PINK RIBBONS

45

"you think it is true when they say you will never get over your first love ?" cameron questioned brandon out of no where.

"what ?" brandon questioned easing up out of the couch to put his drink on the coaster knowing how much a bitch cameron could be about water marks on his furniture.

"you heard me. you think it is true when they say you will never get over your first love" cameron repeated.

"i heard your question loud and clear. i just don't understand where it came from"

"just answer me" cameron told brandon.

turning to his friend brandon gave him a look searching his face only to see a gloomy expression on it.

"is this about flow ?" he asked him knowing it must of been. because the only time cameron ever tried to have a serious discussion about love was when it involved flow.

"you know it is" cameron told him "now do you think it is true when they say you don't ever get over your first love" he questioned once again.

"i mean yeah i think there is some truth to it. i never really got over tanya" brandon told him "i just moved on."

"fuck" cameron cursed

"what ?" brandon questioned at cameron's outburst.

"i want to get over flow man. i want to move on from her" cameron spoke with so much truth. "i just want to stop loving her because i think she doesn't love me. like i am really starting to believe she hates me and doesn't want anything to do with me"

"how you figure that ?" brandon questioned not seeing how flow acted as if she hated cameron because to his knowledge she spoke to him civil and he could never say he heard her speak ill of him.

"because of everything. she went and got a house and didn't tell me. which on some real shit fucked me up man. because that was one of the only things she had ever really wanted from this. she didn't want clothes, money - nothing. all she wanted was us to build a dream house where we could raise kids that is it. she didn't ask for anything more. and to see that she went and got that shit on her own just ..." falling silent all cameron could do was let out a deep sigh as he was truly hurt by what her getting a home meant.

"well i mean what do you expect ?" brandon questioned hunching his shoulders. "you and her aren't together anymore. she is not going to look to you for anything. you know she ain't like that."

"i know she isn't like that. but i want her to be. i want her to come to me when she needs things i want her to ask. i just want to feel fucking needed in her life man." cameron admitted

easing away from cameron, brandon just looked at him as he was taken a back by his comment.

"yes i said it" cameron told him "i don't care how much a bitch i sound like. that is all the fuck i want. i want her need to me i want to know i am important in her damn life like she is in mine."

"yo' son do you hear yourself ?" brandon asked.

"yeah i hear myself. i am saying the words ain't i ?" cameron asked.

"no saying the words and hearing them are two different things. it is like you ain't in reality" brandon shook his head "my nigga she ain't gon' come to you and ask you for nothing because you and her ain't together."

"because she don't want to work things out" cameron countered

"and i wonder why is that" brandon questioned rhetorically

"because she can't move on and forget the past."

"how she gon' forget the past when the past is in the present ?"

"huh ?" cameron questioned.

"when your with drew my nigga" brandon laughed unable to help it.

"i am tired of telling you i am not with drew. i fuck her but i am not with her" cameron tried to explain.

"YOOO" brandon called out laughing as he found cameron truly funny.

"why the fuck you be laughing at serious shit man ?" cameron asked annoyed with brandon's random laughing.

"because we go through this same conversation every time i am here. and it leads to the same shit. you can't be with drew and want flow back. you can't go tell the girl you love her and shit yet your parlaying around with the woman you cheated on her with it just don't work"

"you don't know how much times i've told drew to leave me the fuck alone." cameron told him "how many times i've told her i am through with her and go back to flow begging flow to be back with me. but she ain't having it. so sometimes i just be like fuck it man."

"man this is all some bullshit" brandon told him "some soap opera bullshit. why don't you just leave drew alone for good. if you want your family back end things with her. go about your business"

"you make things sound so simple" cameron shook his head.

"because it is. you the one over there making it hard"

"you must have not met drew" cameron shook his head "the bitch is crazy"

"and what that make you. you the one who fucked her" brandon countered

"shut up" cameron told him

"yeah man. sometimes what looks good ain't always the best for you " brandon nodded his head. taking up his glass and putting it to his lips cameron could do nothing but agree