Beyond Control

Chapter 19

Since Wei Wuxian moved into the Hanshi with me, I have come to pick up some things on his character and personality. He, for one, likes to talk, no matter the topic he will just talk. He is very smart, the amount of talismans he has shown me and has created himself, I found impressive. Another thing, his is actually not at all as much trouble as one would expect. Even if he was bed ridden, he would tell me stories of what he'd do back in Lotus Pier growing up. Picking lotus pods, hanging out at the archery range, keeping himself in his room and crafting charms and talisman to his heart's content.

Aside from him liking to talk when given the opportunity, he was actually pretty quiet. If he has something to keep him busy, he will be content with it for hours and keep to himself. I found that this boy who's laugh you could hear across Cloud Recesses, actually has a quiet personality. I found it to be intriguing. Though, I wondered to what extent he had the freedom to actually be his loud happy self...if that was actually the real him.

Maybe Wei Wuxian was a person who was actually fairly quiet. People just made him out to be a trouble maker and mischievous because of all the punishments Yunmeng had gladly shared among the other sects. Did Wei Wuxian not actually have a private life? Did anyone really give him the benefit of the doubt that he was a good kid?

He has been in Cloud Recesses for a couple weeks, and has been staying with me for only a couple days. I have come to learn more about him then a lot of people would think. I probably know just as much about Wei Wuxian as I do about my brother Wangji. He even behaved well and listened to instructions from the healer and Wen Qing. He would do as they asked of him. Some of his more minor fractures have already begun to heal or even almost healed. The more serious ones, will take some time.

His dantian has been healing nicely as well. Wen Qing would check it daily or every other day. She has found that the treatments have been working alright. She suspects the cold spring has helped a lot with his healing.

As of right now, he was asleep. I was catching up on some things for the sect. So many things as a sect leader to look into. The night hunt that is coming up, I have to go and so does Wangji. Wei Wuxian, being the Jiang Sect's head disciple, also had to be there. I just don't think Wei Wuxian will be well enough to attend.

As I was working, I heard whimpering coming from his room. I stopped what I was doing and went to go check on him. He was dreaming, and the resentful energy he was telling me about, was shielding him. I took out Liebing and started to play a relaxing tune. It not only caused the resentment to dissipate, but it calmed Wei Wuxian down.

I stopped playing and moved to sit beside him as he slept. He rolled to his side, like he could sense my presence, and snuggled close to me. I found it kind of cute. Wei Wuxian liked to snuggle up, I just wished it was my brother experiencing this instead. I was happy to comfort him though, as he needed it. I slowly and gently started running my fingers through his hair. I saw him trying to move into the touch as I did so.

He then started talking in his sleep, it made my heart ache a bit, "Lan Zhan, I'm sorry."

He was apologetic to my brother. I wondered if he thought I was him.

"Don't leave me," he said, his voice held a bit of pain as he spoke, "I'll go back with you."

Back....maybe back here to Gusu...my brother tried numerous times to convince him to come, it took more of my encouragement and gaining his trust that managed to get him here. I didn't know he held such deep pain for Wangji.

Why don't you ever say how you really feel about him? Has anyone asked you how you felt? Or have you ever had the chance to look into your heart for him?

Wei Wuxian has suffered more than anyone I know. Wangji suffered a lot through his childhood. I wondered if it was the similar thing that happened to be helpful in getting close to the other.

Think about all of what Wei Wuxian is going through at the moment, and the upcoming night hunt, how was Wei Wuxian even going to participate? He has no golden core, his spiritual energy is closed off. Sending him to a night hunt is like sending a lamb into a slaughterhouse. I had to think of some sort of reason to convince Jiang Wanyin not to have him participate...maybe say he got injured while helping us and he doesn't have the strength to hunt. This hunt was in two weeks. I had to speak with Wen Qing on what we could do for Wei Wuxian.

"Xichen-ge?" I heard Wei Wuxian asked.

I looked down at him, "you're awake."

"Why are you here by me? Not that I don't mind?" He asked.

"You we're having a bad dream. I managed to calm you down and then decided to sit with you. You snuggled close to me on your own," I told him.

"Oh," he said slowly sitting up, "I have a habit of snuggling up to others if they are near me. I think it's the warmth that causes me to move closer."

"Were you cold?" I asked.

"No," he said and looked me in the eyes, "you look stressed about something."

"There is a night hunt coming up in two weeks. The Jin Sect are running it. The other sects are to join...I am to be there as I am a sect leader. Wangji has to be there because he is an heir. I assume you'd have to go because you are Jiang Wanyin's head disciple," I explained.

"Oh," he said understanding my predicament, "is it...bad that I don't want to be around so many people? Especially right now?"

"No, you are recovering from a huge ordeal...I just need something to convince your brother and sister that having you participate is not in your best interest," I told him.

"Tell them I got injured...they don't need to know the whole story. Technically I am injured. If they know I am unable to help them, they shouldn't force me into anything. If Jiang Cheng causes an issue, Shijie would step in," he said.

"How do we say you got injured? Especially under my watch?" I asked.

"Ugh...I am recovering from encountering a strong corpse...I am here 'helping' with your fierce corpse issue. One just got to close to me and it caused a few bones to break....I know lying is against your sect principles but I figured it's close to what I am dealing with. I have broken bones, so it would help cover that up...as for my energy, you have been helping me get back on my feet and using a sword. I decided that you guys here in Gusu are doing good on helping me. I was recovering from trauma the Wen's put me through which caused me to use such a path."

"You really thought this out on the spot," I said calmly, "it is a partial truth but a partial lie, so I suppose it would be fine."

He nodded, "I have been quick on my feet on trying to think of ways to get out of trouble sometimes. It works occasionally but not all the time."

"You don't have to worry, Wangji and I will help you," I told him.

"I appreciate it," he said.