Soulless Chapter 32:
Recognizing Pain
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The moment i step at the gate of Harilia Vaste's ay ang siya namang paglabas ni Kara at ng dalawang personal na tauhan ng aking ama.
They bowed their head before me, before one of them approach me with the palace message.
"Lady Elise, your father order us to bring you to the palace immediately. The palace receive a news that you skip your-"
"Enough, alam ko na ang rason. Ihatid niyo nalang ako." I cut them off as i know the reason why.
Gaya ng inaasahan, umabot na kaagad sa palasyo ang pagkawala ko, and that alone might triggered the whole palace to go on a full operation to find me, just like the old times.
"Yes, young lady."
They guide me to a car, and the ride to the palace doesn't take that long.
The Queen's face is the first thing i saw when i step at the ground of my father's home. She looks worried as she hug me, but i know better. It is just a facade, a cover of a true great artist.
Walang pagmamahal at pag-aalala sa yakap niya, instead all i feel was the same emotion that she embed on my skin when i was a child, fear.
She look straight to my eyes as she give an order to our head servant "Violetta, guide my daughter to her room and please help her to dress for the family's dinner." She smile at me- an evil one, sending me the message me that i will receive a slap that i deserve for disobeying her again.
"Go upstairs my dear, will wait in the dining." She tap cheeks once before she left me with violetta.
Our head servant look so worried as she guided me to my room. Yung pag-aalala na dapat sa totoong nanay ko nakukuha ay siya ang nagpaparamdam.
"Look at you young lady, you deserve to have a good bath for your whole day adventure. When someone called the household, i really got worried, so worried that i keep on calling Lady Athalia to ask her about you. But even the Valentin's daughter doesn't know anything and-."
I hug her and tap her back to stop her.
"I know Violetta, i know. And i am thankful but i feel sorry too for making you feel that." Lumayo ako ng bahagya at naupo sa isa sa mga couch na nakalagak sa kwarto ko. I look at her and smile a little. "If the queen finds out about it, she'll get mad at you so stop it now, okay? I am fine now Violetta."
Pero tila naging mas problemado pa si Violetta dahil sa sinabi ko, bago lumapit sa isang pinto kung saan nakalagay ang mga damit ko.
When she came back, she handed me a dress- a red devil one.
"When will you call her your mother Darling?" Napahinto ako sa paghuhubad ng tanungin niya iyon. "Addressing her as the queen means that you respect her as the citizen of her land but what about the daughter of this family? What about you young lady?"
I stared at the floor, trying to find the answer on her question. And as i stared at it, i know i find the answer.
"Violetta, the family dinner is waiting for me. Let's stop this conversation."
Hindi na siya nagpilit pa, sa halip ay tinulungan niya akong mag-ayos nang hindi na tinatanong sa akin ang isang bagay na hindi ko alam kung kailan ba dapat sagutin.
I keep my mouth shut as the dinner went, kami lamang ng reyna ang nasa hapag ngunit ang pakiramdam ng bawat pagsubo at pag-inom ay tila katumbas ng isandaang parusa. Sinabi niyang nasa Harilia Vaste's ang aking ama, dahil kay alicia.
Hindi ko malaman kung ano ang dapat kong maramdaman ng mga oras na yun habang sinesermunan ako ng reyna, but i couldn't hear anything from it. Tumatango lamang ako sa mga sinasabi niya ngunit ang isip ko ay nasa mga panahong kinailangan ko ng isang ama ngunit walang dumating.
Para akong may listahan ng nakaraan na isa-isang bumabagsak sa harapan ko ang bawat isang pahina. I could feel the constricting pain in my chest but i couldn't show it. Siguro dahil kaharap ko ang reyna, siguro ay dahil nasanay na ang katawan kong wag magpakita ng emosyon sa tuwing nasa paligid siya.
Maybe she noticed how i disregard her presence kaya nakatanggap ako ng dalawang sampal bilang parusa. Doon ko lamang naalalang nasa hapag kami at naghahapunan.
"I didn't know i raise a weak daughter. If you can't fight for your right as the princess of this city then maybe you are not the right person to be the queen of this palace Selestina! Ibigay mo nalang kaya sa kapatid mo ang titulong iyon, mukha naman kasing mas babagay sa kaniya kumpara sayo."
Napahigpit ang hawak ko sa tinidor matapos niyang sabihin iyon then she left. Leaving me alone with the hatred and madness at my situation.
"Wala akong kapatid at ako lang ang magiging reyna ng bayang ito" i whisper and stared at the bloody meat in front of me. Imagining that it is the flesh and blood of Alicia.
I leave the palace after being alone on the dining table, nawalan ako ng ganang kumain habang iniisip si Alicia. The girl who happen to steal that things that are mine.
Bumalik ako sa paaralan only to find out a wolf waiting outside my close window.
He called my name but i never open it. Instead i just look at him.
He knock on the window and keep asking me 'why? What the fuck is my problem? And why can't i open it for him'.
Naririnig ko siya, malinaw. Ngunit habang tinititigan ko siya hindi ko namalayan ang sarili kong tinatanong ang mga bagay na dapat ay nasa isip ko lang.
"Bakit hindi niyo ko kayang mahalin pabalik?" He stop knocking and just stared at my face with tears.
"Eloisa, buksan mo to pakiusap. Mag-usap tayo."
I smile sadly and instead of opening it for him, i just closed the curtain. Leaving me alone in the dark, recognizing the answer to my own question.
"They can't love me because i am not into the light. I am not the light."
BINABASA MO ANG
The Soulless Queen (COMPLETED)
VampireI am the fruits of the two pure flowers. Pag-iibigan na matagal ng itinakda. Legal Totoo At puro. My mother fell in love with my father. She fight but she never win his heart. She live in a castle but cage in her own nightmare. And i, as there he...
