Living In The Mind's Cage

85.

I could write a billion words
They wouldn't mean a thing

I could read thousands of books
None could give real life coloring

I could sing one hundred songs
My voice could leave my throat

None could convey
That I want you to stay
In such profound little words

I could strengthen my tone
Lick my lips
Urging the words from my mouth

The pain in my chest
Can never be put to rest
You could never understand what this is about

Seeing your back turned
Sends my heart awry

And although you'll come back
Every panic attack
Makes me break down and cry

I am in an empty room
Just my thoughts and I

The space gets darker
My mind goes darker
By now I want to die

Alone in this cell
My personal hell
I could leave anytime I want

But why would I do that?
With every lie
And every taunt

I don't feel so well

Every minute is painful
Every hour is dread
These toxic ramblings
While I am scrambling
To get away from my own head

So yea
I could read

I could write

I could listen to every song

They'll distract me
'Til you come back to me
And the waiting won't be wrong

I'll sing to you my love
I'll write about your smile

I'll read books that remind me of you
Once you're back in my arms for a while

I'll kiss every inch of your face
As a thought goes away with each one

I'll hold you against me
Breathing you in
As everything dark is gone

You look at me with that light
My head is immediately silenced

You assure me it's alright
And I wonder why my mind is so violent

With you here it's easy
To have the will to live

I can picture my life with you
Could be a wife to you
And it seems easy to forgive

Life could be so simple
If I just didn't listen

But my brain is so loud
And every thought shrouds
Any good that could come

So I'll stand in the rain
Swallow the pain
Smile as I cry

I'll try to show that I'm okay
By giving life a try

Sing with me
Read with me
Write everything down

We just might make it
If we fake it
And don't listen to the sound.

~~RDP~~