.

A pang if anger ran through my chest. So this is why they want me, not because I'm pretty at all. Just so they can sell pictures of Rogers Taylor's wife and sell my 'secrets'.

"Is that why you're wanting me then? It's nothing to do with my pictures is it? It's just because I'm his wife" I stated.

"Well I suppose that's part of it yes but-"

I replied to him by hanging up and slamming the phone back down.

"Unbelievable" I huffed, throwing myself into the sofa in defeat.

I just got offered the job of a lifetime, why did I turn it down? I'm so stupid it's unreal. The fact that they only wanted me because of Roger does make my blood boil though, but I can see their motive. They want money, that's fair enough. A few tears rolled from my eyes and I slumped into the kitchen.

Roger was out practicing with the lads, so I had the house to myself. Rummaging through the fridge I found the nearest bottle of alcohol I could and dragged it out. Whiskey? Wow, Rose you can't even find nice alcohol properly. It was half empty too, so I wouldn't even get a full bottle.

As I waked back into the living room, I didn't even bother to get a glass as I screwed off the top and began to down the disgusting spirit. I'd always really been one to drown my sorrows in a drink, and this was no different. It may seem pathetic, but because of that stupid phone call I've never felt so unwanted and ugly.

I cringed in disgust as the warming drink poured down my throat, leaving a burning sensation behind.

I was drinking away the magazine, and the baby, and the drugging and the countless times I'd been humiliated by my family. It felt good to wash it all away finally. Looking back, it is quite unbelievable how much shit I've gone through, however Roger has kept me sane throughout it all, not to mention the other three lads who have been amazing.

I let my head fall into my hands as I sobbed into them, creating a small pool of salty tears. Maybe I was being pathetic, but sometimes it's good to let it all out. We bottled it up too much, with the baby thing. I thought at the time it was the best thing to do but clearly not.

————————————————

Rogers pov

I jingled my car keys between my fingers, unlocking the front door and walking in. It was quite late as we've been practicing all day, but it was worth it as I get to come home to my beautiful girl.

"Rose I'm home!" I shouted cheerfully, as I shut the door and went into the living room.

The first thing I saw was her curled up on the sofa asleep, and then my eyes wandered to the empty whiskey bottle on the floor. As I got closer I noticed that her cheeks were stained red from crying, and she was in a restless sleep.

I didn't want to wake her, so instead I grabbed a blanket and placed it over her. Then I grabbed one for myself and laid down on the floor next to the sofa, watching her worriedly as she moved in her sleep. Every slight moment made my eyes bolt up in shock, what had happened?

She was clearly extremely upset about something. I know her and I know that she gets shit faced to forget her worries. This is something that I hate about leaving all day. I think I'm going to come back to a happy wife all of the time but that's just not realistic. I just hate seeing her so upset and not being able to do anything about it. Her hand had fallen over the edge of the sofa, so I took it in mine and rubbed circles into it soothingly.

As if she knew it was me, her sleep instantly settled and a small smile appeared onto my face.