PINK RIBBONS

30.

staring at the clock through blood shot red eyes cameron cursed under his breath as he read the numbers three: forty nine. falling back into the bed he was beyond exhausted and would be even more as he had to get up in a couple hours to get ready for work.

laying there still her eyes scanning the pitch black bed room flow wanted to pull her hair out as arie's cries became louder and louder with each passing second. placing her hand over her face her eyes stinging her so bad that tears trickled down her cheeks she wondered if she just laid there silent arie would eventually stop.

"flow" cameron called her name easing up out of the bed.

"yes ?" she answered him knowing what was to come already.

"you gon' go get her ?" cameron asked arie's cries getting to him. just wanting her to stop. just wanting to go back to bed.

"why don't you go get her ? " flow asked as she had been the one picking arie up all night. as a matter a fact she got out of bed almost all the times to get arie. and she definitely stayed up with her into the wee hours of the morning. hoping by the good grace of GOD arie would take pity on her and fall asleep

"flow, i got to get up in a couple a hours to go to work. i am tired" cameron told her as he was beyond exhausted.

"i am too" flow replied as she too was dead tired.

"just go pick her up man" he told her turning back over his side fixing the comforter over him. laying there flow wondered if he was serious. wondered if he didn't see that she too was beyond exhausted. so tired that in her dreams she dreamed of sleep.

"FLOW" cameron shouted when she didn't move, arie's cries becoming louder. kicking the sheets from off of her flow got out of the bed angrily going over to pick up arie from the bassinet that was in their bedroom.

going back over to the bed, flow switched on the light as she tried to calm arie down. sticking her nipple into arie's mouth she finally got her to be quiet. "cameron" she called.

"what ?" cameron asked. "can you get me a diaper ?" flow questioned.

"why can't you get it ?" he asked flow.

"because i am feeding her. it is right there" flow told him as the diapers were over in the rocking in the corner. turning back over on his back cameron just looked up at the ceiling. getting out of the bed he grabbed a couple of diapers and the wipes heading back over to the bed and handing them to flow.

rolling her eyes as she knew why he took the whole bag, she just turned her head from him. crawling back under the sheets cameron turned on his side opposite to flow, a sure sign that he didn't want to be bothered with anything else.

burping arie once she was finish flow got back up with her, bringing her back over to the bassinet to put her back to sleep.

moving away from the bassinet when she saw that arie's eyes were closed she went to go bad to bed. rolling her eyes as she was just about to climb under the comforter and pooter (the dog she swore she wouldn't let cameron get) barked from hearing police sirens outside flow could have cried when arie woke back up, crying immediately.

rushing over to the crib she picked up arie trying to lull her back to sleep. " OH MY GOD" cameron called out dragging the pillow that he was laying on over his face,hoping he could stifle himself.

"make her stop" he begged flow when arie just burst into all out scream fest. "what do you think i am trying to do ?" flow asked patting arie's back underneath her.

"obviously what your doing isn't working" he criticized flow

"well what do you suggest ?" she asked sarcastically. "she wouldn't be crying if that damn dog you got her didn't wake her up" she told him.

"oh so this is my fault ?" cameron asked.

"i told you not to get it . but you didn't listen did you !" flow screamed at him causing arie to go into another fit.

"now great. great flow just fucking great !" cameron cursed. "look what you did" he told her pointing at arie crying.

"me ?" flow asked him

"yeah man" he hissed his teeth getting up out of the bed.

"where are you going ?" flow asked him when he grabbed his pillow from off the bed. "to get some damn sleep so i don't lose my fucking mind" he told flow walking out of the room leaving flow to tend to arie all by herself.

"where have you been ?" flow asked cameron as he came in at one in the morning. looking up at flow cameron's eyes were glazed.

"out" he told flow dropping his keys on the table by the door.

"where is out ?" she asked him.

"does it matter ?" he questioned just wanting to go take a shower and get into his bed.

"yes ! i have been calling your phone and you keep sending my calls straight to voice-mail" she told him. "you keep doing this bullshit" flow cursed. "ignoring my fucking calls what if something was wrong with arie ? huh ? but i guess you don't give a shit right. you up under brandon them smoking out there and shit. acting like you don't got a fucking kid at home" flow told him knowing that is where he was coming from.

"first of all ain't nobody was ignoring your fucking calls my phone is dead" cameron told her pulling his phone out of his pocket.

"if that was the case you should have taken your ass home you don't know what could have happen -"

"nothing happened did it. is something wrong with her ?" cameron asked looking into arie's room to see her sleeping. "no. she's fucking fine. so shut the fuck up about it" he cursed back at flow just wanting to be left alone. "all you do is fucking nag. so what the fuck i went out and chilled with my boys is it a fucking crime ?" he asked flow.

"it is when you do it ALL the time !" flow screamed at him. " you don't know how to find your house in the night time. brandon them don't have a kid cameron. you aren't one of them anymore" flow told him

"just because i have a kid flow don't mean i can't hang out with my friends. i am not going to stop living my life because arie is here." he told her

"oh and i should stop ?" flow asked him.

"nobody told you to stop flow" cameron retorted

"no it was just kind of expected right ? all i do is take care of arie cameron. i don't get to go out like you do. i don't get to roll in at one in the morning from hanging out with my friends. i don't get to be like you and it is not fair" flow told him at wits end with how much her life had changed and how little cameron's did.

"yo' you make it seem like you taking care of a baby is anything hard" cameron hissed. "you make it seem like you do the most. all you do is change diapers all day. that is fucking nothing !" he shouted "try standing out in the hot ass fucking sun all day"

"i do nothing ?" flow asked him.

"you don't. you just sit and find shit to nag about. that is all you do flow. you nag ... nag, nag fucking nag. everyday it is something new with you. it seems like as i step out the door and come back in you find something else to bitch at"

"fuck you" flow cursed at him near tears his words hurting her.

"i wish you would. can't tell the last time you've given me some pussy" cameron told her.

falling silent flow just stared at him. shaking her head she just threw her hands up at him. turning on her heels she walked into their bed room slamming the door falling on the bed in tears.

standing there for a moment cameron rolled his eyes when he heard flow crying. hissing his teeth he went to go after her. stopping half way when he heard arie's cries he sighed making a b-line to her bedroom to soothe her instead of her mother.

picking up arie from her crib , cameron sat in the rocking chair shaking his head at how much his and flow's relationship had changed. how much had changed and how much would as he now had gotten word that he was officially being drafted. looking down at arie he looked back up his heart wondering if he and flow was really strong enough to make it